Kotaku 
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Denver, 4:42 PM
Mon Dec 7
41 posts in the last 24 hours
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Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
Come on, game devs. I know you want your sex appeal, but it kind of HAS to make sense.
08/26/09
08/25/09
I mean seriously, why are skin-tight suits so commonly drawn this way?
08/25/09
Excuse me mam but I need you to strip down and sit in this putty mold for 15 minutes until it hardens.
Per regulation rules we'll have to make the suit as skin tight as possible to decrease wind resistance while you are ghosting. We could just paint it on but that takes to long and the paint comes off in rain.
Don't mind me...I'll just be observing in that dark room over there with the one way mirror monitoring your vitals.
08/25/09
although i have high amounts of respect for the company because their fanbase is high and it seems that they put out quality.. im just not a fan of games like starcraft/warcraft and wow.. maybe diablo.. but not really.
but as for old blizzard... rock n roll racing, lost vikings, death and return of superman, and blackthorne are among my favorite 16 bit games.. i know they could bring some of that amazing quality to some current gen non "craft"/diablo games.
08/25/09
*shudders*
I'm not even going to try to put on my happy shoes today. After hearing people whine for days on end since blizzcon about well, pretty much everything. On every forum that I belong to (though I must say this is the first time in a long time that destructoid peeps are starting to look rational in contrast. Hell 4chan has reacted more reasonably than some of you...) . I've made a decision today. I officially hate console gamers, pc gamers, mmo gamers, retro gamers, people who watch games, game developers, game testers, I hate games of monopoly. I hate games. I said it. I now hate games.
Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to stick my face into my air conditioner, and scream until the freon seizes my lungs shut, and I die in the fetal position clutching my Asus mini notebook as zdoom runs in the background playing the title music from ultimate doom on endless loop. My swan song.
Blech. I'm done reading and writing comments that contribute absolutely nothing to a discussion, and watching pedantic 16 yr olds banter endlessly about the most obtuse things imaginable when I should be worrying about why the state of california hasn't returned my goddamn income taxes, or if were gonna be able to afford a new baby, or etc. etc. etc.
If I don't get banned for this awesome, I'm deleting my account in the next couple of days. But for all the wonderful responses (sarcasm) and the polite discussions (bleeding sarcasm) and the spirit of patience, and acceptance (so sarcastic my eyes are bleeding old scrabbles pieces) that has greeted my every attempt to join a conversation with my "fellow man" I just have one thing to say.
Go straight to hell. I've got more important shit to do from here on out, you damn weirdos. I stayed home from work the other day, and just kind browsed this site throughout the day. There are some of you that live on here. That frightens the fuck out of me. I really can understand the 3 times a week can't afford a game/pc/dinner rant, because it's obvious like 67% of you don't work. and if you do, you should be fired, because you're obviously not doing that good of a job if you have all the time in the world to whine about NOTHING. all damn day on the internet. Gross. BAN ME FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK! IVE HAD ALL I CAN STAND AND I CAN STANDS NO MORE! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
08/25/09
and here you go just for added fun.. doom sucked, descent sucked, orcs and humans sucked, and duke nukem sucked.
08/25/09
08/25/09
In all serious, these are games, videogames made to entertain. You have plumbers battling it out with giant prehistoric dinosaurs, you have all sorts of crazy animals driving carts around, as well as men with incredible electric powers and females with tightly wound space pants. You're NOT suppose to take it seriously I have an inkling your rant up there is more of a reflection of the pressures from your life than from this site. Try to relax and just enjoy this site for what it is. If you're really looking to scream into your air conditioner, take a hint- your body is screaming for a chill pill heh.
08/26/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
It was nearly perfect in every way! It rightfully deserved the 9.0 in OXM (which could have been a 10 if it included online multiplayer).
I, as well as pretty much every serious gamer, ranks this, along with Ico and Beyond Good and Evil to be one of the most underrated games of last-gen.
08/25/09
08/25/09
"We look at all our assets."
Yeah. I'll bet they do.
08/25/09
08/25/09
This deserves like ten of them.
08/25/09
08/25/09
@Slothboy: The juxtaposition made me laugh too.
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
Two letters for you, dear -
VR.
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
You'll spend a LOT of time staring at a pretty similar backside. ;)
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
And, what is the practical purpose of that ass? Ease of movement or something?
Wait... Did I just say ease of movement? Somehow I think someone is going to reply with a bad joke.
08/25/09
I'm not sure you understand how asses work. It's not like she picked that one out of the closet this morning and decided to wear it for "ease of movement." It's her ass, man.
If you had her job, yours might look the same.
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
Glad I'm not alone.
08/25/09
08/25/09
[EDIT]: what am I asking here? WE ALL WIN!
08/25/09
Though I believe that line going down inside didn't really have much of a "reason".
08/25/09
@MrBionic: I dunno. I think Kerrigan still holds the, "Blizzard's Best Asset" crown (c wut i did thar?). Even if the rest of her is a creepy roach woman.
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
What what?
08/25/09
08/25/09
;)
What what in the butt?
08/25/09
08/25/09
Oh also I'm surprised no one mentioned anything about 'assets'. Come on Kotaku, you disappoint...
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09
@mentok1982: Ooooh thanks for the reminder and link.
..And here is a much better pic that was posted to the news page.
08/25/09
Does anyone really want some kind of crazy spandex lining their ass crack?
08/25/09
It had to be done.
08/25/09
Where is that picture from? I see it all the damn time on 4chan and other places, but I missed its origin.
08/25/09
08/25/09
08/25/09