Asshole Dog Shoots Duck Hunter

For more than 25 years, one of the constant laws of nature—like the speed of light—is the fact a duck hunt dog cannot be shot. Nothing, however, prevents the dog from shooting someone else, as a Utah man learned this past weekend.

Robert Cottingham had 27 shotgun pellets removed from his buttocks after his buddy's asshole dog jumped on a shotgun resting on the bow of the hunting party's boat and discharged it. Cottingham was wounded as he was attending to duck decoys in a marshy area. Cottingham was treated at and released from a local hospital.

Reached for comment, the dog gave a high pitched snicker into his left paw. Cottingham refused to comment to a TV newsman preparing a segment for that evening's report. Cottingham presumably watched that while firing away, impotently, at the dog on his television screen.

Dog shoots Utah hunter in the butt — with his own gun [Los Angeles Times, h/t PoweredByHentai]