The controls are far too simple for a serious fighting game. Shake the Wiimote to slash while maneuvering with the control stick on the nunchuck. Holding down A and shaking does a power attack, while holding B summons forth a special attack. There is no jump button. None. Nada. Bleach men can't jump. As you hit and get hit the bankai meter fills, and once full giving the 'chuck a shake activates your bankai, which ranges from your character glowing slightly to your weapon becoming a giant freaking skeletal snake. I know this is straight from the series, but it's kinda sad when your opponent suddenly fills the whole screen and your only response is to glow menacingly at them. Rawr! I glow!

In an attempt to mix things up a bit, when two characters' power attacks land at the same time, a little rock, paper, scissors-type mini-game ensues, with vertical, horizontal, and stabbing attacks. At the end of five rounds of this the character with the most wins performs a special attack. Interesting at first, but pnce I kicked the difficulty up to hard it felt like entire rounds were made up of an endless string of these. Highly annoying.

With cutscenes comprised of still pictures with captions mixed with in-game cinematics, I wasn't all that impressed with the overall presentation of the game. Still, for fans of the anime and manga there is plenty of extra content to unlock on top of a grand total of 32 playable characters. You win coins by playing through arcade and story mode which you can use in the shop to unlock extras, so you at least they've got the fan service down pat.

As for the awesome new character created for the game...well, here he is.

I wouldn't recommend Bleach: Shattered Blade to anyone but the most fervent fan of the show. It's a simple little fighter with almost no gameplay depth whatsoever. Any game I can beat simply by simulating masturbation with the Wiimote needs to tweak it's difficulty level somewhat. Either that or I am just really good at it.

I meant the game, you perverts.

I just received Tetris Tower 3D in the mail from Firebox.

The game plays a bit like Connect Four meets Tetris. It's evil, but I kinda like it. The object of the game is to try and get a solid line across to score a point. The game both tells you which piece you need to drop and how much time you have left.

The thing that makes it evil is that you quickly shift from trying to make solid lines to totally screwing over your opponent after you get in the lead. That and you can't tuck falling pieces under overhangs, which really messes with your mind if you're a long-time Tetris player.

I probably would buy something like this just for the kitsch, value so the fun gameplay is an added bonus. My only complaints are that the game doesn't have an off switch or a way to crank up the volume. Oh, and $50 seems a bit excessive.

Check out the video on the jump to see the game in action. Yes, I totally pwned my 5-year-old son. Brian Crecente

Tetris 3D [Firebox]

The illustrious Cabel has posted up the third entry in his series of DS Lite video reviews, comparing screen brightness to the GBA Micro and PSP. There's even a thrilling That Girl style montage of the DS Lite going about its daily adventures while trying to drain its battery dry!

Ashcraft! Where's our DS Lites, dammit?

Nintendo DS Lite Third Look [Cabel]