While my character rose to great (hypothetical) heights of power during the closed beta, the open beta for CD Projekt Red and one2tribe's The Witcher: Duel Mail now begins in earnest, with players all over the globe invited to show them just how slow their game can run with all of you trying to beat up my pretty little level 1 sorceress at once. Her name is Kotaku, and she enjoys long walks on the beach, candlelit dinners, ponies, and kicking your sorry ass. Teehee!

The Witcher: Duel Mail [Official Site]

Bandai Namco's Duel Love takes players into the underbelly of prep school fighting. That doesn't mean the game is only about fighting. At its core, Duel Love is a Japanese "renai game" ("romantic game") where the goal is to get the game's exceedingly male metrosexuals to fall head over heels in love with you. This is standard dating sim stuff, but Bandai Namco tries to spruce up the formula with touch pen touching.

Duel Love, like most renai games, is more reading and less playing. (Thus, that doesn't exactly make it import-friendly!) Onward the "Loved" and the "Hated"!

Listen To Boy Massage Moaning

Yep. I did it. Yesterday I went out and bought man-sweat scrubbing game — so embarrassing! (My wife even refused to buy it for me.) People may not know this, but I'm painfully shy. So doing things like buying suggestive games makes me red. Of course, I have no problem posting some seriouslyfuckedupshit. That's what we call "irony." Anyway, I'll be playing the game over the weekend, while staying at the in-laws so I can review it sometime next week. That's what we call "awkward."

Duel Love On Sale [Akiba OS]

For those unable to attend the Tokyo Game Show and get quality hands on with Namco Bandai's Duel Love, here's a handy flow chart that helps explain the different moods induced by sweat scrubbing — all of which look like variations of lethargy. Hit the jump for a screenie of the steamy shower room scene and a helpful explanation of game play.

Remember Duel Love? That female-geared DS game that has players whip the sweat off fetching young males. It's a Japanese dating game that centers around a school's secret fight club. Players "help" the fighters by wiping off sweat, treating injuries or giving "massages." The game's out this month, and that's the game's producer decked out in Duel Love gear. Here's what she says about her boy sweat scrubbing game:

Spring's in bloom! The season of love has arrived. Now, people want to fall in love, some people are tired of love, other want to forget it. Wouldn't you like to start fresh with Duel Love's Passion Mode? If lovey-dovey couples can play together, it'll be no accident that they get aroused!

When Game Theorists Duel