Just got back from five days away on assignment. Is anyone else weirded out by how their home smells different upon returning from a trip? Like, "Holy Toledo, does it smell like that to visitors?"

This time, however, I'm pretty sure the weird aroma was not of my own making. It's largely attributable to the Tootsie Roll my cat left on the dining table in the back room out of spite. At least, I hope it is.

  • Speaking of bad smells: Here's the "Better Marriage Blanket," which promises to neutralize your farting partner's undercover stench, though it cannot ventilate the heat from said dutch oven.
  • Speaking of birth control methods: Today is the 50th anniversary of The Pill, a pharmaceutical that managed to transform modern sexuality without once being hawked in a spam e-mail message.
  • Speaking of the Dutch: American guy washes his hands in a trough-style urinal at some outdoor event in the Netherlands, set up outside the port-a-potty arcade in which he'd taken a leak. This has got to be a total set up, as many stateside stadium pissers resemble this one. But even if it is intentional, that dude totally rinsed in No. 1 and scrubbed with a urinal cake.