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What’s the Internet rule number for everything eventually becoming a body pillow?

Reddit user Red_Cheddarz posted this pic, purporting that a (potentially ill-advised) friend liberated this delightful curiosity from a local thrift store. Now hopefully begins his epic quest to determine who had the wherewithal to turn Sanic Hegehog into a body pillow, and much more importantly, why they would play God.

Of course, Redditors in the thread have their own theories: mainly that the creator wanted to have sex with it. Wash your hands, buddy.