Regardless of whether or not your kids believe in Santa Claus, the point is you can't leave your Lancer just laying around for anyone to play with. This, for example, could happen.

And trust me, the last thing you'll want is to be spending your Christmas day mopping up blood (and cookies).

Oh, and make sure the kids aren't around when you click 'play'.

Merry Christmas all you chuckle heads.

Santas come and gone, the presents have all been unwrapped and you've got a good chunk of the day to kill before dinner. Don't tell me you won't be playing at least one video game. So what is it?

Me, I'm going to be spending at least part of the holiday with each of the consoles. I'm thinking Formula 1, Crackdown and Super Swing. Brian Crecente

Apparently, someone has gone to the trouble to make a PC holiday themed game "in the vein of Hideo Kojima's Metal Gear Solid series." It's a grid based game that was created for the Daily Click Grid-Based X-mas game competition. It features Santa in a MGS style 8bit environment using distract tools to get past his enemies.

The site says the game takes about 10-20 minutes to play and has a plot based along those of the original games. Game features include: Full featured AI with sight and hearing, 4 different tools to use, Full voice acting and original music, A GRIPPING PLOT THAT WILL MAKE YOU SWEAT TEARS, and a ranking system that keeps track of statistics throughout the game.

I hope Santa pulls out a really huge gun and mows down all the enemies in a terrifying bloodbath. Or, maybe we could have Resident Santa 4 where you battle zombie Santas in a North Pole gone wrong...

Merry Gear Solid: Secret Santa [total-klik Thanks, Nick]

Ever wonder how Santa Claus manages to work his way down chimneys way too small for him? Or how he seems to stop time in order to visit all of the world's good boys and girls every Christmas morning? LucasArts and TT Games know the answer: Santa Claus is a Jedi Knight whose amazing Force powers allow him to pull off such spectacular feats. A long time ago, he came to us from a galaxy far, far away to exile himself from the Jedi purge led by Darth Vader. (No... that's not official canon.)

Step 1: At the Mos Eisley Cantina, enter the following two codes:

CL4U5H (for Santa hat and red clothes)
TYH319 (for white beard Extra)

Step 2: Go to the Character Customizer and create the proper costume. Use a human head, the appropriate red clothing...and don't forget the red cap! Santa can wield the weapon of your choice — we recommend the green or red lightsaber to seasonally complement his shiny red duds. (Remember, the color of his lightsaber decides whether his Force powers are naughty or nice.)

Step 3: In the Extras menu, activate Disguise 3.

Step 4: Enter the character-based level of your choice in Free Play.

Step 5: Spread holiday cheer to a galaxy in pieces.

This is the last PS3 auction I am ever posting about. I don't care if someone offers my mother's life with a PS3 over eBay and I get offered the world exclusive coverage of the execution. I am done. Let's go out with a bang, shall we? eBay seller mg direct imports has posted a PlayStation 3 auction to end all auctions, and posts about auctions. They are offering not one, not two, but three 60GB PS3 systems, every launch game, and 21 blu-ray movies. They also throw in 3 extra controllers to sweeten the pot.

They won't ship the systems, however. Instead, they will pick you up in a limo of your choice driven by one of Santa's helpers, fly you to a simulated North Pole aboard a Gulf Stream G4, where you will meet Santa and his elves (they specify that they are real elves) and all 9 reindeer.

You get all this for only $2,000,000, which is a great deal considering the real Santa charges $3mil for a visit and expects a happy ending. It gets worse, after the jump

Here are some of the more memorable quotes from the auction.

YOU WILL BE FLYING WITH TWO PROFESSIONAL PIOLTS FOR THE ENTIRE TRIP!!

THERE WILL BE FOOD AND BEVERAGES, TV AND RADIO AVAILABLE TO YOU FOR THIS FLIGHT THAT YOU CAN HELP YOURSELF TO OR BE SERVED BY ONE OF SANTA'S HELPERS IF YOU CHOOSE FOR THEM TO FLY WITH YOU!!

IT ONLY GETS BETTER FROM HERE!! NOW YOU WILL BE DRIVEN TO THE NEAREST AIRPORT TO YOUR HOME OR PLACE OF PICK-UP AND GET ON A PIGGIO AVANTI PLANE AND WE WILL FLY YOU TO TETERBORO AIRPORT IN N.J.

ONCE YOU ARE DONE MEETING EVERYONE, SANTA WILL PUT ON A LIVE SHOW AND TOUR ON HOW THINGS WORK THERE IN THE NORTH POLE DURING X-MAS TIME THE SHOW AND TOUR WILL LAST ABOUT 2 HOURS

I really like how they offer to send Sonic the Hedgehog and Rainbow 6 Vegas to your house via elf if they aren't done by Christmas. Mythical creature or not, you show up at my house bearing the new Sonic the Hedgehog you'll be leaving with a blu-ray case sized object lodged in your rectum.

As far as I am concerned, any PS3 eBay auction from here on out that isn't a straight up console and game offer is just a desperate plea for attention, and not worthy of my time. This one was came dangerously close to that distinction, but I've always had a soft spot for the whole elf / reindeer combo thing. Michael Fahey

3 Sony PlayStation 3 60GB EVERY GAME,DVD FOR PS3 FLY G4 [eBay - Thanks James!]

It's Mortal Kombat, but with a Santa hat and chair throwing and thankfully minus a blood spurting, limb severing, head decapitating fatality. Brian Ashcraft

Tekken with Actual Humans [Kotaku]

The site has also added some temporary Santa Hats and what goes better with a jetpack than a red fur-lined hat?

Jetpacks [City of Heroes]