For a game set in Hell that seems designed to court controversy, the inclusion of "unblessed infants" as something to slay sounds a lot more reasonable when described in such a sterile fashion. "These 'unbaptized' demons resemble babies only in size," says the ESRB's warning about potentially offensive content, "as they tend to hack, slash, scream, and impale/get impaled as often as taller demons."

See? Nothing to be concerned about, especially when factoring in the rest of the violent fare and... tongue-evisceration? Yep. Tongue-evisceration.

"Blood often splatters out of monsters' bodies when attacked; weakened monsters can be finished off with a set of commands leading to tongue-evisceration, but more often, some version of dismemberment," notes the rating. These things are so informative.

The "Mature" rating touches on the game's sexual content—like Cleopatra's bared, bruise-colored breasts—and the "shade minions," which have "tentacles protrud[ing] from their stomachs, their lower regions." By that, I assume they mean their feet.

But news to me at least was the shaft-swinging accuracy in Dante's Inferno. Apparently, one "bluish devil/demon in boss-battle mode" has it's business out and "there are equivalent physics applied to female/male body parts." How far we've come from physics-free phallus!

Dante's Inferno [ESRB]

"Ten years ago, a kid 10 years old could walk into any store in America and buy an ultra-violent, adult-rated game. That's no longer true," Walsh said of the 13-year-old NIMF's chief legacy. It was founded in the days of mainstream panic over titles like Duke Nukem and Doom, but industry types credit Walsh's leadership for having proportionate reactions to legitimate parental concerns, rather than exploiting them.

"Were it not for those collaborative efforts by all sides, it's questionable whether there would have been a non-legislative resolution," Hal Halpin, the president the Entertainment Consumers Association, told the AP. NIMF was very influential in the creation of the ESRB's rating system, which helped stave off government interest in regulating content.

Although Walsh expressed shock at watching 10-year-olds play games in which they dismembered their foes, he always maintained that he never endorsed censorship. And while NIMF was a critical actor in the "Hot Coffee" controversy that exposed sex scenes in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas - leading to its brief AO classification and resulting loss of sales - NIMF's report cards weren't dedicated to blaming games for everything. Parents fared worse than game makers and retailers in the group's 2008 report card, the last it will produce.

Unfortunately, this final quote, by author Steven L. Kent, will likely prove true: "I think the game industry will look back and pine for the days when their top opposing voice had as much self-restraint as Dr. Walsh had."

Video Game Watchdog Shuts Down, Victim of Economy [Associated Press on Yahoo! News]

Note: The ESRB blurb might contain what some could call spoilers. It does contain boobs. Side boobs.

Players assume the roles of heroes caught in a war between two opposing forces in this fantasy role playing game. Players travel between the planet Pulse and a moon named Cocoon to engage in missions for magical beings called the "fal'Cie. Missions involve battling enemy soldiers and creatures by using melee attacks (swords, knives, staffs, etc.), firearms, and magic spells (lightning strikes, fire blasts, etc.).
 
Combat is executed through a modified turn-based system in which players select various commands from a menu while freely moving one of three heroes through the battlefield. Players can also summon elemental creatures to battle an assortment of goblins, golems, zombies, wolves, frogs, bats, and robots.
 
The game's cinematic cutscenes contain the most intense depictions of violence: machine gunfire from space ships strafe human characters below; humans and robotic soldiers exchange gunfire-aboard vessels, on the ground; a slow-motion gunfight depicts the cracked lens of a robot shot in the head by two semi-automatics.
 
Cutscenes occasionally depict female characters dressed in revealing outfits: Holographic dancers-clad in bikini tops, skimpy leotards, and backless chaps-glide above the city during a festivity performance; flying-motorcycle models wear skin-tight tops that expose deep cleavage. And during one elaborate sequence, a female character transforms from a crystal statue back to her human form-sparkle effects, camera panning, and shimmering lights partially obscure the nude character, though side-portions of her breasts are visible (fleeting-one-to-two seconds). The game also contains the expletives "a*s," "damn," and "hell"; however, it is the violent content, the suggestive themes that account for the Teen rating.

Enjoy teenage gamers!

Final Fantasy XIII [ESRB via Siliconera]

The Entertainment Software Ratings Board offers an informative, potentially spoiler-filled account of what makes Mass Effect 2 deserving of a "Mature" rating, including the standard stuff, like enemies emitting "large splashes of blood when shot (particularly with "head shots")" and bad guys lying "stagnant in pools of blood." And you can "set robots on fire," something our future robotic overlords won't forget.

But what about the stuff that should get Mass Effect 2 a repeat appearance on Fox News? Oh, there's some of that too.

"The game contains themes of illicit drug use, addiction, and trafficking-often focal points to the branching storylines," says the ESRB's ratings description, making reference to a fictional drug.

And? "During the course of the game, players may enter a bar where alien pole dancing exists (choreography highlighted on big-screen monitors) or hear suggestive comments such as 'krogan sexual deviants enjoy salarian flexibility' and 'if this is just about sex, maybe you should just f**king say so.'" My, how potentially objectionable!

But here's where Mass Effect 2 gets hot.

The ESRB says: "Players can also choose to have 'romantic encounters' with the alien/human henchmen characters; this involves watching a guided cutscene in which two characters flirt, kiss, and/or embrace: clothed alien/human characters may prop a partner on top of a space console, clear away the clutter from a bed-slab, unzip a future-blouse, or just talk it out. Though an alien/human may gyrate her hips while on top (fleeting-one-to-two seconds), actual sex is never depicted-the camera cuts away to space furniture and ceilings."

Oh, space furniture. You're always getting in the way!

"Outpaces," is the word the FTC's report uses in describing the games industry's conduct among its peers, noting the 80 percent prevention rate in keeping M-rated content from minors, and keeping ads for M-rated games off the television prior to 10 pm.

Further: "The Commission commends the ESRB for its new online ratings summaries, which provide a more detailed explanation of the content that factored into a game's rating. This tool should enhance parental understanding of the ratings and the ratings process."

Entertainment Software Association President Michael Gallagher called the report "a strong acknowledgement and validation that industry-led self-regulation efforts are the best way to provide parents and retailers with the resources and support they need to keep our kids' entertainment experiences suitable."

The report evaluates the marketing and adevertising practices across the entertainment industries. It's the FTC's seventh such report since 2000.

Games Industry Best Regulated of All Entertainment Sectors [GamesIndustry.biz]

Originally released in fall 2007, the game uses the PlayStation Eye camera as well as Eye of Judgment cards. The PSP version has been rated Everyone +10 and contains references to alcohol and tobacco, fantasy violence, mild language and suggestive themes.

The ESRB rating summary reads as follows:

This is a strategy game in which players engage in turn-based card battles on a grid-like playing field. Players take turns selecting cards to summon fantastical creatures (e.g., dragons, elves, ninjas, dwarves, witches, giant lizards) on a game board. Creatures use magic spells, axe strikes, and sword slashes to attack enemy units on the board; card characters disappear in a plume of purple light when defeated (i.e., when their life points reach zero). Still-frame cutscenes add a dark tone to the relatively minimal depictions of violence; for example, "the tremors of earth soaked in the Children of Earth in blood." The text also contains the expletives "damn" and "hell" and a direct reference to alcohol (e.g., a "Drunken Demolition" card reads, "I wish I drowned to death in a sea of liquor"); one character is depicted with a lit cigar in his hand and mouth. Some cards depict female monsters-grey demon-like figures-in skin tight outfits that expose large amounts of cleavage.

Large amounts of cleavage? They should call it "The Eyeful of Judgment".

Eye of Judgment: Legends [ESRB Thanks, Christopher!]

The ESRB's entire ratings database is searchable, with full certificates available for titles back to July 1, 2008. Said the ESRB president Patricia Vance: "This new rating search app puts all this information at parents' fingertips when they need it most, right at the store. It's a powerful tool that will help assure parents that the games they give as gifts are not only fun but also appropriate for their children."

Not sure how frequently it updates; for the core, I guess it's another way to spy on what's been approved, and spoilers in games we know are in the pipeline. You can grab it here (link will open iTunes.)

The app launched with the following PSA. I would have loved it if she read off the ratings summary for BioShock 2 instead.

ESRB Launches iPhone Ratings App [Game Politics]

The closure is apparently tied to the end of funding from a primary NIMF source, Fairview Health Services, which had committed $750,000 annually to the Institute. WCCO-TV of Minneapolis reported that Fairview Health Services knew back in the summer that, in light of the current economy, "We can't continue," supporting NIMF.

NIMF was known for its annual Video Game Report Card, released around this time of year. The 2008 report gave an A grade to the ESRB, for its new game rating summaries; a B+ to retailers, for following rating and sales policies, and an "incomplete" to parents for not availing themselves of parental controls or closely following what their kids play.

While NIMF occasionally blasted the odd violent video game here or there, at least it wasn't part of the tinhorn orchestra that obligated the ESRB and retailers to do all the parenting by themselves. Game Politics notes that the Entertainment Software Association gave NIMF a $50,000 grant last year.

In a statement, NIMF said it hopes to continue its programs and research through other non-profit organizations.

NIMF to Close at Year End [Game Politics]

Speaking at the Montreal International Game Summit, Rémi Racine of A2M said:

As a developer who has worked with a lot of different publishers, we're aware of many that have tried to cheat the rating. They say to the ERSB that it's a Teen rating [13+] rather than an Mature [17+] to try and sell more; you can do this just by sending them a video that doesn't show the most violent stuff and then you'll get the rating that you want rather than the rating you should get.

Edge Online, which quoted Racine at the Summit, then published this reply from the ESRB's Eliot Mizrachi:

ESRB takes full disclosure of content during the rating process extremely seriously, and companies that submit their games to ESRB know this very well. We regularly check games post-release to verify that submissions were complete, and it's very likely that if a game contains undisclosed content that would have affected the rating assigned, we'll find out about it. In such cases ESRB can actually impose fines up to $1 million as well as require corrective actions like re-labeling or even recalling product, both of which can obviously be very costly. There's no incentive whatsoever for publishers to withhold content from ESRB in an effort to receive a lower rating, and those that would do so risk significant penalties.

I can't think of any titles which exemplify Racine's accusation; of course, my radar is largely fixated on upcoming AAA releases, and games of such a high profile are almost definitely M-rated or not, in the public's mind, before the ESRB gets hold of them. When was the last M-versus-T controversy anyway? Does it even matter? That said, there might be a few marginal titles out there. But which ones?

MIGS: Publishers "Cheat" Age Ratings [Edge Online]

There are some minor spoilers in the writeup, I suppose, so I'll let you venture over there if you're interested in what the awesome displays of violence entail, as they most directly pertain to capabilities or plot points in the story.

"The violence and the profanity account for the Mature rating," saith the ESRB, so let's look at the other half of that equation.

The game includes frequent use of strong profanity (e.g., "f**k," "motherf**ker," and "c*nt") and some lesser four-letter words (e.g., "sh*t" and "tw*t"); in one instance, an enemy attacks [Subject] Delta [that's you] while screaming, "F**king sodomites everywhere!"

Sodomites? F—- yeah! Oh there's also some stuff about hookin' and red-light districts. Frankly, in a laissez-faire capitalist society I'd be astonished if those weren't encountered, so maybe this should be rated O for Objectivism.

BioShock 2 [ESRB via Hot Blooded Gaming]

The Entertainment Software Ratings Board has issued the Assassin's Creed sequel a "Mature" rating, pointing out the potentially offensive "blood, intense violence, sexual content, and strong language" featured in the game.

The ESRB goes into great detail—with potential spoilers!—about the "sexual content" players may experience in Assassin's Creed II, including an interactive mini-game in which "players are able to press buttons to kiss a woman and remove her dress; with the woman's back facing the camera, the two characters lower to bed and blow out a candle." Oh my!

Oh and it gets so much more unsavory, at least from a dialogue standpoint, as references to S&M, page-boy diddling, rape and other deviant acts not fit for print in this publication are made throughout the game. Plus, there's naughty language in both English and Italian!

Will someone please think of the children? Preferably not while reading this snippet of the ESRB's description, pasted below, but afterward.

The game contains strong sexual overtones. During one "seduction mini-game," players are able to press buttons to kiss a woman and remove her dress; with the woman's back facing the camera, the two characters lower to bed and blow out a candle. Some scenes take place inside brothels, though no nudity or sexual acts are depicted. The dialogue contains the following sexual references: "So the whip or the paddle today?" and "Does your wife know about your page-boy fantasies, Captain?"

Character backstories, narrated through still-frame vignettes, explain how villains and historical figures achieved their notoriety; some biographies include references to adultery, sodomy, prostitution, and rape (e.g., "Caterina was captured and sent to Rodrigo Borgia . . . who kept her imprisoned for a year and is rumored to have raped her alongside his son.").

One cutscene depicts a man and a woman wearing translucent, flesh-toned bodysuits as they flee from danger. The digitized lighting effects, the glow from their futuristic suits, obscure most of the details, though outlines of breasts and buttocks are partially discernable (i.e., not definitively nudity).

Consumers may also wish to know that the game contains strong profanity, both in English and Italian (e.g., "f**k," "sh*t," c*zzo," and "m*rda"); the most explicit instance occurs when a man frantically describes a "vision"-"I'm at the opera . . . the soprano is so beautiful . . . I'm in bed with her, she cries as I f**k her."

Ack! My eyes!!

Assassin's Creed II [ESRB]

Manhunt 2, as an M-rated game on the PSP, PS2 and Wii, was very poorly received when it went out in 2007. While Rockstar hasn't specified what's going out in the super-duper adult version, it's my hunch that "adult" here doesn't mean what it means on pay-per-view. But there will be plenty of bodies.

AO-Rated Version of Manhunt 2 PC Coming Next Week via Download [Big Download via Joystiq]

ESRB spokesman Eliot Mizrachi contacted Kotaku to remind that the ratings authority has a different rate schedule for smaller games. "The ESRB has a reduced fee of $800 for games that have development costs under $250,000," Mizrachi said, "which would likely apply to virtually all PSP Minis."

But the ESRB may have a new, non-sterile policy for game rating summaries. That, or Left 4 Dead 2 writer Chet Faliszek is responsible for said summary. Oh, it starts off normal enough, noting that "the 'Boomer'-Infected explode in a shower of blood and bile when shot, which clouds players' view of the impending zombie swarm." Then it switches things up. With italics.

Here's the second half of the description, with emphasis retained.

Bladed melee weapons and direct hits from rifles, shotguns, etc., cause decapitation or dismemberment; intense depictions include: piles of the Infected in a pool of blood along the roadside; intestines spilling out of abdominal wounds; zombie jibs shooting in all directions; charred innards; and skeletal bits and unclaimed torsos. While the litany of somewhat "gruesome" depictions attests to the Mature rating, the over-the-top onslaught is, in some ways, mitigated by the exaggerated menacing evil (camp?) of the drone-like zombie horde; the genre homage (horror, zombies, . . . cricket paddle) is palpable. Consumers might also wish to know that the game includes profanity, such as "sh*t," "as*hole," and "b*tch"; however, it is the intense violence, the blood and gore that are the primary factors for the Mature rating.

Interestingly, it almost reads like a justification of Left 4 Dead 2's violent display of zombie thrashing.

Now, for the Kamen Rider Dragon Knight official description, unaltered and italicized per the ESRB.

"It'll end fast," declares a "Kamen Rider" moments before holding his defeated opponent in the air and showering him with explosions. Players control these robotic humanoid fighters in one-on-one or one-on-multiple combat with alien robotic creatures from another planet, or in this case, the Kamen Rider Dragon Knight TV series. Players constantly punch, kick, and use weapons (swords, axes, spears, spiked gloves) to deplete their opponents' health meter. Explosions, slashes, and hit effects can be seen and heard throughout battle. "Final Vents" (i.e., finishing attacks) can be used to defeat opponents, and range from melee attacks (e.g., jump kicks and pile drivers) to elaborate projectile attacks; for example, a motorcycle can be summoned to shoot fireballs and run over the opponent amid . . . more explosions.

The ellipsis may have been the best thing to ever happen to ESRB copy writers. Everyone loves a good... dramatic pause.

Quoting the Progress and Freedom Foundation, the report, published Aug. 31, says ESRB ratings are "in many ways the most sophisticated, descriptive, and effective ratings system devised by any major media sector in America." The parental control functions of the three current-gen consoles, plus Windows PCs, are also highlighted. The report mentions that game ratings are highly recognized and useful to parents (58 percent find them helpful, according to a third-party survey), and the percentage of kids buying M-rated games dropped dramatically from 2006 to 2008, according to the FTC.

Significantly, the report also says that the FCC considers "that video game players and video games are not the focus of the Child Safe Viewing Act," the piece of legislation that started this universal-rating discussion. "Video game players are not included among the devices specifically identified in Section 2(b)(2) of the Act, and video games are not mentioned in the Senate Report and were not discussed in the Senate hearing on the Act."

But the FCC inquiry did include video games when it sought comment on universal regulation, in light of their popularity with kids and concerns about their content. The majority of comments, the FCC noted, "take the position that video games should not be reviewed in this proceeding."

Final score: The ESRB gets a thumbs-up to Congress, and the legislation in question does not even concern video game consoles in the first place. If you like, you may download a pdf of the entire report and read it yourself.

FCC Cites Success of VIdeo Game Rating System [CNET]

No, not from the two Bad Dudes seen above or President Ronnie, but from Magical Drop III, one of the titles included in the arcade game collection. That puzzle game is singled out for its suggestive jiggling. Other titles outed by the ESRB include Bad Dudes vs. Dragon Ninja (natch), Burger Time, Caveman Ninja, Street Slam, and Secret Agent. Not a bad list so far.

If I were putting together a dream Data East collection, it would include—at the very least—oft-forgotten arcade gems like Heavy Barrel, Midnight Resistance, Two Crude, Tumblepop, Hippodrome and Robocop. Though, I don't expect that last entry would be legally feasible.

Should Majesco find some way to include Tattoo Assassins on the disc, then I'd appreciate someone waking me up from this crazy dream.

Data East Arcade Classics [ESRB]

In addition to pumping out re-ratings for titles like Tomb Raider and Bloody Roar, PSone Classics already released, there are also new appearances from PlayStation era highlights like Um Jammer Lammy and Oddworld: Abe's Exodus. Good news, especially for the nostalgic PSPgo owner.

Here's the latest list of new PSone Classics candidates. Watch for them on a PlayStation Store update near you.

• Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain
• Cool Boarders 3
• International Track & Field
• Oddworld: Abe's Exodus
• Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee
• Pandemonium!
• Syphon Filter 2
• Um Jammer Lammy

The ESRB's full listing is honest and straightforward, but I can't help but be taken back to the days of the PMRC and its incredulous, chapter-and-verse descriptions of all the hideous things bands like Megadeth and Slayer put into their lyrics, which we already knew about like back in the sixth grade, duh.

Read it for yourself. It is an unusually meaty entry. For some it's a warning. For others, one of the greatest testimonials the game could hope to have.

Brütal Legend

Platform: Xbox 360, PlayStation 3

Rating: Mature

Content descriptors: Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Partial Nudity, Strong Language, Suggestive Themes

Rating summary: This is an action adventure/role-playing game that tells the story of Eddie Riggs, a roadie who is transported to a mythical world of heavy metal rock. Eddie is armed with a guitar and a double-headed axe, which players can use to slash and dismember enemies. Players can also perform "face-melting solos" (literally melting enemies' faces), meet humanoid creatures dressed like dominatrixes and brandishing whips, and liberate an army of rockers from a life of oppression. Although the storyline is often irreverent and whimsical, the depictions of violence are somewhat intense: Undead humanoids are dismembered with an axe (sometimes in slow-motion); a "Steel-Quilled Blade" causes human enemies to explode into gibs that rain down; machine guns, missile launchers, and sub woofers can be used to kill druids and other fantastical creatures. Eddie can also run over dozens of enemies with his hot rod, resulting in blood effects and more heads and limbs getting chopped off. During the course of the game, characters sometimes engage in suggestive dialogue intended for comedic effect (e.g., "Maybe with all your feedback, you guys could just blow me over the gorge" and "Playtime's over. Now let's get back to the orgy"). Players will also encounter "Skull Rakers" clad in bondage gear and amazon-like warriors dressed in leather outfits that partially reveal buttocks and breasts. Strong profanity (e.g., "f*ck," "sh*t," and "d*ck") can be heard in the dialogue.

Brütal Legend ESRB Description is Long, Totally Epic [Destructoid]

Both Thexder NEO and Raystorm HD appear to be remakes of the 8-bit and 32-bit originals. The former is listed as a Taito title, the latter from Square Enix, which owns the former. Hey, this is just how Square Enix prefers to do things, OK?

The ESRB describes Raystorm HD as: "Players control a futuristic aircraft that destroys enemies and targets in this vertical-scrolling shooter game. Presented from a third-person perspective, the game allows players to fire lasers and missiles at asteroids, ships, planes, tanks, and buildings on the ground. Players face a steady swarm of enemies and bosses that react to damage by exploding in fiery bursts and plumes of gray smoke."

Its description of Thexder NEO is: This is a side-scrolling action game in which players control a transforming robot through a series of maze-like levels. Players must destroy enemy robots along the way by shooting them with laser beams. Most enemies react to damage by disappearing in a colorful burst; boss battles depict more protracted combat with louder and more realistic explosions."

The above screen shot of the Raystorm remake, listed as an Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 title, comes from a post on NeoGAF from earlier this month. I don't know how much more confirmation you'll need that these two titles exist.

Dino Crisis, Resident Evil 2, and Resident Evil 3: Nemesis have of course been in the ESRB.org database for a good long time, but they've each sprouted an additional system under their listings. The PlayStation 3 now joins the previously listed platforms, which one would assume indicates a pending release as PSone Classics. Capcom has already mentioned the games as being scheduled for the PSone Classics treatment, so perhaps the updated listing means they'll be hitting soon.

I for one hope they are getting the PSone Classics treatment soon, as I never did finish the original Dino Crisis and would like to give it another go before admitting I am scared of dinosaurs.

Update: Yes, we already mentioned this. Yes, I feel like a tool for forgetting. Yes, I updated the post to reflect the correct info.

Latest ESRB Ratings [NeoGAF via TheSixthAxis]