Kotaku: Zero Punctuation

Zero Punctuation Takes On Age Of Conan Naked

Mike Fahey — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 12:00:00 MDT

While Yahtzee isn't that big a fan of the Ememorpagah (MMORPG) genre, he decided to suck up his general distaste and plunge into the world of Funcom's Age of Conan anyway, a fact I am sure has nothing to do with the fact that The Escapist currently looks as if it were being forced out of one of the game's distended orifices. These sorts of coincidences always happen with website advertising, such as the other week when my Coors Lite review went up. Awkward!

Yahtzee plays through the first 30 or so levels of the game as a naked Stygian woman, and if that doesn't give you the complete Age of Conan experience, I don't know what will.

Zero Punctuation [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation On Edward Carnby And Not Being Alone In The Dark

Luke Plunkett — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 06:20:00 MDT

Yes, it's from last week, but we were busy, so didn't get around to it. So enjoy it now, like cold, leftover pizza for breakfast. You know the drill: Yahtzee plays Alone in the Dark, Yahtzee plays the critic while making the game's faults seem far funnier than they actually are. And a lot funnier than the new intro/outro music, which seems specifically engineered to be as unsuitable as humanly possible.

[The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation on Lego Indy, With Bonus!

Mike Fahey — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 14:20:00 MDT

Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, it's pretty fun, try it out. This pretty much sums up Yahtzee's latest Zero Punctuation, in which he takes on Lego Indiana Jones, a game far too cute and nostalgia-packed to really trash. Don't let the quick summary keep you from watching, however, as not only are there some truly laugh-out-loud moments in the main review, the bonus review afterwards is just dead on.

How do you guys like the new music? ZP was getting a bit too big to continue using commercial music without drawing attention, so now it opens and closes with generic heavy metal. Call it his Guilty Gear period.

Zero Punctuation: LEGO Indy [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Takes On Ctrl+Alt+Del

Mike Fahey — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 16:00:00 MDT

Either there were no games worth Yahtzee reviewing this week, or recent developments in the gaming webcomic Ctrl+Alt+Del have frustrated him as much as they've frustrated me and he decided he needed to vent. Yahtzee hides behind the view of making fun of all webcomics in a generic fashion until he gets to the bit about a whacky webcomic shifting gears to do a story on the female character having a miscarriage. This is exactly what happened in Tim Buckley's Ctrl+Alt+Del, a comic I've long been a fan of but can suddenly not stomach.

While the hardcore fans have been defending him and calling him brave and such, the more...I suppose softcore fans like myself have just stared at the comics wondering why the hell he would do such a thing. Very special episodes were great for TV sitcoms in the 80's, but suddenly tossing a dead baby into your whacky webcomic just isn't quite the same.

Zero Punctuation [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Wades Through MGS4

Mike Fahey — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 10:40:00 MDT

In this week's Zero Punctuation, Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw takes on the PlayStation 3's great white-haired hope, Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots, and as I expected he pokes at all of the usual failings people tend to find with the series. Too many cutscenes, confusing plot twists, redundant dialogue, etc. To a point I have to agree with him. I played through the game myself this past weekend, and I have to say that had they not included the nifty camera swapping mechanic during mission briefings I would have fallen asleep at several points throughout the game. I did, however, find myself crying like a baby several times during the experience, though that could be attributed to the fact that I can be an oversensitive little bitch at times.

Zero Punctuation The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Does Not Enjoy Haze, Either

Luke Plunkett — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 03:00:00 MDT

Why didn't you enjoy Haze? If you've actually played it, and aren't just accepting that the game's a load of crap because the internet told you so, feel free to watch this week's episode of Zero Punctuation and choose from one of dozens of reasons Yahtzee catalogues to agree with. Oh, and if you're wondering why the video progress bar is only 2/3 of the way through when ZP finishes, don't. Just...press stop right away.

Zero Punctuation: Haze [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation On Oblivion

Mike Fahey — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 17:20:00 MDT

Leave it to Yahtzee to make me feel bad about a game I spent over sixty hours exploring. I could have sworn I had thoroughly enjoyed myself back then, but now I'm not so sure. I suppose this is the double-edged sword of reviewing older titles. The week before last's Painkiller review made me dig out my copy of that game, and now he has me pondering burying Oblivion.

Of course no one has that much power, and I never did complete that last Shivering Isles godhood quest...

Zero Punctuation [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Takes On The World Ends With You

Brian Ashcraft — Wed, 28 May 2008 22:00:00 MDT

Sorry for the hold-up! Here's this week's Zero Punctuation, which is taking on Square Enix's DS title The World Ends With You. Totally agree about using the dual screens during the combat. Totally.

The World Ends With You [The Escapist]

How Painkiller Should Have Been Advertised

Mike Fahey — Fri, 23 May 2008 10:30:00 MDT

Seemingly moments after The Escapist released this week's Zero Punctuation video featuring 2004's horror FPS Painkiller, Steam's home page got an updated advertisement for the Gold Edition of the game, utilizing Yahtzee's astute insight into the biggest selling point of the title.

If they had originally marketed the game in a plain red box with the line "Includes guns that shoot shurikens and lightning" in big gold letters, Painkiller would have become the bestselling first-person shooter of all time.

Steam Home Page [Valve - Thanks Mascott!]

Zero Punctuation Overdoses On Painkiller

Mike Fahey — Thu, 22 May 2008 09:20:00 MDT

According to Yahtzee we are just now slipping into the Summer gaming drought, so rather than struggle to find a more recent game to review he's gone and dug out 2004's Painkiller, one of the best FPS games ever for folks that just want to kill some monsters. As Yahtzee points out, Painkiller not only lets you kill tons of bad guys, it also lets you do it in some very creative ways.

I'd actually like to see him review more old games. By the time he gets to the newer titles I've already paid, played, and weighed them. The retrospectives have nostalgia on their side, reminding me of a time when I didn't feel I absolutely had to play everything that came out.

Zero Punctuation [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation On Grand Theft Auto IV

Mike Fahey — Wed, 14 May 2008 11:20:00 MDT

Well that was relatively fast, now wasn't it? Yahtzee seems to have jumped on Grand Theft Auto IV just as quickly as the rest of the world,and for the most part he loves it, going as far as to inform us that he plans on playing it some more after the review is finished, which, as he says, is fucking unprecedented. He also seems to share my penchant for turning the cars in happy little circles whenever the handbrake is evoked, which eventually saw me resorting to the time-honored bouncing off of things method of turning the car. I am beginning to find I enjoy Yahtzee's reviews more the more I enjoy the game he is reviewing, whether he is positive or negative. Having said that, one of the best so far.

Zero Punctuation [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Takes On You

Mike Fahey — Wed, 07 May 2008 19:00:00 MDT

Apparently Yahtzee's review of Super Smash Bros. Brawl received so much negative response that he decided to dedicate this week's Zero Punctuation to you, his viewing public. More specifically, the members of his viewing public that saw fit to bombard him with letters about how wrong he was about his review. This sort of thing always amuses the hell out of me as you cannot tell someone that their opinion is wrong. You can try to change their opinion, but an opinion cannot technically be incorrect. You can disagree til the cows come home, but then why the hell are you living with cows? Exactly. I especially like the letter that asks how he can call them game reviews without a numerical score. How indeed.

Zero Punctuation: Chains of Olympus

Brian Crecente — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 13:00:00 MDT

What starts out as a pretty slow, actually not so funny take on God of War Chains of Olympus, turns to typical gold after Yahtzee seems to find his stride and knocks it out of the park again and again... as usual.

The Escapist

Zero Punctuation Beats On Smash Bros. Brawl

Mike Fahey — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 12:00:00 MDT

This week sees Yahtzee take on a subject that has been plaguing him for weeks, his fans. Specifically his fans who have been angrily demanding a Super Smash Bros. Brawl review since time began. Well here it is folks, and he isn't exactly pleased with the way things turned out, though a great deal of the negativitiy seems to stem from where he decided to review it rather than the game itself. A fine job, with special thanks to GAMETRADERS ROBINA, but still only the second best video review of SSBB on the internets.

Zero Punctuation Reviews Condemned 2 (And Indigo Prophecy)

Mark Wilson — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 13:30:00 MDT

This week, Yahtzee officially reviews Condemned 2. And that's great. But then, in the heat of passion, he breaks into a mini-review of Indigo Prophecy. Plus, if you really think about it, there's actually a good amount of rhetoric on the original Condemned, too. So you are actually getting like 2 to 2 1/2 Zero Punctuations this week. And it's all coming at you for a low, low price of just $100 an episode. Oh, didn't you know? Then you're fucked, man. But at least you get some steak knives (for only $8.95 S/H).

Zero Punctuation: Condemned 2: Bloodshot [The Escpaist]

Zero Punctuation Relishes No More Heroes

Mark Wilson — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 12:40:00 MDT

While Yahtzee was a little bit late to squeeze into our No More Heroes Frankenreview, he still offers a pretty enjoyable review of the game, likening the experience to, among countless other colorful, non sequitur metaphors, Branston Pickle. Having never consumed Branston Pickle, I can only assume that this review is absolutely, utterly false in its conclusion. And as I don't plan on visiting Branston's home in England any time in the near future to try it (or even going to the shelf in any large chain store to buy it), I should live a life of blissful ignorance for some time.

Zero Punctuation: No More Heroes [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation On Army Of Two

Mike Fahey — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 13:20:00 MDT

While I had previously thought that Yahtzee might be slowly losing his touch, this week's Zero Punctuation on Army of Two actually made me laugh out loud in several spaces, though that could be whatever illness is currently ravaging my body (I suspect scurvy). It actually plays out a lot like Crecente's review of the game, with the exception that Crecente loved the weapons customization, which in Yahtzee's eyes makes him a...you know, I'm pretty sure completing that sentence isn't conducive to being employed, so I shall just leave it at that.

Zero Punctuation on Army of Two [the escapist]

Zero Punctuation On Zack & Wiki

Mark Wilson — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 13:20:00 MDT

I bought Zack & Wiki on day one, triumphantly presenting my wife with the game that would both explain some of my history as a gamer (PC adventure junkie) and placate her need for an interactive experience without headshots or corpse humping—all while providing us a worthwhile, couple-building challenge. She got about ten minutes into it before deciding to hate the game forever. Yahtzee likes Zack & Wiki a bit more than she did.

Zero Punctuation: Zack & Wiki [The Escapist]

Yahtzee Goes Jurassic On Turok

Michael McWhertor — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 15:20:20 MDT

Spoiler alert! Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw doesn't like Turok. But instead of editorially ripping that game a new one, this episode of Zero Punctuation simply uses it as an example of everything that's wrong with console first person shooters. Not the least of which are Aliens-esque character rehashes, the "grizzled, sassy multi-ethnic military types often wearing—or at least located somewhere inside—suits of powered armor" otherwise known as Space Marines. It's a doozy, mostly because of Yahtzee waxing nostalgic about the "backwoods pig rapists" of Redneck Rampage. Give it a play.

Zero Punctuation: Turok [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Burning Out

Mike Fahey — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 18:00:19 MDT

I don't know if Yahtzee is slowly losing his touch or if I'm just getting used to him, but I suppose even a mouthful of angry bees can get boring if you do it every week. This time around he takes on Burnout Paradise, which he describes as, "A game for cool people who like fast cars and don't have enough time to play games because of all the sex they have." That having been said, I've just ordered a dozen copies, just in case anyone takes him seriously.

Zero Punctuation: Burnout Paradise [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Takes On Uncharted: Drake's Fortune

Mark Wilson — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:40:10 MST

This week, in between some scathing political commentary, Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw reviews Uncharted: Drake's Fortune for the PS3. Does he like it? Of course not. Can you imagine his reviews happy? We can only pray that divine intervention keeps both love and ecstasy from Yahtzee's grasp, lest we lose Zero Punctuation forever.

Quote of the week: "Saying that an action game's got a vehicle section these days carries about as much weight as saying that it comes in a box."

Zero Punctuation [TheEscapist]

Zero Punctuation's GDC Awards Special

Mike Fahey — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 08:20:28 MST

No new Zero Punctuation yesterday? Why!?!?! Well because Yahtzee was busy appearing in a series of interstitials for last night's Game Developers Choice awards at GDC, and here for your viewing pleasure is that series of interstitials. See Croshaw take on faceless FPS protagonists, the guitar based game phenomenon, and finally the entire year of 2007. Very odd to be hearing censor beeps during an episode of Zero Punctuation, but you've heard enough of Yahtzee's ranting at this point that your mind will probably automatically fill in the blanks anyway. Bollocks!

Zero Punctuation Plus A Touching Love Story

Mike Fahey — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 11:20:59 MST

This week Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw of X-Play fame takes a look at SimCity Societies and doesn't quite like it, coming to the conclusion that drawing your own city in MS Paint would be a more fulfilling experience - but that's not important. What is important is the touching story of love and loss that follows the review, featuring characters from Valve's Team Fortress 2 and a musak version of "Up Where We Belong" from 1983's An Officer and a Gentlemen. It'll bring a tear to your eye. Share it with someone you love this Valentine's Day.

Zero Punctuation [the escapist]

Zero Punctuation Previews Going To X-Play

Mark Wilson — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 10:40:34 MST

Wow Yahtzee, you've done the impossible. You have a television program running previews of a freaking 3-minute review. Yeah, did you hear? X-Play will be running a snippet of your upcoming Zero Punctuations every Tuesday night. And including the clip's introduction, run time, and accompanying in-show bumpers, we wouldn't be surprised if this Tuesday teaser took just as long as your actual Wednesday review.

It's ludicrous media piggybacking, but we don't blame you...pending that you sleep on a big pile of greenbacks after a hard day's work.

"X-Play" to Feature World Premieres of New "Zero Punctuation" Videos
With Weekly Sneak Previews

Previews of The Escapist Magazine's Popular Web Video Series Debut on "X-Play" Tuesday, Feb. 12 at 8 pm

LOS ANGELES, February 11, 2008 - "Zero Punctuation" is coming to "X-Play," giving viewers of the most-watched video game show on television an exclusive sneak peek at each new episode of the Web's most popular video game review series. Beginning Tuesday, February 12, short previews of the wildly popular videos from creator Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw and The Escapist magazine will become an ongoing "X-Play" feature. Previews of "Zero Punctuation" videos will premiere exclusively on "X-Play" every Tuesday evening, before the Wednesday premiere of the full, uncut reviews at www.escapistmagazine.com, which will remain the series' online home. "Zero Punctuation" makes its world broadcast premiere on "X-Play," February 12, 2008 at 8 pm ET/PT, only on G4.

"Zero Punctuation" has become one of the video game world's most popular and infamous sources of criticism, unleashing reviews that combine humor and scathing insight with uproarious results. Each review combines deceptively simple animation with breathlessly blunt language, mercilessly mocking the weakest points in even the most critically acclaimed games.

"Every game has its faults, even the truly great ones," said Morgan Webb, host of "X-Play." "Nothing is funnier than seeing the mighty mocked."

"I was already really excited about the new 'X-Play' format," said Adam Sessler, host of "X-Play." "Now I can barely contain myself. We're dedicated to giving gaming fans what they want and we know they want 'Zero Punctuation.'"

"'Zero Punctuation' is game reviewing like it's never been done before," said Russ Pitts, Acquisitions and Production Manager at The Escapist. "We're pleased to share the schizophrenia with 'X-Play's' audience."

The "Zero Punctuation" previews are the newest addition to the updated "X-Play" format, which features a daily comprehensive overview of video game news and culture, in addition to the brutally honest reviews for which the show is known. Every weeknight at 8 pm, new, half-hour episodes of "X-Play" will give viewers a comprehensive update on each day's videogame-related developments, along with a wide range of new features, including behind-the-scenes sneak peeks at games in development; interviews with industry luminaries; live, hands-on demonstrations of games before they hit store shelves; and in-depth analysis of the latest videogame trends. More information is available at http://www.g4tv.com/xplay.

Zero Punctuation On Call Of Duty 4

Mike Fahey — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 11:20:00 MST

Yahtzee isn't all that fond of taking requests, but it seems that the horde of Call of Duty 4 fans hungry to see their favorite game get slapped in the face with Croshaw's angry, spite-filled penis have moved him to action. In reviewing the game he comes to realize what we've known for months - Call of Duty 4 is just as good as a prostitute with three identical sets of genitalia. Of course he draws this conclusion out a good four minutes, but it is a very good four minutes indeed. I think I prefer it when he reviews games that he likes, as it seems to make him try harder.

Zero Punctuation [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Takes on Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles

Mark Wilson — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 13:40:41 MST

When Capcom released a rail shooter as their next installment to Resident Evil, it was almost asking for a once over by Zero Punctuation's Ben Croshaw. All in all he's pretty fair to the game and the concept, though thank goodness for black boxes covering cartoon privates.

Favorite line (abridged): "Do you remember what those villains from Captain Planet were like, how they'd steal an oil tanker and deliberately crash smack into a beach just to teach the sea lions a lesson in complacency ...well that's basically the Umbrella Corporation."

Zero Punctuation: Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles [theescapist]

The Secrets of Zero Punctuation Revealed!

Mark Wilson — Fri, 25 Jan 2008 12:20:18 MST

We're all big fans of Zero Punctuation around here, so we were pretty eager to read Boing Boing Gadgets' interview with auteur Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw (why we didn't do one ourselves...hindsight). In addition to talking about his favorite games (Silent Hill 2, Prince of Persia: Sands of Time and Portal), Croshaw finally laid to rest the debates we've had over how long these spots take to produce.

I usually take a few days to play through the game and I'll usually finish it, or get as far as I can before I feel I can formulate an opinion. After that I'll devote a day to writing the script...Then comes making the images, which usually takes me 2 or 3 days. I used to record the speech first, but I found that I'd sometimes want to make changes to the script while making the images, especially if I wanted to reword a phrase that I found too hard to visualise. Once the images are done, recording the narration and stringing it all together in Windows Movie Maker is the easy part.

We'd always known it: when the project's said and done the time approaches a full work week. For those interested in the rest of the interview, hit up BBG.

A Nice Little Q&A with Zero Punctuation's Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw [boingboinggadgets]

Zero Punctuation Experiments with Machinima... Badly

Brian Crecente — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 14:00:51 MST

While I love Croshaw's latest review, this one of The Witcher, I wasn't so delighted with the bit of comedy machinima slapped on to the end. It was, I hope, just an experiment and one we won't see more of anytime soon. Fortunately The Review of The Witcher has a wonderful punchline and mentions washing gimps, so I'll forgive him his indulgence.

Zero Punctuation: The Witcher [The Escapist Magazine]

Zero Punctuation Invades GDC Awards

Brian Crecente — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 12:56:24 MST

Zero Punctuation, everyone's favorite video game rant reviewer, will be making a guest appearance at this year's Game Developer Choice Awards during the GDC next month.

Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw is producing three new Zero Punctuation shorts to be played during the ceremony to present his personal awards for video game achievements last year. Hopefully, they won't lose any of their bite just because they're being made specifically for a group of developers. I suspect they may, in fact, be even more sharp-tongue and witted.

The three videos will pop up on The Escapist online magazine shortly after being shown during the ceremony.

The Escapist and Zero Punctuation Join 8th Annual Game Developers Choice Awards
Animated videos created to honor 2007 industry achievement

Durham, N.C., San Francisco, C.A. - January 23, 2008 - The Escapist, the cutting edge online interactive entertainment publication, is excited to sponsor this year's Game Developers Choice Awards at GDC. The magazine will also be producing three unique Zero Punctuation video shorts to be played during the awards ceremony.

"We're delighted to be a part of an event highlighting the excellent and innovative work of the field we cover," said Julianne Greer, editor-in-chief of The Escapist magazine. "And of course we're going to throw in a little of our own commentary as well, just to spice things up a bit."

The Zero Punctuation videos will debut at the ceremony and feature Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw presenting his lively review and personal awards of video game achievement in 2007. Fans will be able to find the exclusive videos, amongst Yahtzee's weekly reviews, after the awards on The Escapist. Along with laugh-inducing video content, the magazine is a leader in providing breaking news updates, riveting editorials and reviews from the industry's most accredited writers.

CMP's Game Developers Conference (GDC) produces and hosts the Game Developers Choice Awards, presented by Gamasutra.com and Game Developer Magazine. Held February 20 during GDC, the Game Developers Choice Awards honor the developers of the best video games released in the past year along with key figures from the video game community.

Zero Punctuation Doesn't Hate Crysis

Mike Fahey — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 11:20:36 MST

I'm right up there with Mark when it comes to Zero Punctuation, harboring a bizarre sort of hetero man-love for Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw while constantly fearing that the next Zero Punctuation will be the episode where he finally loses it and simple says the word "cock" over and over again for three minutes using all sorts of tonal modulations while his adorable little stick figure avatar sits in the corner of the screen and cries. Luckily this week's review of Crytek's Crysis is not that episode, and aside from the obligatory "OMG system specs" moment, Ben manages to entertain completely while making references to prison rape, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, and the master himself - Columbo. More game reviews need to end with a giant thumb's up popping out of a crudely drawn cartoon character's ass.

[the escapist]

Zero Punctuation: Silent Hill Origins

Brian Crecente — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 19:30:37 MST

The latest Zero Punctuation almost had me fooled, I thought, for a second, that it was going to heap lots of love on the game, in that punctuation-free, staccato burst of insight that we've all come to know and love. But in fact, Ben Croshaw, you guessed it, hates Silent Hill: Origins also. Stop the presses.

Zero Punctuation: Silent Hill Origins [The Escapist Magazine]

Zero Punctuation on Super Mario Galaxy

Mark Wilson — Wed, 02 Jan 2008 13:40:42 MST

This will make no sense without watching the clip, but I agree with absolutely everything said in this review other than most of what is said about Super Mario Galaxy itself. And it should be fairly obvious by now that the Princess is really just an excuse for Mario and Bowser to eventually explore a homosexual/heterospecies relationship, as soon as they work through their self-hate (mirrored in one another).

Favorite line of the week: "The final bossfight is about as hard as the Stay Puffed mashmallow man's dick in the presence of his grandma."

Zero Punctuation: Super Mario Galaxy [theescapist]

Zero Punctuation on Mass Effect

Mark Wilson — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 13:40:00 MST

As a self=proclaimed Mass Effect fanboy AND Zero Punctuation cult worshipper, I feared the viewing of this clip would either:

a. Make my head explode
or
b. Make my head explode AND cause a chain reaction leading to the destruction of the galaxy, then Universe and then space/time continuum

For whatever reason, both my head and the Universe are still intact. Maybe because this week Yahtzee has upgraded his metaphors to bacon filled sandwiches as opposed to the...less enticing prospects of weeks gone by.

Zero Punctuation [theescapist]

Zero Punctuation "Watery Ejaculate Sandwich" (Assassin's Creed) Edition

Mark Wilson — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 13:40:33 MST

Given that we used Yahtzee's "watery ejaculate sandwich" metaphor in the headline, you'd think that he didn't like Assassin's Creed. But actually, he enjoyed the game quite a bit—at a level somewhere between Jericho and Orange Box—which though a wide margin, is clarified by (yet another) "bronze" medal metaphor. We don't have much else to say on the topic, other than now we know why you always go for the gold.

Yahtzee gets stabby with Assassin's Creed [theescapist]

Zero Punctuation on Clive Barker's Jericho

Mark Wilson — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 13:20:58 MST

Oooh, Yahtzee is angry today. He doesn't like Clive Barker's Jericho very much, and even in the soft, white-gloved hands of his sensitive rhetoric, his Jericho dislike bleeds through into the review...just a bit. Actually, I found it (and all the other mediocre reviews) all quite refreshing, since I assumed that something must be wrong with me—switched at birth with a real video game writer possibly—to have had no interest in this game, ever.

Zero Punctuation [the escapist]

Zero Punctuation And The Phantom Hourglass

Mike Fahey — Wed, 07 Nov 2007 14:00:05 MST

This week's Zero Punctuation sees Yahtzee go head to head with Nintendo's reviewer masterpiece, The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass, coming to the inevitable conclusion that the next Zelda game would be much better were it Okami. This is of course true for most games released these days, but I'm not going to point that out to him lest he disembowel me with a well aimed, super-speed tirade.

Zero Punctuation: Phantom Hourglass [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Takes On MOH Airborne, And US

Mark Wilson — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 12:20:37 MDT

We're not sure if Yahtzee hates MOH Airborne or America more. But he's pretty funny as usual on both accounts. And we appreciate when he points out that video games about WWII have lasted longer than the real WWII. What can we say? We freaking love teabagging Hitler.

Zero Punctuation: MOH Airborne [theescapist]

Zero Punctuation, All Nintendo Love

Brian Crecente — Wed, 24 Oct 2007 13:02:58 MDT

Love? No wait I meant hate. The sort of hate that includes eating shit, shooting developers in the head and smothering Mario to death with a pillow. That's hate right?

Zero Punctuation: Super Paper Mario [The Escapist]

Zero Punctuation Takes On Tabula Rasa

Mark Wilson — Wed, 10 Oct 2007 13:40:01 MDT

Here's the latest rant from Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw on Richard Garriott, MMOs and, of course, Tabula Rasa itself. Enjoyable as always, we especially appreciate the shots at "Lord British" and Croshaw's softly crafted review feedback such as, "I'd never actually pay for this kind of crap, because even if i did somehow desperately need to lose money, I'd simply throw it off a bridge."

We hope you enjoyed that quote. Because he talks really, really fast and that one line took us like 5 minutes to transcribe. We guess it was sort of funnier with the little man and the yellow background and everything.

Zero Punctuation: Tabula Rasa [theescapist]

Zero Punctuation Takes On Halo 3

Mark Wilson — Wed, 03 Oct 2007 13:20:33 MDT

Zero Punctuation is always a funny review, but their take on the Halo canon...never having played a Halo game in the past...is schizophrenically insightful (and I guess a little ironic, coming from a train of thought voice of a chain smoking speed freak).

Zero Punctuation: Halo 3 [The Escapist]