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40+ Weird Vintage Video Game Ads We Can’t Stop Thinking About

40+ Weird Vintage Video Game Ads We Can’t Stop Thinking About

Sony, Microsoft, Nintendo, and other big-name game publishers spent decades creating nightmare fuel

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Men create molds of heads from flesh-colored putty in a surreal PS2 ad.
Image: Sony Interactive Entertainment

For a long time, perhaps due to the infancy of the medium, there was no “right” way to advertise home video games. As a result, some of the earliest video game companies—including some we now recognize as major industry players, like Nintendo—ended up creating some of the most bizarre TV commercials, print ads, and odd commemorative condoms known to civilization.

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Video game ads became especially perplexing in the early 2000s, when ‘80s babies were old enough to have warm and fuzzy memories of Super Mario Bros. As a result, video game studios didn’t need to try as hard to recruit consumers, like Sega did in one “I want you for Sega Master System” kind of TV spot back in 1986. Techno-utopianism was also the 2000s’ core aesthetic belief (as it is, again, today). All companies needed to do was cut through the noise of *NSYNC and butterfly-shaped hair clips and remind you that video games also existed.

“In no other form of society in history has there been such a concentration of images, such a density of visual messages,” art critic John Berger wrote about advertising in his formative, and perennially relevant, 1972 book “Ways of Seeing.” “One may remember or forget these messages but briefly one takes them in, and for a moment they stimulate the imagination by way of either memory or expectation.”

Video game companies wanted to extend that moment with you. They wanted you to see their products as essential but otherworldly, like the health elixirs and obedient dragons that lived inside them.

Scaring the shit out of you was one easy way to do that. If a video game was like lucid dreaming, a video game ad could be like sleepwalking through a black hole. So in 2002, Microsoft tried to earn its then one-year-old Xbox a reputation for memorable advertising, and it worked. That year, the BBC received 136 complaints about an original Xbox ad showing a screeching, freshly delivered baby careening across the galaxy toward its future as a dead old man, ultimately slamming into its grave.

“Life Is Short,” the ad instructed. “Play More.” (“It’s so crass it’s profound,” journalist Rob Walker wrote in Slate at the time).

By the time the PlayStation 3 rolled out in 2006, Sony’s brand was also synonymous with bizarre and even offensive advertising. “Disturbing Playstation Ad Will Put You Off Video Games Forever,” declared one Gawker headline in 2008. “Let me try to paint a verbal picture for you: It’s a guy with a thumb for a penis,” Hamilton Nolan wrote.

Yeah, they really went for it. But unorthodox advertising helped establish games as a lucrative and artistic industry.

The now-$384 billion global video game industry has, for the most part, overgrown its need for Lynchian magazine campaigns and high shock value. We have Twitch streamers for that.

Aspects of weird video game ads live on in antagonistic social media “brand” accounts, but the mainstream video game industry is currently a serious adult. It wears button-downs and acts like it can’t remember its more eccentric days. But a lot of the ads it created decades ago are too strange to forget—that was the whole point of them.

Here are some of our favorites.

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2 / 47

ColecoVision-era Donkey Kong will steal your wife (1982)

ColecoVision-era Donkey Kong will steal your wife (1982)

Nintendo
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3 / 47

Intellivision made an informative newscast (1982)

Intellivision made an informative newscast (1982)

Mattel
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Witness these nerds’ Legend of Zelda rap (1986) 

Witness these nerds’ Legend of Zelda rap (1986) 

Nintendo
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The Legend of Zelda also infected this man’s mind (1986)

The Legend of Zelda also infected this man’s mind (1986)

Nintendo
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A Link to the Past spawned this flashmob (1991)

A Link to the Past spawned this flashmob (1991)

Nintendo
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7 / 47

“MORTAL KOMBAT!” (1993)

“MORTAL KOMBAT!” (1993)

Midway / Acclaim
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8 / 47

Resident Evil’s first remake created broken homes (2002)

Resident Evil’s first remake created broken homes (2002)

A man hangs his head in his hands in his bedroom while his son comforts him in a Resident Evil ad.
Image: Capcom
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9 / 47

Sonic R is scaring me (1997)

Sonic R is scaring me (1997)

Sega
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10 / 47

Majora’s Mask descends (2000)

Majora’s Mask descends (2000)

Nintendo
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11 / 47

He deserved it (2001)

He deserved it (2001)

Capcom
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12 / 47

Super Mario Sunshine is for the children (2002)

Super Mario Sunshine is for the children (2002)

Nintendo
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13 / 47

Kirby looks different here (1995)

Kirby looks different here (1995)

Kirby frowns in a mugshot.
Image: Nintendo
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Save him...from himself (2002)

Save him...from himself (2002)

A Game Boy ad instructs on how to save Kirby from choking.
Image: Nintendo
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15 / 47

Show this Dragon Ball Z ad to your hair stylist (2003)

Show this Dragon Ball Z ad to your hair stylist (2003)

A man with pointy hair grimaces in this Dragon Ball Z ad.
Image: Webfoot Technologies
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16 / 47

Please avert your gaze, Rayman (2003)

Please avert your gaze, Rayman (2003)

Rayman pees at a urinal while other men stare.
Image: Ubisoft
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17 / 47

Words to live by (late 1990s)

Words to live by (late 1990s)

A 3dfx ad shows a CRT TV screen with the words "There are two kinds of gamers in this world. The ones who still play on consoles. And the ones who've actually seen breasts."
Image: 3dfx
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Sega? Are you mad at me? (1989) 

Sega? Are you mad at me? (1989) 

Sega
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This Atari ad features a man wearing a centipede head (1983)

This Atari ad features a man wearing a centipede head (1983)

Atari
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This Atari ad features a man wearing an eagle head (1983)

This Atari ad features a man wearing an eagle head (1983)

Atari
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And this Atari 2600 sounds really smug when it uses the word “skidmarks” (1982)

And this Atari 2600 sounds really smug when it uses the word “skidmarks” (1982)

Atari / Namco
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Atari 2600 makes a menacing promise here (1983)

Atari 2600 makes a menacing promise here (1983)

Atari
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Atari has a grave warning for home console buyers (1983)

Atari has a grave warning for home console buyers (1983)

Atari
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Is the NES threatening me? (late 1980s)

Is the NES threatening me? (late 1980s)

Nintendo
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I’d really hope so (mid-1990s)

I’d really hope so (mid-1990s)

A Game Boy ad with a grinning boy holding a console says "Game Boy. More fun than a ferret down your trousers."
Image: Nintendo
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The Super Nintendo really impresses Paul Rudd (1992)

The Super Nintendo really impresses Paul Rudd (1992)

Nintendo
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This is great to know (late 1990s)

This is great to know (late 1990s)

An N64 ad showing a man's torso in black and white says "my stick is pure joy!"
Image: Nintendo
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28 / 47

I’ve always wanted to GameCube from the toilet (2002)

I’ve always wanted to GameCube from the toilet (2002)

Nintendo
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29 / 47

Put that thing away (2004)

Put that thing away (2004)

A Super Mario ad shows a finger transformed into a piranha plant.
Image: Nintendo
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30 / 47

Nintendo leads a mouse to sin (2005)

Nintendo leads a mouse to sin (2005)

Nintendo
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31 / 47

Oh my God (late 1990s)

Oh my God (late 1990s)

Sony
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This PlayStation “dealer” ad is complete with tearable rolling paper (late 1990s)

This PlayStation “dealer” ad is complete with tearable rolling paper (late 1990s)

A man in the shadows offers up a PlayStation controller.
Image: Sony / crackunit
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PlayStation dabbles in brainwashing (1995)

PlayStation dabbles in brainwashing (1995)

Sony
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34 / 47

Watch out… (1996)

Watch out… (1996)

A PlayStation ad says it's "more powerful than God."
Image: Sony
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35 / 47

Um, sure! (1997)

Um, sure! (1997)

An EagleMax ad shows a boy covered in white goo.
Image: Act Labs
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36 / 47

Sony shares its vision of the future (1999)

Sony shares its vision of the future (1999)

Sony
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37 / 47

PlayStation inspires mental wealth (1999)

PlayStation inspires mental wealth (1999)

Sony
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38 / 47

Stop that! (early 2000s) 

Stop that! (early 2000s) 

A man in a PS2 ad sniffs PlayStation button-shaped underwear.
Image: Sony
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39 / 47

Thanks, PlayStation (early 2000s)

Thanks, PlayStation (early 2000s)

A PS2 ad shows button-shaped condoms and warns players to "be careful."
Image: Sony
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40 / 47

This is what happens if you leave your contacts in for too long (early 2000s)

This is what happens if you leave your contacts in for too long (early 2000s)

A PS2 ad shows button symbols burned on a woman's eyeball.
Image: Sony
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41 / 47

I’m not sure what this one is (early 2000s)

I’m not sure what this one is (early 2000s)

A woman pulls off a skin-colored shirt to reveal red muscle in this PS2 ad.
Image: Sony
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The PS2, by David Lynch (yes, really) (2000)

The PS2, by David Lynch (yes, really) (2000)

Sony
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43 / 47

The PS3 baby is here (2006)

The PS3 baby is here (2006)

Sony
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44 / 47

Sorry I can’t be her (2012)

Sorry I can’t be her (2012)

A PS Vita ad shows a woman with breasts on her back and front.
Image: Sony
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45 / 47

These mosquitoes are starving for Xbox (early 2000s)

These mosquitoes are starving for Xbox (early 2000s)

Microsoft
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46 / 47

The Xbox orb is sending me messages (2001)

The Xbox orb is sending me messages (2001)

Microsoft

What are your favorite freaky video game ads? Are you now too afraid to close your eyes? Let me know in the comments.

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