As a part-timer and the least experienced game writer on this staff, I had my own impressions of E3 which I will write up later, from an outsider's perspective. (I was only there Sunday and Monday). We all work in separate cities, and this event allows us a time to work together, in person. And the Kotaku staff of Fahey, Bash, McWhertor, Leigh, Adam, Maggie and of course, Crecente — with help from Gawker managing editor Noah Robischon in Los Angeles, and Jim Reilly working offsite on multimedia assets — came together like a team of superheroes to put out one hell of a report for you this week. They're all recovering this weekend, but show the Supa-Kotakufriends a little love in the comments.

Highlights
Nintendo Introduces Wii Motion Plus
Xbox Division FINALLY Reports Profitable Year
Tretton: Sony Considering PSP with Harddrive
Mario & Zelda Teams Both "Hard At Work" On Wii Games
The New Xbox Experience: Just The Facts (And Maybe Some Conjecture)
Ladies And Gentlemen, We Have Booth Babes

Much more after the jump.

Liveblogs, News Conferences and Fact Checks:
Liveblogging Microsoft e3 2008 Press Conference
Fact-Checking Microsoft's E3 Presser
Nintendo E3 08 Press Conference Liveblog
Fact-Checking Nintendo's E3 Presser
Sony E3 08 Press Conference Liveblog
Fact-Checking Sony's E3 Presser
Liveblogging Konami's E3 2008 Press Conference
Liveblogging Take-Two's 2008 E3 Press Conference
Capcom E3 08 Press Conference Liveblog - Lost Planet The Movie
Ubisoft E3 08 Press Conference Liveblog
The EA E3 2008 Press Conference In Pictures

Page K Blind Items

New Game Announcements
PS3 "Massive Action Game" Announced; Promises Battles Up to 256 Players
Ratchet and Clank Future: Quest For Booty Announced For PSN
Galaga Gets First True Sequel
Fable II Coming In October
Is Final Fantasy XIII Xbox 360 Coming To Japan? "Ask Them"
Tretton Says No 360 Final Fantasy XIII Coming to Japan
GTA Coming To The DS With China Town Wars
It's Official - Animal Crossing Wii Is Coming

Statements and Executive Speak
Miyamoto: Wii Music Is "Better Than A Video Game"
ESA: This Is The "Golden Age" Of Gaming
ESA Prez Gallagher: Industry Must Not Abandon Its Base
CEO Ben Feder On Turning Things Around At Take-Two
Texas Governor Perry Encourages Game Biz
Exchanging Words With John Schappert
Interview: Catching Up On Microsoft's Big Announcements
Interview: Riccitiello Doesn't Fear Activision Blizzard
Interview: EA Boss Riccitiello Aims To Win You Over
Tretton Explains the Long Road to Home

Non E3
Coming To XBLA: My Frequent Death, Castle Crashers
NCAA 09 Glitch Corrupts Pre-Release Roster Files
Game Marathons: Fad, or Going the Distance?
The Meaning of Ninjy
PS3 Video Service Is Region-Locked

General Coverage:
The Miracle Of Science: Checking Out Monster Lab
DC Universe Online - Opening The Door
Fun With Trivia: Passing Around Buzz! Master Quiz
Bionic Commando Has Control Issues
Damnation - One To Watch
Portal Still Alive Will Include New Puzzles, But No New Plot
MadWorld - Black, White, And Red All Over
Silent Hill: Homecoming Gets Pyramid Head, PC Version
How Power Outages and WTO Protests Influenced inFamous
Alpha Protocol - Mass Effect For The Solo Spy Set
Flock: Sheep Death In A Toy World
Sonic Unleashed: Half Classic, Half Stretchy Werewolf
Rethinking Kids' Games: Disney Interactive At E3
Jizz Mopping Through The Dildo Wonderland
Bayonetta - Beware The Hair Dragons
Resident Evil 5: Killing Zombies WIth My Best Girl
Not Excited About Lips? Maybe You Should Be
Wii Sports Resort Will Sell Like Hotcakes, Hands-on Impressions
Free Realms - The Best MMO At E3?
Funcom - Age Of Conan Reviewable In A Month
Flower - Petals On The Wind
Rock Band 2: Perfecting The Game
Left 4 Dead May Get Machinima Maker Post Launch
Hands On: Spore On iPhone Is Pretty Much FlOw
Sega: No Plans For Shenmue III, Seaman 2
John Riccitiello, Little Sister Killer
Sony Announce New $200 PSP Bundle
PS2 "Family Value Pack" Is Indeed Good Value
Wii Music Impressions
The New 80GB PS3: Just The Conjecture (And Maybe Some Facts)
Why A Castlevania Fighting Game? Ask Iga!
Dead Space Producer Chuck Beaver Talks Survival Horror In Halo's Era
Hands On With Castlevania Judgment
LittleBigPlanet Sorta Dated, Slightly Delayed
Carmack Talks: From id/EA to Mac gaming and PS3 Programming
More DS Strumming - Guitar Hero On Tour Decades
id Leave Activision For EA
Microsoft Releasing LE Red, Green 360 Controllers
Guitar Hero News From MS Presser - Van Halen, The Eagles, Metallica
Fallout 3 Getting Exclusive Downloadable Content For Xbox 360 And PC
Visited E3 Hall... In Intensive Care
First Peek At E3 2008 (Boxes And Furniture Crap)
Microsoft Announce 60GB 360, Confirm 20GB Price-Cut

Among the guests will be weekend warriors Maggie Greene, plus yours truly (in the I Heart Hot Moms shirt from the GTA:DUI video). Also appearing are Brian Crecente, Brian Ashcraft and Mike McWhertor. You'll also be able to catch up with Leigh Alexander and Mike "Mountain Man" Fahey, plus Intern Adam Barenblat, who interrupted me amidst a phone call with a ladyfriend last night and now must buy me a beer. (What, that cost me $5.99 a minute. Damn right I'm making the intern pay.)

The thing kicks off at 8 p.m., when the place opens, and we will, for a time, have an open bar. The place isn't gigantic, and in Tokyo we managed to burst Mother at the seams, so you may want to try and get there on the nose.

If you plan on making it, make sure to obtain a wristband from one of us once you arrive for the free drinks. The party is 21 and older only, unfortunately. Sorry.

Golden Gopher

Body Types: Why Ivy's Boobs Are Such A Big, Big Deal
Will Sony Inflict Massive Damage At E3 08?
Rare Denies X-Waggle Rumor, Chastises Kotaku Comments
Inside The 169-Page Thompson Report: Judge Recommends $43k Fine Also
Nintendo's E3 Lineup - Oh, So Quiet
Kotaku's E3 2008 Predictions
Leaked Screens Of Duke Nukem 3D XBLA
Rock Band 2 Features Drum Trainer, Wireless Instruments, Full Backwards Compatibility
This Wii Hard Drive Is So Damn Phony (And Funny)
GameStop's Leaked Xbox 360 Price Drop Info
2.41 Firmware Brings New PS3 Platinum Trophy
Hands-On The Force Unleashed Impressions

Xbox 360 Price Drop Already In Effect At Target Stores?
Motus: It's Up To The Console-Makers To Make Motion Control Announcements
The PC At E3 - The Keyboard And Mouse Brigade
Kotaku's Pre-E3 Party
Circuit City To Offer $30 Gift Card With Price Dropped 360
Activision Blizzard Merger Finalized
Riot Games Get a $7M Launch
Microsoft Denies Motion Control Revealed Via Banjo Kazooie Preview
The E3 2008 Kotaku Fantasy Betting Pool
Frankenreview: Sid Meier's Civilization Revolution
Thompson: Judge Recommends Permanent Disbarment
EA's Steve Schnur Explains The Hype Behind The Madden Soundtrack
What's Coming From Microsoft At E3?
How's Wii Skate It? We Skate It To Find Out
Game Club Beyond Good & Evil: Discussion One
Cyan Outlines "Hurdles" In Reclaiming Myst Online
The Five Finalists For Kotaku's New Comment Czar
E3: Dud or a Blast?

If this sounds like you, hit the jump for the cleaner, but still packed to the gills with jiggles version.

Harmless, really. The uncensored version, which has some harsh reality on film, is at Zoo.com. It's SOOOOO NSFW.

Emma Frain Wii Fit Topless! [Zoo]

Among the guests will be Kotaku's own Maggie Greene and Owen Good as well as such surely editor types as Brian Ashcraft and Mike McWhertor. You'll also be able to catch up with Leigh Alexander and Mike "Mountain Man" Fahey. I'll be around as well, probably demanding things of Intern Adam, like having him fetch me sammiches.

The thing kicks off at 8 p.m., when the place opens, and we will, for a time, have an open bar. The place isn't gigantic, and in Tokyo we managed to burst Mother at the seams, so you may want to try and get there on the nose.

Give a shout out in comments if you plan on making it and make sure to obtain a wristband from one of us once you arrive for the free drinks. Oh, 21 and older only, unfortunately. Sorry.

Golden Gopher

ooio [via Gizmodo]

Here for your approval and general discussion our the top five Kotaku commenters. I'll be posting a poll on Monday and then, after discussion with the other Kotaku writers, announcing the new Comment Czar on Tuesday.

If you're on the list and don't want to wield the mighty banhammer for some bizarre reason make sure to drop me a line and I'll cut you from the list.

EnigmaNemesis
TheIrishNinja
Spoony Bard
PapaBear434
DaiMacculate

Hit the jump to vote. And remember, we still have the final say.

Don't forget the first Beyond Good & Evil Game Club meets tonight. We're testing out some new software that has no limits and allows for some pretty decent comment controls. Make sure to check back at 7:30 p.m. Mountain Time tonight to discuss our first assignment. If you forgot to play check out the link and get on it. It took me about an hour to get to where I needed to be.

Game Club Beyond Good & Evil First Assignment

• Up in Ohio, a guy confesses to his roommate that he killed a guy and invokes the Xbox 360 defense. According to the defendant, the victim was trying to steal his Xbox 360. An Ohio TV station reports on a transcript of the 911 call. It doesn't sound like it was a burglar, either, more likely that they knew each other and got in an argument. Anyway, one is dead, the other faces murder charges and potentially the death penalty. Why can't people pick something prosaic, like a stamp collection, when trying to cop out of a homicide?

• In the UK, a 40-man homicide unit is looking for the person or persons responsible for the grisly knifing deaths of two French exchange students. The Mirror — so, consider the source — says "the two may have been butchered for a pair of games consoles," as two PSPs (and not just PSPs, but "black PSPs" because they're so uncommon) were taken from the scene. I think the fact the victims were stabbed more than 250 times speaks more to a motive for the crime than the theft of £260 worth of electronics.
Brutal Murdered Pair May Have Been Killed for Playstation [The Mirror]
911 Call Released in Fatal Springfield Shooting [WHIO-TV, via GamePolitics ]

That's right, four score and seven years ago today at Valley Forge, John F. Kennedy and the Lone Ranger chopped down the cherry tree that Squanto ate at the first Thanksgiving, and Paul Revere hung a light in the Alamo to alert Teddy Roosevelt's Rough Riders: "N00B, red team has taken teh control point, FAIL." Then Batman crossed the Atlantic in an X-Wing Fighter to accept the Heisman Trophy from Winston Churchill, and Martin Luther King Jr. said "God bless us, every one of us."

Oh wait, today's July 5th. Shit.

Well, for those in the USophile-speaking world, this is a three day weekend and you should still be burning large amounts of animal flesh on a grill for the next two days, or else you hate freedom. And for that reason, Kotaku's U.S. staff is on an abbreviated schedule today and tomorrow. Our updates will come every two hours today and tomorrow, then it's back to full-strength when Luke Plunkett and the freedom-hating Australians take up the cause late Sunday evening. Until then, I regret that I have but these stories (more after the jump) to give to my country:

Battlefield: Bad Company Review: Going For The Gold
Once a Labor of Love, Sales of Football Rosters Now Inflame Passions
Former CEO Of Struggling Atari Got One Hell Of A Golden Parachute
Is Chrono Trigger DS Coming To America?
Xbox 360 Getting a 3D Dashboard Make-Over?
Too Human Hands-On: Six Hours In And Half-Way Home
The Man Behind Diablo III Talks Plot, Lore and Battle.Net

Playfire Launches PS3 Trophies Gamercard Service
Best Buy Ad Shows Xbox 360 Price Drop
Can You Really Win A Wii As A Carnival Prize?
Ninja Gaiden II Mission Mode Coming This Month
Come Party With Kotaku
Call of Duty: World at War Figures Show Off U.S., Brit Might
Too Human Online Co-op Hands On: Does Double The Baldur Mean Double The Fun?
Alpha Protocol Aims Ambitiously For RPG, FPS Fans
Frankenreview: Battlefield: Bad Company (Xbox 360)
Infogrames-Controlled Atari Gets 49 Percent Of Publishing Revenues From DBZ
Devil May Explode BAM! BOOM! POW!
George Romero Clueless About Dead Rising?
Minority Report Designer Behind New, Motion-Controlled 360 GUI?
Aussie 360 Price Cut Official, Now Cheaper Than Wii<br />
Pachter: Rumored Xbox 360 Price, Feature Set Sprucing Could Squeeze Sony'
Game Club Beyond Good & Evil: The First Assignment
GameTap: Myst Pass-Back Benefits Fans
Sporelebrity Contest Kicks Off
Playing Spore: A Lesson in Teabagging
First Look At FIFA 09, PS3 Gets Exclusive "Game Mode"
Bling Gnome Pays Visit with Golden Offering
I Meet The Band, Get Sauced At The GH: Aerosmith Launch Party
Neil Young Launches iPhone Games Company
List of First PS3 Trophy Supported Games
$299 Price Drop Xbox 360 Is Refurbish? (Bwah?) [Updated]
Blizzard Worldwide Invitational: Level 70 Elite Tauren Chieftain Level Up
Blizzard Worldwide Invitational: “There Is No Penguin Level.”
Blizzard Worldwide Invitational: Day One
Blizzard Worldwide Invitational: How Much Is Your Goody Bag Worth?
Blizzard Worldwide Invitational: Diablo III In-Depth

Among the guests will be Kotaku's own Maggie Greene and Owen Good as well as such surely editor types as Brian Ashcraft and Mike McWhertor. You'll also be able to catch up with Leigh Alexander and Mike "Mountain Man" Fahey. I'll be around as well, probably demanding things of Intern Adam, like having him fetch me sammiches.

The thing kicks off at 8 p.m., when the place opens, and we will, for a time, have an open bar. They place isn't gigantic, and in Tokyo we managed to burst Mother at the seams, so you may want to try and get there on the nose.

Give a shout out in comments if you plan on making it and make sure to obtain a wristband from one of us once you arrive for the free drinks.

Golden Gopher

Starbucks closing hundreds of stores [KING5, thanks Ryan!]

I went to a horror movie convention here in Chicago on Sunday because George Romero was due to show up for autograph signing and I was hoping he would grace my copy of Dead Rising with his signature (not expecting that he would at all). Lo and behold he actually did, and on top of that, he was not even aware of Dead Rising...i had to explain to him what it was and he was happy to sign it. Makes me wonder if he is even aware of the legal battles Capcom has had to endure.

Makes us wonder, too. If you can't read what Romero wrote, it is: "Tyler Stay Scared George Romero."

This Samsung Xbox 360 TV Looks Fake (But It's Not A Bad Idea)
Sony's Stringer Foresees Profitability This Year
First Shots Of PS3 Video Download Service, Due In "Summer 2008"
Crave's ESA Departure Due To Impending Acquisition
Increasing PS3 Sales, Strong PSP Helped Sony Narrow Losses In FY08
Console War Has Changed, PS2 Declines In Old Age
Hands On With Ultimate Band: Disney's Peripheral-Free Band Game

More highlights after the jump.

Survey Leaks Guitar Hero IV Playable Rockers Including Hendrix, Ozzy, And Sting
Rock Band 2 To Get A Jolt Of AC/DC, Survey Says
Will Half-Life 2: Episode Three Be At E3? Valve Says 'No'
I Beat Harry Potter's Executive Producer In A Wand Duel
Actually, Zubo Is Fun For All Ages
Blizzard Splashwatch Day Five - Death Knights, Protoss, And Purple Penguins
Hirai: "True Generation" PS3 Titles To Come
Frankenreview: Alone In The Dark (Xbox 360)
A Terrifying Glimpse Into The Future Of The Halo Franchise?
Square Enix Classics Start Hitting Japanese PSN
ESA Responds To Crave Departure
Red Alert 3's Cocktail Menu
Skate It Wii May Get Skateboard Frame for Balance Board
NECA's Ninja Gaiden II Figure
MGS4 Ships A Million In Europe
Left 4 Dead Impressions: Sloppy Seconds
Hasbro Family Game Night Invades the Wii
Industry Apologetics: It's Not Just A Game
Sony Lost Over $3 Billion To PS3 Cost, Pricing Imbalance
Zubo Hands-On Impressions
Gabe Newell: Left 4 Dead is All About Directing Action
Call Of Duty 5 Screens, Details (4-Player Co-Op)
PSN Cards FINALLY Hitting Stores

Untitled [Spinooti]

Sunday's major security breakdown in a marketing research firm's website opened up a flood of info and set Kotaku Originals off to a strong start early in the week. McWhertor then came up for air from leak coverage to give you a full breakdown of the epic (in scope, and in length) Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots.

Also, Tecmo asked everyone to be extraspecialcareful with rumors, and denied Team Ninja is bolting and suing everyone in sight, expecting that to be the end of that. Bash responded by digging up lawsuit docs and other reportage, with voluminous translation, that shows, yes, this is in fact about more than two semigruntled coders.

Major news week here at Kotaku, people. It pays to stay informed, and here's a roundup in case you missed anything. Full list follows highlights after the jump.

Hard Proof That Tecmo Japan Is Lying? (This Seems Like It)
Tecmo Says Team Ninja Exodus Rumors False, Calls Out U.S. Media
Microsoft: Leaked Concepts "May Or May Not" Be Real Products
Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots Review: Kept You Waiting, Huh?
SCEE: We're Dedicated To Our First Party Studios, No Problems Here
Legal Mess Over Euro Alone In The Dark Reviews
"DS Hardware Demand Has Now Peaked Globally, Software Downturn To Follow"
EA: Best Of Luck To Former EALA Head Young In Amicable Parting

Civilization Revolution Review: Compromise, Or Compromised?
Guitar Hero World Tour Drum Controller Outdoes Rock Band
Guitar Hero World Tour First Look
Pac-Man T-Shirt Spreads The WordTake-Two Settles FTC Compliance Issues In EA Bid
Sporepedia: 350,000 And Counting
My Trip To Ninjatown
Russian Gaijins Go Anime-Style With X-Blades
Behind Enemy Lines With Velvet Assassin
Source: Leaked "Crucible" Is Oblivion Designer's New Console RPG
Riccitiello: Take-Two Bid Focused On Holiday Season, Not GTA IV
RZA Keen To Checkmate New Wu-Tang Game
No End In Sight: EA Extends Take-Two Offer Again
NECA's Gears Of War: Series 2
Wii Update 3.3 Kills Freeloader Too?
Alrighty Kids, Pick The Best Snake Stache
Blast Works Review: Build, Trade And Destroy
Massive Leaks Are Rumors, Says Marketing Company Responsible
Interview: D3P's Takenaka Talks Coraline Game, Universal Pictures Agreement
Microsoft/Activision News Leak: The Round-Up
XNA Games "Most Likely Less Expensive" Than XBLA Ones
You Don't Know Jack Probably Announced For The Wii
Racing Equity Probably Announced
New Tony Hawk Game To Employ Motion-Controlled Peripheral?
Microsoft Avatars Will Be Playable, Licensed?
Marvel: Ultimate Alliance II Details, Platforms
Powers & Titans Probably Announced For 360, PS3, PC
Rumor: "Trioxide" To Allow Console Games To Be Played On PC?

In Bed With The Pets: Aaron Greenberg, Part II [Das Gamer]

Even if you've never played WoW, it's a well written narrative, covering the moral implications and the actual risks of paying someone in a sweatshop to play a game so you can enjoy features and abilities you didn't earn. And the conclusion could pass for any awkward reminder of a purely transactional relationship with another person. And if you do play and you're considering powerleveling, it's a great explanation of what to expect.

And I'm not sure what our policy is, but Kotaku AU ran a disclaimer that, just to cover the bases, should be repeated here.

Disclaimer: Kotaku AU does not advocate the use of powerlevelling services, or the use of any service that violates the Terms of Use or End User License Agreements (EULA) of any game. If you decide to indulge in any such service, you do so at your own risk.

Pros And Cons Of WoW Powerlevelling, Part 1
Pros And Cons Of WoW Powerlevelling, Part 2
Pros And Cons Of WoW Powerlevelling, Part 3

Where the fuck were we? Oh yes, our originals coverage. Here it is. Another big week in Kotakopolis. Enjoy.

Be the King of Kotaku Commenters
Interview: Pachter Says Console Sales Still OK, But Expect Holiday Price Drops
SCEA Has No Plans To Offer Sixaxis Bundles In North America
Lunchtime With The Brothers Chap: Strong Bad's Creators Speak And Eat
No Place For Hideo: MGS 4's Hidden Themes
Rumor: Details On Sony's Motion Controls, No "Break-Apart"
Frankenreview Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns Of The Patriots
Return of the Game Club
Gunmetal PS3: The Unboxing
Do We Have Our First Rock Band II Artist?
Checking Out Rise of the Argonauts
Spore's Fruit Fucker, Or Why I Love the Creature Creator
Stan Lee, Ellijah Wood, Carlos Santana... and Crecente Duke it Out With Spore's Creature Creator
Our Metal Gear Solid 4 Review In Beta, Pushed Back
Bangai-O Spirits Circumvents DS Codes, Blows Minds
Get Paid To Comment and Ban
Hideo Kojima At NYC's Metal Gear Solid 4 Midnight Launch
Metal Gear Solid 4 Japan Launch - Osaka
Early Impressions: Crash - Mind Over Mutant On Wii
Early Impressions: Ghostbusters
Become Kotaku's Next King of Comments
The Incredible Hulk Review: The Beast Within
Take-Two Gets Into FTC Pissing Match
Metal Gear Solid Twin 'Staches!
Zelnick: Take-Two Experimenting With Microtransactions
More Details On Portal 2's Bad Guy
Interview: Turbine Confirms Console Project, Talks Future Plans
Impressions: My Pokemon Ranch
Interview: Flagship Studios On Life After Hellgate Launch
Hands On With Eternity's Child
Ninja Gaiden II Review: Swan Song or Death Knell?
Pachter: GTA IV So Did Not Drive Console Sales
Rumor: Casting Call Reveals Portal 2 Details?
Metal Gear Mustache Maniacs!
Digital Legends Bring 3D Fantasy To The iPhone
Pangea Bringing Enigmo And Cromag Rally To iPhone
Want to buy Metal Gear Solid 4? Head to Kuwait.

Have no fear though, I didn't forget you Game Clubbers, in fact I was working behind the scenes to line up some changes to the club to make it a bit easier for more people to participate and to bring in someone who can help kick off what I hope will become each month's new game. (More to come on that soon, I hope)

Today I can announce that we will be bringing Game Club back starting July 1. Our first title? To kick things off on the right foot we're going with Kotaku pick Beyond Good & Evil.

Now don't jump the gun and start playing it now, if you haven't already. The whole idea of Game Club is for it to be a shared experience. Expect more details coming out over the next couple of weeks as I finalize everything, but until then here are the Game Club's rules.

The publisher handed out 50 or so copies of the Spore Creature Creator to a bunch of celebrities (and me) and asked them to create a single, marvelous creature. This eclectic selection of creatures will then be posted on an Electronic Arts site for people to vote on next week. The winner gets $15,000 donated to the charity of his or her choice.

I've been able to cobble together a short list of some of the folks I'm competing against:

Stan Lee
Richard Branson
David Lynch
Ellijah Wood
Kevin Rose
Mark Cuban
Curt Schilling
Kent Nichols
Robert Scoble
Veronica Belmont
Carlos Santana
Bijou Phillips
Flight of the Conchords

Good thing none of these people are rich, powerful or creative... man I'm screwed. Maybe I should take the low road and create a giant penis creature? Neah, it's too much fun making abominations to God.

Become Kotaku's Next King of Comments [Kotaku]

So we're on the prowl for a comments moderator of sorts, a gatekeeper to Kotaku Tower, if you will. Someone who will prowl the posts and comments on a daily basis, weeding out the bad, helping out the conversation, anointing new readers.

We can only pay $200 a month for your help, but you do get to wield the mighty banhammer and will be given the keys to the commenting gates. If you remain interested, hit the jump for how to apply. Yes, there is a contest (of sorts) involved.

This is how it's going to work. On June 30, we're going to beg our tech geniuses to track down the five Kotaku commenters with the most followers. The top five who want to do this will all then have to explain, in comments, why they should be made the commenting czar. We'll use our own good judgment, and a pinch of public sentiment, to elect the new czar who will also rule for a six month stint, unless the trolls get him or her first.

There's really no way to get a follower other than by getting other people decide to follow your comments. They do that by logging in and then clicking on the little plus sign symbol next to your comment in a post. Of course your followers will all have to be commenters, so make sure they sign up on the site.

If we catch you cheating we'll kick you out of the contest. So play nice. Don't even attempt to cheat.

Ps. Yes, that's Witz in the video.

Edit: Yes I changed the headline. I agonized for hours over how to pun that one, and it just now came to me. Carry on.

Analyst: LucasArts Layoffs About EA, Studio Politics
LucasArts Confirms Layoffs, Says The Dev Is Still Healthy
Zelnick: We're "Actively Engaged" In Talking To Potential Acquirers
Breaking: First GTA IV Episodic DLC To Come To Xbox 360 In Q1 09
ESA Talks Problems, Perceptions, Promises
Jack Thompson Walks Out On Hearing, Court Recommends Enhanced Disbarment

Turnin' Around: Highlights From THQ's Press Event
The Olympic Gamers
Why My GRID Review Is Late
Rumor: Ex-Lucasarts Staffer Talks KOTOR 3, More Indy, Wii Lightsaber Game
Rumor: LucasArts Sees Massive Layoffs, Outsources Jobs
Eww, Cool! Deadly Creatures Impressions
Awwwww, Look At Him: Checking Out Wall-E
SpongeBob Drawn To Life Like Drawn To Life, But With SpongeBob
First Impressions Of Viva Pinata: Pocket Paradise
Strong Bad's Cool Game Slips To July
Zelnick: Expect BioShock Film Alongside BioShock 3
GTA IV Sold 8.5 Million, Shipped 11 Million So Far
Rainbow Connection: Hands On With De Blob
LEGO Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures Review: Whip it, Whip it Good
Impressions: Lock's Quest Mixes Old-School With Innovative Ideas
So What's Our Metal Gear Solid 4 Surprise?
Kojima Productions Responds to MGS4 NDA Complaints
Kojima Productions Says "No MGS4 90 Minute Cutscenes"
Fishy Copies Of MGS4 Already In British Hands
EA, FTC Agree On Take-Two Bid Deadline, Another Extension Likely
Frankenreview, Lego Indiana Jones (Xbox 360)
TECMO: Itagaki's Last Day is July 1, Team NINJA Still Developing
Sony Make In-Game Ad Deal Official
Tecmo Responds To Itagaki
Guitar Hero: Metallica Doesn't Affect Rock Band's Plans
Resident Evil 5 Not Redesigned After Race Criticism, Says Producer
In "Creatively Dead" Industry, Change Comes From The Outside
About Kotaku Reviews
Interview: Halo Designer Leaves Bungie For Academia
Microsoft Thanks Itagaki For Years of Support
Penny Arcade Adventures: On The Rain-Slick Precipice Of Darkness Review
Hands-On With Street Fighter IV: The Final Arcade Version
Why You Should Comment On Kotaku
Dark Void Gameplay Impressions
Bionic Commando Hands-On Impressions
First Resident Evil 5 Gameplay Impressions
Japan Gets The Blue PSP As Well
Japan Gets A New, Red PS2
Itagaki Leaving Tecmo, Suing Tecmo
Missed Darkrai? You Might Have Another Shot
Hands On With Guitar Hero: Aerosmith
Metal Gear Solid 4 Shibuya Billboards
The Video Game Defense That Wasn't

Whilst I was waiting, I readied my Metal Gear Solid collection to get signed.

I went up on the platform where it was my turn to get my sleeve signed. I get my collection out, only to be told by some random HMV employee who was supervising the signing that I'm only allowed to get the sleeve signed. I didn't know how to take it. So I just took out my sleeve, got it signed and shook Hideo Kojima, Yoji Shinkawa and Yumi Kikuchi (Raging Raven) hands. Which kind of made it better.

I wanted to take a quick picture of me with Hideo Kojima, so I shook Hideo's hand whilst my brother who came with me took a picture. For some reason, the man supervising the singing on the platform tried to stop my brother taking the picture, saying that no pictures allowed. But luckily my brother managed to take the picture before he could stop him.So now I couldn't take a picture of my brother and Hideo, which could be the first and last time they meet.

Very disappointing. I traveled such a long way, carried a very heavy bag of MGS games for nothing? It could be the last time I meet the man, and I've already gone through a long process of waiting, might as well sign all the games and let me at least take a decent picture.

Signatures after the jump.

Kojima In London [MATTYBLOG]

Just to let y'all know, I seriously thought about pouring Lipton iced tea into an Early Times bottle and releasing a video of me downing two 16 ounce glasses of it in succession. But that would make me feel like Nicholas Cage in Leaving Las Vegas and after the thrilling conclusion to GTA: DUI, figured you could do without the self-pity and self-destruction, however staged.

Anyway, here's the week that was in Kotaku original reporting. Crecente doubled up on Wii Fit and tripled up on Far Cry 2; Fahey swooned over Age of Conan. Even if you didn't, something might pique your interest. Give it a look.

SITE Refutes Fallout 3 Goof, Is Not "Red-Faced"
Wii Fit Review: An Identity Crisis
Raving Prince, Assassin and Fischer Rabbids
Pokemon Pizza Party
Grants Awarded For Inspiring Health Games Research
Far Cry 2 Dev and Port Teams Range from 175 to Three
Making Far Cry 2's Africa
Brothers In Arms: Hell's Highway Hands-On
Far Cry 2: No Girls Allowed
Prince of Persia Ditches Roots, Gets a Final Fantasy Make-Over
Shaun White: Wii Play, Pics and Press Release
Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X. Hands-On
Ubisoft Officially Announces Beyond Good & Evil 2
Shaun White Delivers Death to Snowboarding with an Assassin's Creed Engine
Far Cry 2 Brings GTA Sandbox to the Serengeti
And Now, The Metal Gear Solid 4 Soundtrack
Grand Theft Auto: DUI
Yes, Age Of Conan Is Having Problems
Wii Fit: Innovation in Gaming or Marketing?
Korea Getting That "Very, Very" Limited Edition MGS4 Pack, Too!
Square Enix President Laying Down The Law
Age Of Conan - My New Best Friend
Let Me Show You The Dragon Balls
Square Enix Lose Money, Need More Greenbacks
PSN Cards Must Hit Soon
Who Teases a Teaser, Anyway?

The week in original copy:

G4, Gamespy, Gamestats Reporting Imaginary VC Soul Blazer
Nintendo Not Attending Leipzig This Year
Capcom Looks Into Crystal Ball, Makes Resident Evil 5 Sales Prediction
Nolan Bushnell Looks To Social Gaming, "Holodeck Come True"
First Look At Kristin Kreuk As Chun-Li?
Ubisoft Profits Surge On Rainbow Six, Rayman
Whorelore Incites The Rage Of Bonan
GameStop Reveals New Stores, Top 5 Q1 Sellers
Dead Space: Hands-On Impressions
Pachter Earns Financial Times' Number One Award
Sonic Unleashed Impressions
Which Publishers Can Think Globally, Act Globally?
Bethesda Teams with Splash Damage
PS3 Guitar Hero Gets Free God Of War Song
Frankenreview, Haze (PS3)
Age Of Conan Impressions
Capcom: Console Expansion, Gas Prices Hurting Arcade Biz
Shareholders Stick With Take-Two
Europe Gets Three New DS Colours
Xbox Live "Gay" Crackdown MIGHT Be Getting A Little Out Of Hand
Wii Fit Going For Silly Prices, To Silly People, On Ebay
Haze Review: It Sure Beats Pumping Gas
SOCOM Confrontation: Sixaxis, Running and Armor Bring Slight Changes
Wii Fit Shipments Late? Not Exactly
Controlling Content in LittleBigPlanet or You Got Your Penis On My SackBoy
WiiWare Launches In Europe/Australia, Gets Demos With A Catch
My First Steps Into The Age Of Conan
The Dog Island Promotes Puppy Piracy
ESA Spent $5 Million To Move E3 For a Year
Creating My Own Level In LittleBigPlanet
Ted Price Talks Resistance 2, We Go Hands on With Multiplayer

Back in 2005 when I was hating my job and casting about for meaning in life, I wrote Crecente and asked him what the process was for writing up and selling a game concept. Was it at all comparable to, say, pitching a book proposal or a screenplay? Not really, because there is plenty enough work generated by in-house creative teams, and outside licensing deals.

That said, even though I have zero coding skills and no game development acumen, I thought I had a few good ideas. So, in the first of what I hope will become a semi-regular feature (which means, I'll do more, but maybe not each week) here is the Kotaku Video Game Pitch for a concept I call "Noise." Yes, it was inspired somewhat by true-to-life events, from a time when I really thought I was going insane.

Working title: Noise
Genre: Third-person shooter, action-stealth
Setting: A sizeable if nondescript North American city, its suburbs and an office park; neighborhoods and buildings of varying density. Quasi sandbox with confined environments and some freeplay/side mission capabilities.
Tone: Action/Comedy
Probable ESRB Rating: Let's go ahead and say M, for violence, language, adult themes and chihuahua punting.

The story: You are Eugene Twerpley, a scrawny, geeky, whiny computer programmer who has just taken a new job in a big city after years of working out in the middle of nowhere. You were raised by cartoonishly loud parents in a home that doubled as the family business — a combination 300-dog kennel and trap-shooting range out in hillbilly country. Thus you have a painful sensitivity, both psychological and physical, to loud noises, which make you jumpy, tense, and prone to extremely — extremely — irrational behavior. And you have just moved in next to the worst neighbors, in the worst neighborhood in a total dump of a city.

Game progression: Noise is a mission-based game. You'll respond to provocations and attempt to work out solutions. Essentially, you will be taking revenge on people and things that piss you off — always passive aggressively. Missions will be triggered in "Noise" not by a traditional in-game notification, but by, literally, a noise. As you move about your environment, you'll hear certain things — nearly all of them annoying to your character (if not to the gamer, literally). Moving closer to the source makes them louder and more obnoxious. You'll have to find a way to shut them up, with the game providing expository help on how to do it. But asking someone to keep it down never works, just triggers a humorous/insulting cutscene.

Among many possible missions ideas, you'll sabotage construction equipment, cut power to loud neighbors, sic the cops on other people for completely bogus offenses. Best of all, you will blow up a car whose alarm won't shut off. With a rocket launcher. That's gotta be a cathartic experience for everyone. As your exploits get more grandiose and destructive you are evicted, forced to move (changing the game environment) before finally you have to move back in with your parents ...

Unique gameplay: The noise-meter affects your character's attributes (and, ultimately, his descent into madness). The longer a noise goes on, the more frustrated your character becomes, which reduces (or zeroes out) options for completing a mission via stealth. But it also boosts his physical characteristics (a somewhat limited rage mode) that allows him to get the job done by brute force.

Selling points: Humor, music, realistic sound, unique level design, story.
Platforms: Consoles/PC. Not a good idea on handhelds, I think.

So, feel free to comment on the viability of this concept. You can also vote in any of the three polls below. Maybe it's a little rough, maybe we can make it better. Maybe someone will buy it and make us — oh shit, I think Gawker owns this work product. This might be a short lived feature.

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

Next concept: "Rad"

ESA Confirms LucasArts Exit
CBS Snags GameSpot In $1.8 Billion CNET Acquisition
Sony Announces 2008 and Early 2009 PS3 Line-up
EA Makes Three-Year Growth Plan, Quits Quarterly Guidance
Interview: Playboy Cyber Girl of the Year Is A True Player

Interview: Frontier Hopes LostWinds Breezes In More WiiWare Innovation
Sonic Chronicles: The Dark Brotherhood Hands-On
Former SEGA Idol Opens Meat House
Meet Sony's New Phil Harrison
Talking To The DBZ: Burst Limit Demo
Madworld: A Fun Romp Through Dismemberment
Microsoft, Here is Your Number One Customer
The Best Worst Game URL On The Internet Right Now
Waitin' Until Friday: Where Things Stand On EA-T2
Two Humans' Hands On with Too Human
Penny Arcade Game Impressions
Viva Pinata: Trouble in Paradise and Pinata Vision Impressions
Fable 2: A Glimpse at the Beginning and A Co-Op Surprise to Come
Banjo Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts Hands-On Impressions
Second Level Gears of War 2 Play Through
So... Will There Be Another Metal Gear Solid?
It's Sony Financials Time (incl. PlayStation Sales Data)
Yup, The PS2 Is Still Buttering EA's Bread
New MGS4 Screens Want To Sell You Things
Itagaki: No More Ninja Gaiden, This Was My Swan Song
EA's Riccitiello Still Sees PC Opportunities
EA's Riccitiello Talks "Holographic" Madden Interface, No Need For Take-Two
Battlefield Heroes: Hands-On Impressions
Skate It Wii Hands-On Impressions
Battleforge Impressions
Left 4 Dead Hands-On Impressions
Acquisitions Cause $454 Million In Losses For EA In Fiscal 08
Shane Kim: Rare Hasn't Realized Their Potential on the 360
Gears of War 2 Getting Meat Shields, But Does it Need Romance Too?
Take A Look At Uniqlo's New MGS4 Shirts
You Really Did Get Assassin's Creed In My MGS4!
Presser Start!
Metal Gear Movie Update
If You Can't Beat 'Em, Join 'Em: Using Facebook For The Games Industry
Where In The World Is Brian Crecente?
Talking Over LostWinds WiiWare
What Would Be Your Perfect VC Update?
Rare: Just Hang On, Banjo 3's No Racer!
The Games My Mother Played
What Game Makes You Pull Your Hair Out?
Niko Bellic's San An Flight Priced By Airways

So, uh, here's your reading list. Komrade Kayce, please pass these out to the rest of the class. Thank you. Be prepared to discuss the nature of symbolism, specifically themes regarding coping with death, in "My PlayStation 2.5". Now, let me pour a mug from this thermos that is absolutely nothing but coffee and don't you little bastards dare suggest otherwise or spread rumors.

On another note, does anyone have any useful or economical suggestions for doing console video-game footage captures onto a Macintosh (with no RCA video board input)? I've tried the Pinnacle "Dazzle" video transfer for Mac. It's a piece of shit. Can't even get a signal. This question is germane to something Adam Barenblat and I hope to deliver next weekend.

My PlayStation 2.5
EA Takes Out $1 Billion Loan For Take-Two Acquisition
Call of Duty 5 Already Playable
echochrome Review: Poppin', Lockin' and Thinkin'
Gran Turismo: 50 Million Served
Rumor: Microsoft May Debut New Xbox 360 Motion Controller Next Week
Battle of the Bands Review: Musical Smackdown
Wii Nintendo Channel Video Walkthrough
Analyst: Record GTA Sales Change Nothing For EA's "80/20" Take-Two Bid
A 70-year-old's Take on GTA IV
Sony PlayStation Day London '08 Roundup
Boom Blox Review: Explosive Casual Play
Target: Terror Review: 90s Arcade Action