I can summarize my experience designing user interfaces like this: if you were to place a refrigerator and a toilet side by side in a room with no windows and a door which locked from the inside, 9.3 out of 10 people entering that room would defecate in the freezer and urinate on the floor.
[Editor's Note: Every month, we pay Tim Rogers to share his unique view of video games. But Tim has gone and made a video game. For free, we're letting him introduce his new game as only Tim can. He'll be back later this month with stuff we actually pay him to write. Take it away, Tim... ]