Remember the official Pokémon reggae song that was released last year in Japanese? Today, it was translated/tweaked so that it’s in English—which means we can take a closer look at the lyrics. And, well...they’re kind of uncomfortable!

Let me preface this by saying that we all know that people eat Pokemon. That’s just a fact. In Pokemon Gold & Silver, there’s an entire segment about a Team Rocket operation that cuts off the tails of Slowpoke and then tries to sell them for a hefty sum.

The reggae song has references to this practice within the lyrics (emphasis mine):

Slow slow slow

Ah-oo what’s your story, Slowpoke?

Slow slow slow

Ah-oo what’s your story, Slowpoke?

Every night, you’re the one

Dreams of waking with the sun

But you sleep in ‘til noon (Slowpoke)

Your pink hue

Is your color, through and through

I can see it’s the real you (Slowpoke)

Your big mouth

Like a supermarket door

Open seven/twenty-four (Slowpoke)

Your sweet tail sap

Is a yummy yummy snack

We’re hungry and we want more

(Slowpoke)

You’re so slow, that

Your picture never blurs

The speedometer concurs

(Slowpoke)

Slow slow slow

Ah-oo what’s your story, Slowpoke?

Slow slow slow

Ah-oo what’s your story, Slowpoke?

Lose your tail, that’s all right

It’ll grow back someday

That’s really cool (Slowpoke)

Dopey Pokémon, the

Category they settled on

Too bad for you (Slowpoke)

What word starts with “S”

And ends with letter “E”?

It’s obviously…(Sunstroke)

You fish with your tail

But you’re too slow when they bite

And so they swim out of sight (Slowpoke)

Your slow-motion roll has got a lot of soul

It’s your cruise control

(Slowpoke!)

Slow slow slow

Ah-oo what’s your story, Slowpoke?

Slow slow slow

Ah-oo what’s your story, Slowpoke?

You yawn a single time

Down comes the rain sublime

If the famous legend is true

But you’ve been yawning all day long

And the blue skies aren’t gone

You’ve got some explaining to do

A Shellder bites your tail

And then you become a Slowbro

That’s a dopey evolution (Slowpoke)

Everywhere you go

There are Slowpoke passing through

Maybe there’s one right behind you (Slowpoke)

Plodding, poky,

sluggish, tardy,

so late you’re early (Slowpoke)

Slow slow slow

Dude, what’s your deal, Slowpoke?

Slow slow slow

Ah-oo what’s your story, Slowpoke?

A great big Berry fell

Bonked you on the head

But you feel no pain (Slowpoke)

Your ears curl in—there’s a reason, you said

What was it again? (Slowpoke)

You just said “SLO”

Did you feel that Berry only just now?

You’re really somethin’ (Slowpoke)

Someday you’ll be Slowbro, or maybe even Slowking

Or you’ll just keep bein’ (Slowpoke)

Stand in a ring

Bite your buddy’s tail for lunch

What a happy looking bunch

Slowpoke!

Slow slow slow

Ah-oo what’s your story, Slowpoke?

Slow slow slow

Slowpoke!

It’s all in good fun, and it’s even consistent with the lore, but man: I’d really rather not think about eating my monster pals, you know? The worst part is when I start to analyze the situation here, because the lyrics suggest that Slowpoke actually doesn’t feel much pain. Plus, it’ll grow the tail back, right?

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Ugh. It’s still kind of weird. I kind of get the feeling that it’s more OK to joke about eating Slowpoke because it’s one of the not-so-smart Pokemon, which in of itself is fucked up!

YES I KNOW THEY’RE NOT REAL I DON’T GIVE A SHIT

SAVE SLOWPOKES 2015