I have always wanted to be a Booth Babe and I honestly can't give you a real reason why, except for that I like to dress up and pose in ways that can't possibly help my scoliosis.

It seems that many gaming-related websites, especially ones on the Internet, have discussed the issue of Booth Babes – should they be banned, should they not be banned, is prosciutto an acceptable form of clothing, etc. Personally, I'm all for Booth Babes. The more, the better! Contrary to popular belief, not every Booth Babe I've encountered has the same Scholastic Aptitude Test score as mayonnaise – some actually know the title of the game their representing! Ha ha! But seriously, I commend these women. I can barely remember how to form sentences when wearing 6-inch heels and tight clothing for upwards of eight hours, so the fact that many of them have proved to be intelligent is downright impressive.

The booths at E3 2010 provided attendees with eye candy as expected, but the outfits were slightly disappointing. Many girls were dressed in boring tank tops and hot pants, as opposed to donning full costumes from their booth's game. This is a shame, since I think Booth Babes are an awesome opportunity to take cosplay to the next level by using females in fantastic costumes to pique interest and sell games.

But enough serious stuff, let's examine my favorite hired hotties of E3 2010! Now with colorful commentary!

I saw these warrior girls in front of the Magic: The Gathering Tactics booth, but I'm pretty sure they were there for Kirby's Epic Yarn. Aside from the fact that the girl in the blue is holding her weapon with the same facial expression I would have if someone handed me a box of pig bladders, I like these costumes. Not sure how they would hold up in battle, however.

Score: 6

I can get behind these Nyko costumes because, let's face it: this is the future. This is the kind of outfit we are going to be wearing while sitting in our flying cars eating push-pop sushi, listening to "Super Sprode," and playing with our 3DSs which double as time machines.

Score: 7

Joke's on you! This isn't a booth "babe" at all! I just wanted to make sure you had trouble sleeping tonight! This is either F.E.A.R. 3's Alma ready to pop or Alanis Morissette needs to get to rehab immediately.


Score: 8, because if I rate it any lower, Alma might show up at the top of the next ladder I climb.

I loved the Forsaken World costumes because, like Alma, these ladies are dressed up as characters from the game. These outfits were elaborate, shiny, and probably very, very uncomfortable – all the ingredients that equal a great costume. Check out work-in-progress photos at the Perfect World website!

Score: 9.5

The Mafia II Booth Babes certainly accomplished the 1940's pin-up look they were going for, but lose points because those guns on the left are clearly fake. Come on, girls, I thought we were going for authenticity!

Score: 7

And finally, my favorite Booth Babe (and Booth… Bob?) of E3 2010: the Zombies from Dead Rising 2. The girl was occasionally taken out of her cage on a chain leash and paraded around the expo where she tried to bite off peoples' faces. However, I started to doubt she was a real zombie when I noticed her ratio of growling to moaning was slightly off. I wanted Cliff Bleszinski to Lancer her in half just to be sure, but he was too busy mingling. So. You'll know whom to blame if she starts the apocalypse.

Score: 10

I mentioned to Brian Crecente that I wanted to be a Booth Babe just once, for the experience. He reacted as though I instead told him I was going to cheese-grate my tongue. But I could be an awesome Booth Babe, the kind that actually knows what she's talking about and cares deeply about distributing pamphlets. Or maybe I'll cheese-grate my tongue. I'm always up for new experiences!