Dumb

Kids' Choice Awards Choose Poorly

On Sunday, March 29th, rock and roll hero and sometimes actor Jack Black returns to the Nickelodeon stage to host the 21st Annual Kids' Choice Awards, where the stupid children decide who wins the awards! Now I know there are some pretty smart children out there, but they are all busy playing games like Portal or BioShock (with their stupid parents proudly ignoring them in the other room), thus the nominees for the 2008 Favorite Video Game Award:

Dance Dance Revolution
Guitar Hero
High School Musical: Sing It!
Madden NFL '08

There's really not much I can say here. I mean, Guitar Hero is nice and all, but they just list Guitar Hero...not II or III. Same with Dance Dance Revolution. There are 20 bajillion versions of DDR out there. Pick one! Madden 08 just goes to show that they were running out of kid-friendly titles to nominate, and if High School Musical: Sing It! wins? I am driving over to my nephew's house and smacking him upside the head just for associating with people his own age.

Kids' Choice Award's Official Nominee Announcement [Nickelodeon]

10:20 AM on Fri Feb 8 2008
By Mike Fahey
6,203 views, 162 comments

Latest by dowingba: There were plenty of awesome kids' games last year, and none of them are on that list. Guitar Hero is rated Teen, by the way. more »

crime and punishment

El Paso Police Nab Fugitives With 360s

Rule of thumb here people. If you are on the run from the law for a crime you did or did not commit, you don't win video game consoles. Even if you do, you don't. A lot of fugitives from justice learned this lesson the hard way in early November, when police in El Paso Texas staged a roundup using an Xbox 360 and a television as bait. The fugitives in question were informed that they had won a fabulous video game prize, and when they arrived to pick it up they were arrested on the spot. The operation led to 115 arrests, 129 cleared warrants, and the collection of $25,686 in unpaid traffic fines. Not one Xbox 360 was given away. Once again, if you are on the lam, you win nothing. Don't try to collect a prize, show up for the game show you suddenly get invited to, or follow that piece of candy being mysteriously drug along the ground by a string towards a waiting paddy wagon. It can only end in tears.

115 fugitives, lured by gifts, arrested in El Paso sting [El Paso Times via GameRush Entertainment]

9:40 AM on Fri Nov 30 2007
By Mike Fahey
1,846 views, 68 comments

Latest by aesthetis: Is Fahey feeling alright today? Drug along the ground? Something in his previous post was messed up too. I think we need to get a sobriety test, for his own good. You know I'm right. The first step is admitting more »

dumb

Guide Gives Gamer Girls Handholding

Book time! British publisher Black Dog Media is releasing The Girl's Guide to Gaming, which is apparently a girl's guide to gaming. And because the book is a girl's guide, it is pink! Didn't you know that girls like pink? They do! And the DS Lite on the cover? So pink. Black Dog's James Gale explains:

Nintendo didn't want to fight over the same demographic as Sony, so they created a complete new one, a market in which it wasn't only boys that played games... It's hats off to Nintendo. Without their bravery to push the market away from the old boys' club, I doubt we would now be part of a fresh marketplace, where female gamers have been given a long overdue voice.

Yeah, because before the DS, girls just sat around, stared at the wall and ate rocks, too. No way they could play something as complex as the PS2! Good thing there's this guide — otherwise, we're sure they'd be totally at a loss. Hey, we haven't read this book and don't want judge this literary work by its cover. But damn, it's sure as shit hard not to.
Girl's Guide to Gaming [Digital Spy, Thanks shu!]

6:40 AM on Thu Nov 1 2007
By Brian Ashcraft
2,376 views, 74 comments

Latest by lephi: This doesn't look like a book for gaming girls; it looks like a book for their parents. Well meant gift that attempts to connect with the child and her/his interests, yet sits unread on the kid's bookshelf. I think the more »

dumb people

Halo 3 Saved Films Almost Axed

If Bungie added one great new feature to Halo 3 that allowed fans to interact with the franchise in a fresh way, it was the Saved Films feature. Especially with what we've already seen of the incredible screenshots, the feature has been a hit—and will unquestionably become the most successful in-game video editor of all time (based upon my three seconds of infallible logic). But the feature was almost cut. More »

10:40 AM on Tue Oct 23 2007
By Mark Wilson
11,454 views, 77 comments

hot hot hot

Yes, Stoves Do Melt Xbox 360s

The Xbox 360 is a fragile piece of hardware. Keep it running for long periods without proper ventilation, and it just might Red Ring of Death on you. Leave it running on a hot stove, and it will, well, it'll melt. Hell, pretty much leaving anything on a hot stove will cause gooey meltdown. Here's what apparently happened: Ty and his buddies were setting up for a Halo 3 LAN match and ran out of space to set up consoles. So, Ty and his buddies decided that, say, instead of putting it on the floor, they should put the Xbox 360 on the stove. And whoops, someone forgot to turn off the stove. You know, like people do. Look closely at the picture to see two things: 1). A third party cooling device 2). The handiwork of nitwits.
Don't Leave 360 on the Stove [Engadget]

7:00 AM on Mon Oct 8 2007
By Brian Ashcraft
8,714 views, 88 comments

Latest by Gigith: I doubt this is real.If their dumb enough to do this how are they smart (Normal enough) to take a picture of it? Or turn on their PC. Or sit down. more »

just add water

Boy Fries Himself with Hot Hot Xbox 360

Dumb, dumb, dumb. Apparently, a 14 year-old North Carolina boy was almost killed trying to keep his Xbox 360 from overheating. According to local news, the boy's mother found her son unconscious after he attempted to submerge the console in a pan of water. "When I left to go next door he was playing a game but when I got back he was laying on his back on the floor and unconscious," she said. The console, wrapped in plastic and tape, was still plugged in. The kid has read online that he could keep his 360 from over heating by cooling its power supply. By the time the ambulance showed up, the boy had regained consciousness. Thankfully, when the ambulance arrived, the boy had regained his senses. He was rushed to a nearby hospital and suffered small burns on his hand and foot. Kids remember: No matter what the internet says, electricity and water are NOT friends. They're not even on speaking terms.
Boy Nearly Killed [Fun Tech Talk Game|Life]

9:00 PM on Tue Aug 21 2007
By Brian Ashcraft
51,296 views, 166 comments

Latest by KM91: I wonder who wrote that online... Remember kids, if you find something on the internet, use your common sense. more »

dumb

Moron Pisses On PS2, Gets Electrocuted

In honor of getting a PS3, some really smart students at the University of Wyoming (go Cowboy Joe & Pistol Pete!) decided to destroy their PS2. I mean, why not? The PS3 is sooooo much better than the PS2. One of the students thought it would be so hilarious to piss on the console, which happened to still be plugged in the wall. He was electrocuted and fell to the floor unconscious. After coming to about ten seconds later, the student was rushed to the hospital where a doctor's prognosis confirmed he was in fact an idiot. Brian Ashcraft More »

12:00 AM on Wed May 16 2007
By Brian Ashcraft
8,609 views, 97 comments

Latest by mcderek3000: NOW THAT'S FORCE FEEDBACK! wait, I've got another one ... IS THAT HOW WIRELESS WORKS? more »

wii

Wii Don't Need No TV

Want to know the best thing about the Nintendo Wii? You can play it with the TV off! That is, at least according to Toys "R" Us Wii catalog. This is very good news for me, personally, as I do not currently own a television. More »

4:40 PM on Thu Nov 9 2006
By Michael McWhertor
397 views, 30 comments

jack thompson

Jack Bitches About Bully's "Gay Sex"

When asked how babies are made, a typical childhood response is kissing. Professional lawyer and idiot Jack Thompson still thinks this. Why? Because he is a child. Rockstar's Bully features two male characters smooching, which is enough for Thompson to go into bonkers mode. In a typically off-mark email to the company's CEO Paul Eiberler, Thompson cites the game's "gay sex" as "harmful to minors." Because, Jack wouldn't want a rash of boys unknowingly impregnating other boys by lip-locking. His characteristically small and bitter logic after the jump. Brian Ashcraft More »

8:22 AM on Mon Oct 30 2006
By Brian Ashcraft
6,135 views, 69 comments

Latest by jjmusicman29: Since when was homosexuality illegal in the United States? Since when was there any homo"sexual" action in Bully anyways? Just kissing. Which, I'm sorry Jack, a lot of 10-17 year old homos do, even without the game "Bully". Jack is violating the more »

rockstar

Video of Mindless Drones Protesting Rockstar's Bully

This clip is BANANAS. B-A-N-A-N-A-S! Peaceholic's flock of bleating sheep do not make a good case for Take Two or Rockstar to worry about intelligent debate on the issue of Bully's level of violence and impact on younger players. Warning: This video contains words like "TURR'RISTS" and "MURICA" and arguments that might just make your eyes roll clean out of their sockets. Michael McWhertor

9:11 AM on Sat Aug 26 2006
By Michael McWhertor
812 views, 48 comments

australia

Video Games Rot Yer Brain Says Aussie Paper

Video games rot your brain. So says The Sydney Morning Herald in a gloom and doom piece on the video game industry. To support this tired argument, the paper has university professors saying "The video game industry is taking the same approach that the tobacco industry took for many years." The Sydney Morning Herald then quotes Jack Thompson. More »

12:22 PM on Mon May 15 2006
By Brian Ashcraft
487 views, 6 comments

Kotaku

Green Lantern, Joker Join MK Vs. DC Universe Line Up

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