That's because The Final Fantasy Legend—really the first entry in Square Enix's SaGa series—is as glitchy as they come, allowing serious speed run fans the option of beating the game from start to finish in a matter of minutes, not dozens of hours. This tool assisted speed run takes advantage of character and item leveling bugs, as well as the ability to unintentionally warp and ride a motorcycle at super-motorcycle speeds.

The whole thing wraps up nicely when the player dispatches the game's final boss, The Creator (aka God!), with a single hit. Must feel good.

The video really won't be as helpful as the amusingly translated walkthrough from Kevin "Magweasal" Gifford. In it, he explains what the hell is going on amidst the seizure-inducing strobe of Japanese menus. Read it!

The Final Fantasy Legend (Square, 1989) [Magweasel via Tiny Cartridge]

Not for the subject of the above video, lifted from Japanese video sharing site Nico Nico Douga, making it presumably of overseas origin. Yes, the guy gives up the ghost once. Sure, it could probably be done faster. But that blur of hands is more skilled, Marble Madness-wise, than many of us could ever hope to be.

Video via NeoGAF.

According to Vimeo staffers, they don't feel that said game videos that are "direct captures of video game play truly constitute 'creative expression'" and that, frankly, the file sizes are too big and mucking up the works as a result.

There is, of course, more to it than just "you're boring" and "your videos are too big", but you'll have to read on to get the what, when and why.

For those affected, you're likely aware of the alternatives, such as GameVideos, GameTrailers and YouTube, for your game video upload needs. Unfortunately, none of those options have quite the same quality that Vimeo offers.

New Upload Rules [Vimeo]

Anyone who hasn't already worked their way through Portal shouldn't watch this clip. For those who have, you may want to see how handily the final confrontation can be dispatched when approached creatively. Don't worry, it won't take more than a minute of your time.

It's exciting to see hardcore players latch on to the game, exploring 10-second level clearing speed runs and using exploits to find unintended solutions to completing a puzzle sequence. Can't wait to see the future holds for hardcore Portal playing.

It's fun watching old speed runs, not only marveling at the obsessive-compulsiveness of it all, but noticing certain details of gameplay you never noticed before. For example, whenever I play a Mario-like game, I pretty much feel compelled to kill every enemy. But they don't even seem to realize you're there, just happily "Doo doo doo dee doo"ing along, like that anthropomorphic type writer on Sesame Street who liked to fiddle with himself. Florian Eckhardt