Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis - Kotaku Comments

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

GlockEH — Sun, 20 Jan 2008 00:23:52 MST

Like his reviews, although I was scared of him and his team at a 48 hour game competition.

He did the intro for his teams' game and yes it was zero punctuation.

GlockEH

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

taftsearlobe23 — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 08:20:52 MST

@dowingba: you forgot if a game doesn't have black people in it then its also raciest

taftsearlobe23

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

neojam — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 15:49:50 MST

This guy is a genius!!
Loved the whole coma-DOGfight-thing, so damn spot on!

neojam

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Cpryd001 — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 11:13:43 MST

That was pretty funny. And here, I thought he was running out of steam.

Cpryd001

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

joelface — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 02:50:48 MST

lol.. this guys a comedic genius. i loved his review of the heavenly sword demo.. RIGHT on the money.

i especially love the negativity that he uses even on games he loves (with the rare exception of portal - but that was understandable of course)...

rofl. i've been watching his reviews for the last few days. very funny stuff.

joelface

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

SAGA — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 01:32:33 MST

Yahtzee rules, I especially like how he doesent attach an arbitrary number. It's either "total shit" or "not shit"

SAGA

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

mind in rewind — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 01:18:47 MST

@Chuco27: He always uses great music. I don't think he's used anything I haven't heard, though.

mind in rewind

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Quebeley — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 00:51:38 MST

He's the reason why Wednesdays are no longer just the middle of the freaking week.

Quebeley

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

HOVA — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 00:40:01 MST

he's back.

HOVA

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Kortir — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 23:57:52 MST

"the episode where he finally loses it and simple says the word "cock" over and over again for three minutes using all sorts of tonal modulations while his adorable little stick figure avatar sits in the corner of the screen and cries."

I totally want him to make this, now. XD

Kortir

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

unmarkedone — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 23:55:24 MST

Best part is where he's talking about how pretty the inside of the ship is and he wants to bash it but he can't. Win.

unmarkedone

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Samos42 — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 22:45:55 MST

I look forward to these every week. It's going to be sad when he gets picked up by some game company and he can't do these but until then...

Samos42

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

The Red Comet — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 21:19:00 MST

Ah, this was a great review. I'm glad someone else sees Psycho as basically Jason Statham in a nanosuit.

The Red Comet

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

thereturnoftheufo — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 21:18:19 MST

@Alith: Oh stfu. All his reviews are the same amount of epicness. It's the same guy with the same wit each time. Neither of them are an abomination, you're just a picky little baby.

thereturnoftheufo

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

fenderfuel08 — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 21:14:23 MST

He's right about the vehicle controls. They are the worst vehicle controls I have ever seen in a videogame...not an exageration, they are the worst.

The part he mentions where you have to fly the chopper/airplane was the closest I got to crying while playing a videogame. You'll die over and over and over again due to the broken controls...until you discover your aim is the most accurate while you are turning. The technique is flying towards enemies, turning away from them as you get close and then shooting as you turn. Thats how broken the controls are!

fenderfuel08

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

lgndk11r — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 20:52:23 MST

Monoliths constructed from magical obsidian? Meh, that's yesterday's news.

lgndk11r

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Tricon — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 20:50:22 MST

Ah! Brilliant episode! I got every single reference, which means its instantly good to me

Tricon

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

TiberianViper — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 20:22:31 MST

i dunno about the rest of you, but yahtzee gives my computer an erection... ok, me too.

shutup.

TiberianViper

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

djcoffee — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:37:06 MST

while most game reviewers are busy getting all fancy shmancy with their game reviews, Yahtzee gives it to you straight. we need more game reviews like this!

djcoffee

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Hypersteric — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:35:46 MST

@Hitokage: ...that's not ironic! That's not ironic, at all! [/joke]

Congrats, though, that's a beast of a machine, and you should definitely be able to run Crysis on Medium. :P

As for Yahtzee, good review as always, though slightly less funny than previous installments.

Hypersteric

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

xat — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:25:48 MST

Anyone with a capable system and a taste for FPSs should go ahead and try out Crysis; it's the best FPS gaming has had to offer in a *very* long time. The first half anyway. Yahtzee is right - the vehicles were almost completely useless.

I liked the Jesus Chryst Superstar bit myself. :)

Oh and for anyone who has already beaten crysis, try it again except don't kill anyone (unless absolutely necessary). There are only a few parts where you actually have to kill people; the rest can be done with some careful sneaking.

xat

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

boopadoo — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:23:24 MST

Zero Punctuation always gives me a brain boner.

See, bitchy game review journalists, this is how you do it right! Sure the games he review have been out for weeks, even months (Super Paper Mario), but Yahtzee's reviews are always spit-take funny, spot-on accurate...and give the aforementioned boner.

boopadoo

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Bokusatsu_Tenshi — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:23:11 MST

Freaking great as always.
Yahtzee is the one reason to smile even when crappy games comes out.

Bokusatsu_Tenshi

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Cell9song — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:19:58 MST

To me, the mark of a good reviewer is that if he shreds a game that you enjoy but you can still agree on his points then he's doing something right. Yahtzee does this
every.
single.
time.

Cell9song

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Chuco — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:02:19 MST

Anyone else find themselves looking for the songs that he uses as intro's and outro's after watching the reviews? o.O

Chuco

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

psycoking — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 18:54:21 MST

Asian stick figures with slanty eyes...
You gotta love Yahtzee Croshaw.

psycoking

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Solaris79 — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 18:52:00 MST

::golf clap::

Carry on then!

Solaris79

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

NitrousO — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 18:39:48 MST

I wasnt laughing much at his earlier reviews but this one was absolutley great. Laughed the whole way through.

NitrousO

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Alith — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 17:58:55 MST

Yay, he's redeemed himself after the abomination that was the SMG review!

And I liked Crysis too. I put it on hold though until nvidia release a new flagship card because nothing can play this at DX10 settings with playable framerates yet and I don't want to spoil it.

Alith

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Wokcus — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 17:42:56 MST

@dowingba: Not only that, but if you didn't make any games with blacks in them that would be racist as well. So, basically we can conclude that the game industry is racist no matter what it does.

Wokcus

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Sabre_Justice: Okay, no more long name. — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 17:19:18 MST

@dowingba: Actually it's Koreans. I think.

I played the demo version and it's pretty much like that. Invisibility breaks the game, cars are GTA bombs waiting to go off and everything is beautiful. It's a shame he didn't mention the brilliant physics that allow you to throw all kinds of things at your enemies if you don't feel like shooting them.

Sabre_Justice: Okay, no more long name.

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

pedantic_dandy — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 17:10:26 MST

@RadiantSilvergun: Even "El Scorcho"?

pedantic_dandy

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Huxle — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:53:44 MST

Pure gold

Huxle

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

geekgrrl — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:41:25 MST

@dowingba: touché. jesse jackson would be proud.

geekgrrl

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:39:45 MST

Is it me or do these just keep getting better? I mean Columbo, genius shit! I can't wait til he pulls the Beretta card!

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

dowingba — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:31:36 MST

RE5 is racist because you kill black people. San Andreas was racist because you play a black person. Basically, if a game has any black people in it, it's automatically racist.

dowingba

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

The old Campion — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:29:41 MST

...the episode where he finally loses it and simple says the word "cock" over and over again for three minutes using all sorts of tonal modulations while his adorable little stick figure avatar sits in the corner of the screen and cries.

You can't picture that in your mind for longer than ten or fifteen seconds without laughing, I've tried quite a few times.

The old Campion

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Skylance — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:25:20 MST

@kelptocratic:

Not really. The performance difference is negligible at best unless you're at crazy high resolution (1920 x whatever and up) with AA and AF turned all the way up. The 8800GTs are a deal and a half, man. Ridiculously powerful performance for the money. I've got just one 8800GT, a Core Duo 6420, and I run Crysis with everything on high without a hitch (Read: 30 to 40 fps at 1680x1050. No AA.)

Skylance

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Lake Somerset — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:16:27 MST

I hate Weezer.

Lake Somerset

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

kw4k — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 15:40:02 MST

i just love how informative their reviews are. nowhere else do i find a site with reviews that articulate and descriptive

kw4k

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

dv8godd — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 15:34:27 MST

Great... now I'm reminded that I have to start buying Columbo seasons on DVD. I used to love that show.

dv8godd

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

mind in rewind — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 15:34:03 MST

Dance Commander = win

mind in rewind

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

pedantic_dandy — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 15:33:22 MST

@Morigato: I was Gaybraham for Halloween. Oh the shame..

pedantic_dandy

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Marv2 — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 15:25:10 MST

I wish Columbo was my dad

Marv2

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

mikecoscia — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 15:17:52 MST

Hahah, love it.

mikecoscia

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Len Bias Cocaine Surplus — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 15:11:34 MST

The Super Mario Galaxy one was better.

Len Bias Cocaine Surplus

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

SSJPabs — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 14:56:28 MST

The last couple ZPs just lacked something, but this one brings it back. Pretty good.

SSJPabs

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

symphony_of_the_night — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 14:49:44 MST

@Witzbold: i think he talks about racism because in farcry all the characters were white if i remember corectly....maybe?

symphony_of_the_night

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

aelfin — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 14:25:21 MST

Oooh, I liked that episode a lot.

aelfin

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Laenir — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 14:23:50 MST

@kelptocratic: There's a table comparing the different 8800 cards here: [www.nvidia.com]

Laenir

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Kyle81 — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 14:18:51 MST

@kylenalepa: Yup, the vehicles actually made the game easy. I also loved the flight section with the dog fighting, had great fun with it.

Kyle81

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

FrigidAir44 — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 14:17:10 MST

@kelptocratic: Yes. GTS I believe has a faster CPU/memory and better cooling.

As for Crysis, he is right on the money as far as the game goes. It's an amazing show piece for a new fancy pants computer. The graphics and gameplay/AI are top notch. The vehicle scenes are a pain in the ass too, they do kinda drive funny. If I didn't have to drive, I hoofed it.

The story is meh. You are playing this game for eye candy, not for its brilliant narrative.

FrigidAir44

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

TheNocturnalSun — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 14:15:39 MST

I WANA BE A DANCE COMMANDER! GO E6!!!

TheNocturnalSun

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

kylenalepa — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 14:00:10 MST

I gotta disagree with Yahtzee on the vehical sections; I thought, for the most part, they controlled just fine, and regularly used the Humvees with the mounted machine guns to cut through enemies like a hot knife through butter.

kylenalepa

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

mariospants — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:48:41 MST

I loved Far Cry so much I played throught the entire Wii version. That's how much I love Far Cry.

mariospants

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

okenny :) ...building bridges (to hide under) — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:47:33 MST

@Witzbold: Hat he said is easily misunderstood but your statement is more-so inflammatory. He wasn't talking about Far Cry 2; he was definately talking about Crysis. Hopefully this is a misunderstanding on your part because I'm not liking what it implies which is people only speak of racism when Africans are involved. Zero punctuation was being (tongue and cheek I think) sympathetic to the fact that only North Koreans were the human enemies in the game and how the game stacked the odds in your favor as far as weapons are concerned.

okenny :) ...building bridges (to hide under)

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

The Vampire Raziel — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:44:07 MST

i must meet this man for he makes 2001, Evil Dead, Jason, Freddy, Jason Vs Freddy connections....

The Vampire Raziel

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Maiken — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:34:32 MST

Im surprised he didn't crap all over this game, since he usually dose.

Maiken

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Witzbold — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:31:25 MST

@Ghede: He passed it out of the wrong end in that video. ;D

Witzbold

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

MinkOWar — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:31:15 MST

I loved the flying dropship section!

I just wish the ship were a pelican :(

Or a Catalina... Why don't games have pilotable PBY Catalinas in them?

MinkOWar

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Vegan Shinigami — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:30:52 MST

@Hitokage:

AH!! LUCKY!

Ps <3's to Ben from a fellow Ben

Vegan Shinigami

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Ghede — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:11:03 MST

I love the line "Uncomfortable Kidney Stone."

I leave it to you to decipher why. First person to do so wins a cookie. Second person wins a kidney stone.

Ghede

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

cactushooker — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:07:20 MST

Wow. Guy makes Evil Dead AND 2001 references. Why aren't we, like, best friends?

cactushooker

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Witzbold — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:06:00 MST

@Ninja-Z: Agreed. That was fucking brilliant.

Witzbold

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Ninja-Z — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:03:11 MST

"Jesus Cryst Superstar."

That just about made the video for me.

Ninja-Z

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Reneg — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:00:17 MST

hetero? weak sauce.

Reneg

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

ShaggE — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:58:24 MST

@JustThisGuy: "Hands Resist Him", by Bill Stoneham.

ShaggE

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

indiemike — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:49:30 MST

Brilliant. Good stuff.

indiemike

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

rockosolido — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:45:35 MST

Woah woah woah. Who gives a shit about Crysis, Yahtzee used an Electric Six song. My world is complete.

rockosolido

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

JustThisGuy — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:45:24 MST

@JustThisGuy: Sorry, I decided I should be more clear: it's the background image at approximately 1:20.

JustThisGuy

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Doomstalk — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:45:16 MST

@DugDawg: From what I gather, 3.5 GB of that RAM probably went to Vista itself.

Doomstalk

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Gordon_Shumway — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:44:58 MST

Damnit, you guys got me hooked on Yahtzee's reviews... I watched almost all of them in the past 2 days. And I had to watch some twice just to get all the jokes that whiz by.

Gordon_Shumway

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Randroid — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:43:42 MST

No mention of the weird and buggy enemy AI?! What happened Yahtzee!?

Randroid

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

JustThisGuy — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:41:24 MST

I'm so happy that he used that creepy painting with the children and the hands. I'd be very appreciative if one of you learned fellows could tell me what that painting is called.

JustThisGuy

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Ghede — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:38:18 MST

@Thanatos-: or maybe you are getting used to his faster method of speaking. As a fellow mile-a-minuter, I find that people who have known me for a while can understand me better than strangers.

Ghede

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

gazz — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:36:53 MST

What gets me is that once I have finished listening to one of his vids, I always read everything inside my head to his zero punctuation voice. Its really annoying!

gazz

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Thanatos — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:34:46 MST

He definitely is slowing down on these reviews i no longer have to watch it twice to get everything he says.

Thanatos

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Tiger-Fever — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:23:50 MST

Note to self: Do not watch Zero Punctuation videos while brushing teeth.

That being said, this was definitely one of my favourites. While I've yet to even see a computer that can run Crysis, it makes it all the better than I can still find this review hilarious.

Tiger-Fever

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

kelptocratic — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:23:45 MST

@Hitokage: Wow. Hot shit.

On the subject of PC crap, does anyone own/have experience with the 8800GTS 512 (G92 Core)? I'm killing myself trying to decide between the 8800GT 512 or the GTS. Does the +$50 for the GTS just buy better cooling, or is there a clock/shader increase as well?

kelptocratic

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

ThisCharmingMan — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:23:20 MST

Very entertaining. I was starting to lose faith in Yahtzee's wit and comedic timing. That loss of faith was obviously unwarranted.

ThisCharmingMan

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Renoistic — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:22:59 MST

I have a 3 year old computer with 1 gig of RAM and it played perfectly fine (except during the last fight) with 1024*768 and everything on medium. I don't understand all the bitching. You don't have to max everything - it still looks great! I prefer the gameplay in CoD4 and HL, though. Still, it was fun until the aliens showed up (which thankfully is at the end of the game).

Renoistic

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

acti. — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:20:59 MST

loLOLoLOL!!!!!!!!
Awesome WORK!

acti.

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Anarchist_Gamer — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:17:41 MST

Two claps. I enjoy this dog from down under. I will probably never be able to enjoy Crysis.

Anarchist_Gamer

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

BlackDove — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:17:04 MST

... and Racism.

BlackDove

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

lostalaska — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:13:33 MST

These reviews are great, I've definitely become a fan. I really like how if the game is good he gives it two sentences and then proceeds to rip the game a new one for the rest of the review. No final scores just a good 'ole ripping for a few minutes followed by a concise opinion on if the game falls into the garbage bin or is worth a try.

It's definitely a talent to be able to tear into a game like he does and still not offend most of the fans, because if you are a fan and have played the game much you probably also noticed the glaring little issues that even the best games have. The Mario Galaxy review is a shining example of Yahtzee's quality reviews.

lostalaska

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

DugDawg — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:12:54 MST

Great review from Zero Punctuation, as always. I finally got Crysis working smoothly on high settings. Of course, it took 4 gigs of PC 8500 ram to do it on Vista, but what can you do.

DugDawg

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Ignatius — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:12:52 MST

@kelptocratic:

[www.joystiq.com]

This. Still waiting on FedEx though... I should just drive around til I find one near me and tackle the dude. XD

Ignatius

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Ashurahori — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:12:26 MST

Also, funny how everyone loves Yahtzee's reviews when they're not about Mario, Zelda, or some other much-loved franchise. =D

Ashurahori

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Ashurahori — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:09:31 MST

I just hope I got a good enough PC to run this when this game goes in the bargain bin after a year or two. Because frankly, I think none of us will be able to run it even after that time.

Ashurahori

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Swift_ — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:09:06 MST

@bluesquareapple: The RE5 trailer received the criticism because of who YOU were. If you were a black operative killing black people, nothing would have happened. I hate starting arguments, but your analysis does not give critics enough credit. No doubt there were many who, as you said, jumped the minute they saw a single black person. But, there is also justifiable quarrel with the premise.

Similarly in Crysis, it is also because of the nationality the player assumes. Much like in RE4/5, it creates (to some) the impression of racial superiority. You and I might be smarter than to believe such nonsense ourselves, but some critic and quite possibly the game designers themselves, may not be.

Swift_

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

evensteven — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:08:22 MST

i do most of my blog reading at work, so this is actually the first time i've watched any of the zero punctuation videos. since watching i've spent about half an hour catching up on what i've been missing. i <3 this man and his disregard for punctuation. in a completely hetero kind of way.

evensteven

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Irenicus-the one and only — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:07:51 MST

Great review lol. "sneak up behind enemies and give them a wedgie" :P

Nah, the review is pretty accurate tbh. "Looks good but boring," or maybe that was just my opinion :D

Irenicus-the one and only

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

TOCATL — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:06:32 MST

@bluesquareapple: To say that a game is racist or not, is how the story of the game in managed as you progress rather than the ethnical origins of the enemy or fellow caracters...

TOCATL

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

bluesquareapple — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:01:43 MST

@Witzbold: I'm assuming it's the same "racism" card that some people tried to pull from the RE5 teaser. You only kill one race of people, so it must be racist!

bluesquareapple

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

JudgeNutmeg — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:00:07 MST

I love crumpets, but I'm not evil or dead. The night is young, however.

JudgeNutmeg

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

ghostfacelz — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 12:00:07 MST

MS Flight Simulator..LOL...
Solving a rubicks cube with your elbows xD
My coworkers must think ive lost it...

ghostfacelz

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

TOCATL — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:57:19 MST

Crysis is probably the only new gen FPS (besides metroidprime3) i would like to play, mostly to see the graphics, but i agree with yatzee the game should not be like all the recent fps with a linear progress and more like bf1942 where you can roam around the level...

TOCATL

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Strangelove — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:57:14 MST

Well, it was automatically a winner for me the second I heard Island in the Sun to start out. Gotta love Weezer. How about a Guitar Hero version? But I digress ...

It's cosmic, because I finally bought Crysis this morning, accepting my medium settings limitations with the knowledge that my future rig will be able to run the game in all its glory.

It was the demo that eventually changed my mind and warranted the purchase, as it was too much fun to sneak up, grab a guy by the throat, trigger the strength suit, and toss his ass airborn. I also love sneaking up to a settlement, triggering the strength suit, and knocking fucking buildings down.

It really is a great sandbox-style FPS (sandbox in the sense that you have to figure out your plan of attack, which can differ greatly based upon the enemies/environments/chosen suit powers. I'm having a great time with it thus far.

Strangelove

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Hauler — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:56:37 MST

Absolutely brilliant if only for the Columbo reference.

Hauler

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

y2julio — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:55:39 MST

LMFAO that was funny.

y2julio

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

kelptocratic — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:55:27 MST

@Hitokage: Grats man! What kind of system did they hook you up with?

kelptocratic

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

nya-chama — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:54:54 MST

Teehee, Shawshank Redemption reference was funny. Shame I don't have the money for Crysis and my soul is reserved for more evil things.

nya-chama

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Ignatius — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:52:10 MST

Irony be it that my awesome gaming PC I won from Joystiq comes today.

I have Crysis sitting on my desk, ready to be installed.

Ignatius

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Morigato — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:49:20 MST

While not my favorite Zero Punctuation in terms of the review, as I have no opinion of Crysis whatsoever (MAC and a PC from the stone age of computers... 2002?), however, the ending music MORE than made up for it. It is my belief that everything should involve at least one Electric Six song (and if it shows the video too, then it HAS to be Gay Bar). In any case, insanely amusing visual misinterpretations as per usual make me a happy panda!

Morigato

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

stranger — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:48:02 MST

Wow.

My first time clicking thru to a zero punctuation clip. Amazing. Definitely won't be my last.

stranger

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

kelptocratic — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:47:49 MST

@Witzbold: My guess (and I really have no idea, no having played it) is that there's probably some "Engrish" in re: North Korean soldiers.

kelptocratic

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Lyrai — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:46:31 MST

@dead_red_eyes: Wikipedia [en.wikipedia.org] says he hasn't done a whole lot. A few movies, a Broadway play, a cameo in a film.

Lyrai

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

angry_gamer — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:46:27 MST

This one I throughly enjoyed. His best one of the new year.

angry_gamer

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Norellicus — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:44:51 MST

Oh my god it hurts...

I'm seriously going to die laughing, ow

I just ate too ><

Norellicus

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Witzbold — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:43:21 MST

@MasterOfPastures: Im guessing he might be talking about number 2 which isnt out yet. The one that takes place in Africa. At least thats what I hope hes talking about.

Asides from that this one has got to have had some of the best little original "art" of his yet!

Witzbold

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Kyle81 — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:41:29 MST

Crysis is awesome, just need to fix up the multiplayer

Kyle81

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

dead_red_eyes — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:40:13 MST

@Brian Crecente:

Haha. I remember watching that show when I was little. I wonder what happened to Peter Falk.

Yahtzee is the king!!! Another awesome review.

dead_red_eyes

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

huginn — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:39:59 MST

Not as highly amazing as some of his other ones, but top notch!

huginn

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Gas Powered Goose — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:39:36 MST

my ribs the hurt from the laughter. Yahtzee is a good man for sure.

Gas Powered Goose

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

NotAZombie — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:39:21 MST

@kelptocratic: Oh wow someone else who liked the Xbox version. The multiplayer was good fun and the single player was fun until the game decided that very dark colors and "scares" were what I needed. It was a lot better when it was all tropical and bright out.

NotAZombie

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Figcoinc — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:36:58 MST

Hahaha, he just keeps on putting out quality. This made my workday just a tab bit more manageable.

Figcoinc

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

kelptocratic — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:36:46 MST

Hah! The BFG and Night vision goggles bit was pretty funny. I never got past the stupid Ewok-village bit in the PC Far Cry, which if memory serves, was like an hour into the game, but the scenery was pretty when I wasn't getting slapped around mercilessly.

Then again, I'm part of a very small subgroup when I say I really enjoyed the Xbox version of Far Cry.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to trying Crysis. Doing decent upgrade on the PC at the moment, and once I climb out of videocard selection hell, I plan on giving it a shot.

kelptocratic

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

MasterOfPastures — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:36:30 MST

Racism? In Farcry? Did I miss something?

MasterOfPastures

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Brian Crecente — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:35:41 MST

Columbo. Holy shit, now I DO have a mancrush on Croshaw!

Brian Crecente

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Flurp — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:34:04 MST

I was hoping he would review crysis!!!1!1!1

I wasn't disapointed!

I love Zero Punctuation!! My PS3 Theme is a Zero punctuation based one!!

Flurp

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Dual45s — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:34:01 MST

As always, bloody brilliant.

Dual45s

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Lockenator — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:34:00 MST

@Flawless101: Same here, hehe. Then he shamelessly sold out and went to escapist. :P

Lockenator

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Lockenator — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:32:52 MST

Nice, keep them coming. Excellent as usual.

Lockenator

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Flawless101 — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:30:56 MST

I remember this guy from when he did them on Youtube (all two of them :p) He's awesome

Flawless101

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Maleficence — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:28:17 MST

This is one of my favourite reviews of his so far, azbsolutely excellent. Mind you, I say that about most of his reviews. :D

Maleficence