I had some beers last night for St. Patricks Day (hey, it starts at midnight). Followed by a few Beamish when I played P4 for a few hours. I woke up 30 min ago, and turn on Kotaku. I see this article and the sentence:
"Is Mayor Tortimer actually a man in California that asks for naked images from Missouri children?"
I feared that this was some hallucination from not having coffee yet. So I left and came back. The offending sentence hadn't vanished. I started to worry that maybe I needed to stop drinking. Or maybe my life had become a Thomas Pynchon novel.
I'm really glad all of you are seeing this, too, though. This is the most harebrained thing that I've ever read in this video game hysteria context. What you have to understand is that as terrible as St. Louis and Kansas City are (ok, I'm exaggerating a bit), mid-Missouri is full of the people who aren't qualified for either of those two cities (Columbia is given a pass here). Terrible lot.
I'm thinking of googling 'how to write a cease and desist letter' and emailing a threatening sounding one to them, as acting attorney for adult AC players. Hey, if they believed that Tortimer nonsense, they'll believe this.
Pong is teaching us to beat people with paddles! Dr. Mario is teaching us how to stash drugs in small spaces! Imagine: Babiez is causing us to imagine MAKING babies! And then actually doing it! Before marriage!
"I cannot come up with any legitimate reason that an adult would be playing that particular game"
REALLY?! Gee, I dunno... maybe because it's FUN?! Pardon me, a 29 year old adult, for playing these kiddie games. What WAS I thinking?! Where is that Trivial Pursuit or Wii Solitaire that I SHOULD be playing?! I AM on foot in the grave, after all and can't have too much stimulation from those kiddie games.
I hate the human race, sometimes/mostly/all the time.
I absolutely loathe the logic they're demonstrating here. That's like saying I have no reason to read The Phantom Tollbooth because it's made for kids.
Piss off and leave me to my Harold and the Purple Crayon.
@SadAstronaut: i always saw tom nook as more of a pimp. "You still don't have enough bells to pay off that house I gave you? You better get back on the street and make those bells before I have to slap you!"
@walking_spanish: Tom Nook: "Now, you don't just get this house for free, oh no, you must pay off the debt by doing small tasks for me. Also, due to Megan's Law, I am obligated to inform you that...
... You know what, never mind. Your first task is to..."
It actually *hurts my face* to read this article. My brow furrows to inhuman depths otherwise impossible without this kind of idiotic stimuli. I own all 3 Animal Crossings, I'm 28. The youngest person I know who plays it is my brother at 19.
To characterize anyone not a child who plays this game as a sexual predator is completely ridiculous. It also goes against Nintendo's own MO as creating games for *everyone*. Nintendo WANTS old people and young people to play this game. One could get a concussion from the facepalm earned after reading this.
I guess we should stop playing AC because the TV told us not to. And if we are caught playing AC now, we are in suspect to arrest. Gee thanks media for saving us from the scary pedophiles. Now I can throw out my copy of AC!
Also: I see no reason why children would play M rated games. They must be adultaphiles. Send them to jail too!
03/17/09
"Is Mayor Tortimer actually a man in California that asks for naked images from Missouri children?"
I feared that this was some hallucination from not having coffee yet. So I left and came back. The offending sentence hadn't vanished. I started to worry that maybe I needed to stop drinking. Or maybe my life had become a Thomas Pynchon novel.
I'm really glad all of you are seeing this, too, though. This is the most harebrained thing that I've ever read in this video game hysteria context. What you have to understand is that as terrible as St. Louis and Kansas City are (ok, I'm exaggerating a bit), mid-Missouri is full of the people who aren't qualified for either of those two cities (Columbia is given a pass here). Terrible lot.
I'm thinking of googling 'how to write a cease and desist letter' and emailing a threatening sounding one to them, as acting attorney for adult AC players. Hey, if they believed that Tortimer nonsense, they'll believe this.
03/17/09
Sure, adults don´t play Animal Crossing, they also don´t play stuff like Pokemon! This guy should get a cup of STFU.
03/17/09
HEAD FOR THE HILLS!
03/17/09
REALLY?! Gee, I dunno... maybe because it's FUN?! Pardon me, a 29 year old adult, for playing these kiddie games. What WAS I thinking?! Where is that Trivial Pursuit or Wii Solitaire that I SHOULD be playing?! I AM on foot in the grave, after all and can't have too much stimulation from those kiddie games.
I hate the human race, sometimes/mostly/all the time.
>_<
03/17/09
Oh, okay Andy. Thanks for clearing that up, seeing as your obviously such an expert.
03/17/09
I guess it's true what they say: you don't turn from green, if you know what I mean.
03/17/09
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03/17/09
Piss off and leave me to my Harold and the Purple Crayon.
03/17/09
:P
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03/17/09
"Hi neighbor! Welcome to our fine town!
...Did I mention I'm a registered sex offender?"
03/17/09
... You know what, never mind. Your first task is to..."
03/17/09
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03/17/09
"People die when they are killed"
03/17/09
They do? *calls local news*
03/17/09
03/17/09
Ugh, my already low IQ just dropped several points after reading this.
03/17/09
"There is no reason an adult should have this game," says Andy Anderson, Mid-Missouri Internet Crimes Task Force.
You sure got told.
03/17/09
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It actually *hurts my face* to read this article. My brow furrows to inhuman depths otherwise impossible without this kind of idiotic stimuli. I own all 3 Animal Crossings, I'm 28. The youngest person I know who plays it is my brother at 19.
To characterize anyone not a child who plays this game as a sexual predator is completely ridiculous. It also goes against Nintendo's own MO as creating games for *everyone*. Nintendo WANTS old people and young people to play this game. One could get a concussion from the facepalm earned after reading this.
03/17/09
03/17/09
Also: I see no reason why children would play M rated games. They must be adultaphiles. Send them to jail too!
03/17/09
who you think brought out miley cyrus?
03/17/09
who you think brought out miley cyrus?
I always thought it was her dad who was exploiting her.
03/17/09
02/06/09