DarkView

There a few books like that in Oblivion. Try reading the entire The Real Barenziah series. A lot of dirty stuff in there, including drug use. Think how awesome you could make the next Elder Scrolls game with Next Gen graphics if it had some tasteful brief nudity and romance, Like in Mass Effect?

Spectre_J

cats_pajamas

cybereality

Being Tidus and always wanting to get in to Yunas Summoner dress, even though you would disappear half way through the act having it all be a dream.

Go Team Venture

Dee4leeds

Knukleur

CoconutSport

There's even a book called "The Lusty Argonian Maid" which contains nothing but cheap innuendo! Come on, Bethesda! At least tell me you're going to make things more interesting in Fallout 3....

17-A

killr_klown

AplusBminus

paperthin0

What are the 2 rare games? And FF7 just kinda makes sense....so....what points were proven? Just curious.

paperthin0

Silent Predator

YUYU

YUYU

Spoony Bard

Did you READ the article????

Sigh.

Anyways, I present the promise of this commercial, and the end result of playing through Perfect Dark and NO SEXY BEHAVIOUR WHATSOVER.

+ Watch video

Spoony Bard

Sabre_Justice: Okay, no more long name.

swordfish2eva1

Carnok

As a boy of 13 when that game came out...AMEN

jisf0rjosh

"I'm Sorry But Your Princess Is In Another Castle."

After going through green and red shelled snapping turtles, some that can fly, A cloud guy throwing spiny living creatures at you, Walking Mushrooms of death, Brothers throwing Hammers at you, Bullets With EYES!!, Various Aquatic Life while holding your breath for 3 minutes, Lava, Fireballs, and a Half Dragon Half Dinosaur that breaths fire and throws hammers.... You find out you arent getting the girl... Nope all you got a is a talking mushroom boy.

If thats not bad enough it doesnt happen once... nope it happens 7 TIMES!!! Then if you are playing the SNES version what do you get for your troubles. A Kiss on the check. Thanx Princess, next time you save yourself.

ShaggyB

Pretty funny list, even if I do hate the make-each-item-a-separate-page publication standard. Yes, I know the reasons, I still think it's dumb.

tk.

I remember when DOA:XBV first came out on Xbox, and EGM put a cheat in their magazine to get a topless mode, and it was incredibly hard...Then it just turned out to be an April Fools joke. I was thoroughly upset.

PowdrdMilkMan

clintonskneecap

Sora fights all the way across an entire fucking dying galaxy, saving whole planets from the heartless, kicking enormous amounts of ass, bludgeoning enormous bosses and Disney villains to death with a large key, all to be reunited with Kairi.

So what does he get towards the end of kingdom hearts TWO when he is finally reunited with her in a substantial form?

A fucking HUG! Not even a peck on the cheek!

Dauragon C. Mikado

Oyn

First off this midget that rode you around the entire game turns out to be one hot Princess, and you save another Princess while being accompanied by the other. Then you totally get tossed aside by both of them. Not to mention your childhood friend you run around after is more into your horse than you.

voidbringer

I can only imagine that this timeline is infinitely more convoluted than the worst nightmares of Capcom's RE writers.

JustThisGuy

sn1per420

Takuthehedgehog

Tob3z

Jessie of Dead Rising.
No, there wasn't much of a relationship there, but look: buff manly man, hot power-suit authority figure, mall full of zombies signifying certain death. If that's not the perfect scenario to get one last busy on, I don't know what is.

dunetiger reads kotaku, seems pleased

Leon-G

After playing Crisis Core, however, I like her a whole lot more.
Her flirtatious banter with Zack was one of the highlights of the game, and made me sad about her death in retrospect (is it still retrospect if the game itself came after but its story took place before?)

@Ndogg550: Those of us across the pond got to see Carla Valenti's naughty bits in the final sex scene, thus that particular blue ball moment can only apply to North-American gamers. Now, a shower scene that stuck was that from Parasite Eve II.

Antiterra

directhex

XvCowboyvX

Eltigro

Krytha

Green-clad Gamer Dude

Knights of the Old Republic: Bastilla. God how I would tap that...

Sonic_and_Tails

@Owen Good: GTA prior to IV was a lot of blue ball

FP ph15h

AKA: Fahrenheit for those of you with blue balls across the pond

Ndogg550

...What? Sounds to me like you've never played Pokemon Pearl.

butterladle

ShaggE

SuedeGopher

Then again, don't think that Cloud is emotionally stable or confidant enough to do anything with anyone. o_o

Saint Anima

The Rage

SubZippo

Thorax

Double J

Snake didn't seal shit. He got knocked out by the wine before his pants had the opportunity to come off.

BlackDove

Thorax