Kotaku Originals: Up Your Nose With a Rubber HoseS

Kinda presumptuous to welcome myself back, but, I don't see anyone else doing it. Anyway, it's nice to be missed. I was missed, right?

This week was Resident Evil 5's big closeup, but others still managed to crack the news lineup. Namely, BioShock 2's Big Sister stomped on in and said, where you saw but one set of footprints in the sand, it was there that I kicked your ass. All that and more from the week in original readin', ritin' and reportin':

Reviews, Previews and Impressions
Resident Evil 5 Review: A Mutation of Fun
Frankenreview: Resident Evil 5
Frankenreview: Resistance: Retribution
Burn Zombie Burn!: It Is What It Sounds Like
Peggle XBLA Review: Extreme Fever!!!
Impressions: Wildstorm's Resident Evil Comic Book
Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon Review: Party On, Marth

Features
Clash of the Gaming Titans
Ten Plus Spots Gamers Should Visit In Japan
The Art of War

Big Sisters
First Image of BioShock 2's Big Sister
Big Sisters Stalk Onto BioShock 2

Zombies
Resident Evil 5 Infects San Francisco
Meet Resident Evil 5 Producer
Postcards From the Zombie Apocalypse
Russian Dolls 4 Dead

Apparel
Coop, Soto, Kofie Art Appear in Midnight Club, On Shirts
Katamari Damacy Gets Ported To Nike Dunks

News
Another Country Gets Club Nintendo
The Secret To CCP's Success
A Glimpse At The New Game From Castle Crashers Dev
First Professor Layton Anime Trailers

Numbers
British Sales Charts

Fun Stuff
Resistance: Retribution Poster Details Collapse of Eiffel Tower
Castlevania Cake
What Game Weaponry Does This Toy Rip-Off?

Promotion d'Individu sans Honte
Bashcraft Penned Arcade Book Getting French Edition

Sweaty Men Cursing
Hothead John McEnroe In Grand Slam Tennis
When Do You Pack Up Your Games?