I totally would have cannonballed into that pile.

SEGA's Office Pranks [YouTube, big hat tip thanks to Nightwheel]

According to the newest issue of Game Informer magazine, Enslaved is a "post-apocalyptic journey" and.... well, that's about all we know about the game. We're sure there's much more to it than that, but the magazine's cover seems far more interested in revealing details on Iron Man 2. Oh, I'm sorry, I meant Crackdown 2.

GI does make mention of Crackdown 2's multiplayer modes — four-player co-op and 16-player competitive matches, they tease — but doesn't offer much more than a bit about the game having a "dark new story."

October Issue Revealed [Game Informer]

In a statement to TG Daily, Microsoft said:

Microsoft stands behind the Xbox 360 as a superior entertainment console with one of the best warranties in the industry. We are constantly improving the design, manufacture and performance of the console through extensive testing of potential sources of any problems. Xbox 360 is pleased to maintain the title of 'most played console' and the vast majority of Xbox 360 customers have enjoyed a terrific gaming and entertainment experience since their first day, and continue to, day in and day out.

As always, when you are dealing with a spokesman, it's what's not said that's the story. In this case, Microsoft didn't even take a swipe at Game Informer's survey methodology, or the staggering 54.6 percent figure. in February 2008, they disputed the validity of a report saying the console had a 16 percent failure rate.

Then again, Microsoft probably knows that to continue the who-shot-john over its original motherboard and Falcon designs is to propagate the console's rep as a failboat. Plus challenging someone else's numbers either dredges up ones reported in the past, or creates demands for you to produce your own. Probably best to give it some "superior console" boilerplate and invite the issue to go away.

Microsoft still didn't say anything about the suck-egg customer service numbers - that only 38 percent found theirs helpful.

Microsoft Defends Infamous Red Ring of Death [TG Daily]

Final minus one, that is. Game Informer appears to be keeping one of the game's songs under wraps, listing 44 of the 45 tracks expected in the final version of The Beatles: Rock Band, a list of classic songs that ranges from "I Saw Her Standing There" from 1963's Please Please Me to the medley "Within You Without You/Tomorrow Never Knows" from 2006's Love. Read on for the full list, then check back with us tomorrow for additional hands-on impressions of The Beatles: Rock Band.

(Oh and thanks to JR for the heads up!)

Singles
I Want To Hold Your Hand
I Feel Fine
Day Tripper
Paperback Writer
Revolution
Don't Let Me Down

Please Please Me (1963)
I Saw Her Standing There
Boys
Do You Want To Know A Secret
Twist and Shout

With the Beatles (1963)
I Wanna Be Your Man

A Hard Day's Night (1964)
A Hard Day's Night
Can't Buy Me Love

Beatles For Sale (1964)
Eight Days a Week

Help! (1965)
Ticket To Ride

Rubber Soul (1965)
Drive My Car
I'm Looking Through You
If I Needed Someone

Revolver (1966)
Taxman
Yellow Submarine
And Your Bird Can Sing

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (1967)
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band/With a Little Help From My Friends
Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds
Getting Better
Good Morning Good Morning

Magical Mystery Tour (1967)
I Am The Walrus
Hello Goodbye

The Beatles (White Album) (1968)
Dear Prudence
Back In the U.S.S.R.
While My Guitar Gently Weeps
Birthday
Helter Skelter

Yellow Submarine (1969)
Hey Bulldog

Abbey Road (1969)
Come Together
Something
Octopus's Garden
I Want You (She's So Heavy)
Here Comes the Sun

Let It Be (1970)
Dig a Pony
I Me Mine
I Got a Feeling
Get Back

Love (2006)
Within You Without You/ Tomorrow Never Knows

Rage won't be out until 2010, according to id's Tim Hollenshead, meaning this summertime preview of the game will still mean a substantial wait. Game Informer promises "tons of exclusive dirt on the post-apocalyptic title, including plenty of gameplay details and loads of screens," so I hope the magazine got my change of address all sorted out.

The shooter is likely to be the last title id Software releases with EA Partners, now that it's owned by ZeniMax Media.

August Cover Revealed [Game Informer]

If you're a Game Informer subscriber, you're more than likely already familiar with some of these shots, already having come to terms with Max's struggles with baldness and adult-onset beer gut. Mr. Payne clearly has the triceps to double-wield a pair of almost any weapon and a carefree wardrobe perfect for thrilling bullet time dives.

For a half-dozen shots of Max Payne 3 in action, action set far from Max's old stomping grounds in New York City, check out our gallery of Rockstar Vancouver's Xbox 360, PC and PlayStation shooter.

Max will have the ability to fire two pistols at once in Max Payne 3.
He's also be able to shoot people to death with shotguns.
Max will also be able to hold two sub-machine guns, but fire just one of them.
He'll also take momentary pauses from shooting hundreds of people to find cover. Then he'll shoot someone.
Max's adventures will take him to varied locations in which he shoots people, with all manner of lighting conditions available to the former police officer.
Payne will also take time to reflect on his shooting spree, looking left and right for new people to fire guns at.

According to early, still rumored details from the mag, Max Payne 3 will move the series to Sao Paulo, Brazil, featuring a paunchier, balder, more heavily bearded Payne. The game is said to take place more than a decade after Max Payne 2, but the middle-aged pot-bellied Payne hasn't lost his penchant for "bullet time" slow-motion action over the years. That mechanic is reportedly still intact.

Another rumored update is that Max Payne 3 will feature some sort of multiplayer component. We'll have to wait until the newest issue of Game Informer arrives at the office to learn more.

Max Payne 3 is slated for release sometime this Winter. Thanks to Patrick for the early details.

And that means highly coveted details on Modern Warfare 2 went from print to internet at lightning speeds. Game Informer subscribers and advanced recipients who already have the issue in hand have revealed information on the game, which is said to be set a few years after the events of Call of Duty 4. In Modern Warfare 2, players will tackle a Russian terrorist threat in icy locales—where snowmobiles in war makes sense.

But don't count on cooperative play during Modern Warfare 2's story mode. That multiplayer option looks to be limited to the game's "Special Forces" mode, which is described by Infinity Ward president Jason West as "in the spirit of [the] Mile High Club" mission from Call of Duty 4.

West also describes the gameplay in Modern Warfare 2 as "wide open and has a lot of variety." But expect a similarly linear story, one just a touch longer than that of its Infinity Ward-developed precursor, because West contends that "any good story is on rails."

For more details and some spectacular looking screen shots of the game in action, pick up the newest issue of Game Informer as soon as you see it.

Oh sure, technically we've already had a first look at the follow up to Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare, most recently thanks to a fifteen second teaser featuring actual gameplay. But we have a feeling that Game Informer's look at Modern Warfare 2 is details-packed—far more informative than the highly stylized teaser trailer from GDC.

The magazine also promises a look at another Activision-published title—the only other game appearing on the Activision-exclusive cover—with DJ Hero getting first look treatment.

Subscribers should hurry up and wait for the June issue to hit their mailboxes!

Game Informer June 2009 Cover [GI]

Issue 103 of Game Informer magazine should be hitting store shelves next week, featuring the world exclusive reveal of Assassin's Creed II, with Ezio dramatically posing on the front cover. Ezio is a young noble who lost his family to rival families and is out for revenge, or at least I am assuming he's out for revenge. He could be just fine with it, having wanted to be an assassin anyway.

You can find more details in our rundown of the information from the magazine article. Just be sure to replace any instances of "Altair" with "Ezio" and we're golden.

May Cover Story Revealed [Game Informer]

According to data released by BurrellesLuce, the mag has a monthly readership of 3,517,598. Which makes it the 12th most read magazine in the United States, ahead of more notable publications such as Time, TV Guide, Sports Illustrated, Cosmo, Newsweek, Playboy and Maxim.

If only other mags could be distributed so prominently across the US in the nation's largest games retailer!

[via Joystiq]

2K and Game Informer both responded, saying the rumors that BioShock 2 would be Big Daddy-free were untrue. The rest of the details? Also lies. Big Daddies will be making another appearance in the sequel.

How?

You play as a Big Daddy.

In fact, you're the first of the lot, a so-called "renegade" Big Daddy who's on the hunt for a Little Sister of his own, according to a tipster who has the new Game Informer magazine in hand. You'll take out rival Daddies with your huge hand-drill and plasmid powers, claiming their wee sidekicks as your own. Similar to the first BioShock, you can choose to either harvest your Little Sister prize for ADAM or you can adopt her as your own.

That Little Sister comes in handy. She'll harvest ADAM from corpses strewn about Rapture, acting as a warning sign for when the Big Sister—the lithe, lightning fast enemy who will hunt your character throughout the game—has you in her sights. Based on her description, it sounds like she'll one hell of a fight.

From what we've heard, players will have access to all the things that made the Big Daddy such a menace in BioShock, with the character upgrades and options available in the first game expanded to keep things interesting. More details can be found in the new issue of Game Informer, which will be appearing in subscriber hands any second now.

After Killzone 2 and Uncharted 2: Among Thieves, one of the biggest announced games to hit the PS3 will be Sony Computer Entertainment Santa Monica's follow up to the PlayStation 2 hit, God of War II. Game Informer promises "exclusive info, gorgeous art and eye-popping screenshots" to subscribers.

We'll be taking a look at the PS3's inevitable blockbuster next Tuesday, an experience we'll tell you all about later next week. Keep an eye out for our own God of War III preview, on or about 9 AM next Friday.

March Issue Revealed! [Game Informer]

Sounds crazy, doesn't it? Didn't Grand Theft Auto IV just ship? Well, if Game Informer's "Loose Talk" is correct, pegging the next full-fledged GTA for, say, November 2009, it would put it about 18 months after the ship date of GTA IV.

Since Vice City shipped almost exactly a year after Grand Theft Auto III, however, makes the prospect seem less ludicrous.

Rockstar Games still has two downloadable episodes to ship this year, including The Lost and The Damned, which hits in February and another that remains undated.

Could they do it? We're not updating our Amazon wish lists just yet, but we're also not ruling it out. Take-Two and Rockstar do like money, after all. But we're checking in with them soon to find out how feasible a fourth quarter release could be.

Rumor: Rockstar ready to release next GTA by end of 09 [PSU]

According to the magazine's teaser, Singularity "features mind-bending gameplay that not only has the player jumping through time, but using it as a weapon." You get to combat those dirty Russkies, which is always a treat, so there's that.

The game was announced at E3 2008 via a teaser trailer, but we imagine Game Informer's coverage goes much further than the minute long video.

Even if you don't subscribe to the mag, Game Informer online will apparently have some Singularity flavored treats (ie. screen shots, videos, etc) for you later this week. Here's to hoping it's good — because I'm guessing as a "sci-fi shooter" it's going to need to do something spectacular to set itself from the pack.

Game Informer February Cover Revealed! [GI]

GameInformer's web tease on the PlayStation 3 title notes that the sequel "revolves around the 13th century explorer Marco Polo and his voyages." Uncharted 2 separates itself gameplay-wise with a new "free climbing mechanic and stealth gameplay." Ewww... stealth gameplay? The new stubble rendering I like, but I'm already feeling apprehensive about the S-word and the possibility of lots of ice levels.

The mag also promises a first look at Guitar Hero: Metallica which is almost guaranteed not to have any stealth segments, thank God.

January Issue Revealed [Game Informer - thanks, Max]

Considering what we've seen so far, which consists of little more than a teaser trailer, box art and a quick info dump from the boys at Bungie, we're excited to see what the game looks like. Our most educated guess is that it looks like Halo 3 with some Earth bits scattered around, but you never know.

Game Informer December 2008 Cover Revealed! [GI]

The October ish of Game Informer should be deployed by shuttle to newsstands any minute now, if you're interested in boldly going wherever $14.99 a month will take you. Perhaps more interesting is the "What If? starring Assassins’ Creed’s Patrice Desilets" feature, because we assume it highlights alternate facial hair choices for the Ubisoft developer.

October Issue Revealed [GI - thanks, Ian!]

The First Shot of the Drum Kit that will be used in GH 4 [Destructoid Blogs via Ars Technica - Thanks Matt!]

Guitar Hero IV will feature a "create a song" mode, allegedly, which appears to let gamers lay down guitar, bass and drum tracks—but no vocals—then upload their creations for others to enjoy. That song sharing mode is said to extend beyond the PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360 versions, with Wii and PlayStation 2 versions getting their own song sharing.

Additional details from the NeoGAF post indicate that players will be able to create custom virtual musicians, virtual guitars and virtual drums. As for the licensed stock tracks, tunes from Van Halen, The Eagles, Linkin Park and Sublime are said to appear.

More early details on Guitar Hero IV at the original post. Expect to see official word in no time at all.

Game Informer June 2008 Issue [NeoGAF]