After A Tease Like This, Square Enix Had Sure As Hell Better Release Bravely Default In The West

Illustration for article titled After A Tease Like This, Square Enix Had Sure As Hell Better Release emBravely Default/em In The West

Japanese developer/publisher/dream-ruiner Square Enix has become rather infamous for launching teasers and countdown clocks that get fans' hopes wayyy up, only to crush them later. Social games without music. Mobile games that only exist to take your money. That sort of thing.


So when I saw this message on the official Twitter account for Bravely Default: Flying Fairy, the 3DS role-playing game that Square has yet to announce for release in North America, I couldn't help but get nervous:


(The first line, as translated by Bashcraft: "It's been a while since we accessed Twitter. The voices from those folks aboard are definitely getting through!" The second line is their English translation of that, and the third line says that they used a machine translator to turn it English.)

So, okay. On one hand, this is great! A tweet like that must mean they're bringing it over here, no? After something like this, if the game doesn't make it to North America and Europe, fans will revolt.

On the other hand, this is Square Enix. They could never announce anything at all. They could turn Bravely Default into a browser game that runs on your tears. You never know.

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Their roadmap, I assume, looks something like this...

2013: Five to seven more mobile device ports and original, poorly conceived titles.

2014: Final Fantasy XIII Zero: Lightning's Origin

2015: Final Fantasy VIII remake, followed by feature length film sequel. Layoffs ensue.

2016: Hope, of FF XIII, gets his own spinoff title. Vows to be annoying as shit for another 60 hours. Layoffs ensue.

2017: (company restructuring)

2018: Announcement of Lightning's second trilogy.

2019: Announcement of Hope's tentative first trilogy.

2020: ...

2021: ...

2022: (bankruptcy filings commence)

2023: Valve buys company.

2024: Final Fantasy XV: Anime Hat Classic announced.

Sorry man. Guess we're out of luck.