That's a progress bar 1/8th full after 30 minutes—a four-hour process at this rate—for the Wii U's infamous firmware update, said to be 5 gigabytes (according to Geoff Keighley of GameTrailers TV, and repeated by numerous others). Sony, you are officially off the hook with the PS3's interminable, poorly timed and mandatory system updates.

It's not like Nintendo's just fixing typoes in the help file, either. This update lets you access online features, transfer data from a Wii, visit the Miiverse and use other online features. So, basically, you're bringing home an unassembled bicycle, and depending on your Internet connection speed, it could be between 1 and 4 hours before that battle station is fully operational. Expect this story to resurface again around Christmas morning.


When it does, expect it to bubble up where it did last night: Twitter, everyone's forum of first resort for complaining. We've collected some voices of frustration for your information and amusement, beginning with the person who supplied that picture above, @LouisLamarche

Fun fact, Louis, the San Andreas Fault slipped 0.17 millimeters in the time this update took.

This was the big scandal kicking off the topic. Ben Fritz writes for the L.A. Times. His update was so slow, evidently he thought his machine had frozen, so he shut it off. It's now completely inoperable, unless there's a recovery mode. Yes, that raises the question of what happens if the power goes out in the four-hour span of a Wii U firmware update. My advice: get a UPS and don't update during a hurricane.

Make that three, Ben.

Make that three, Julien.

Good thing they're not sharing this conversation over Miiverse. Oh, that's right, nron10 can't access Miiverse yet.

This guy obviously has a white Wii U. I hate to say it, my friend, but this is your answer, and it probably explains why NintendoLand is not offered to basic model owners.

Don't know how this guy is pegging it at 4.7GB—there seems to be no way to expose how big the firmware update is. But most Tweets put the size of this monster at 5 GB.

Your campout begins when you get home, @comet5o4.

Yeah, try talking to @LouisLamarche. Compared to you, he's getting 0s and 1s by carrier pigeon.

Yeah, well, that'll be me, whenever my machine arrives from Toys 'R Us.

(Top image by @LouisLamarche)