A follow up to battlefields big update, it now tells me that my version is incompatible with the current one so I can't play multiplayer #speakup(Edit comment)
Note: This is a personal rant post, you can skip it if you want to.
Living in a tropical country with high level of humidity means I have this dependency on using Air Conditioner system a little bit too much. I know it's not good for my skin in long term but either I sleep with AC on or I sleep nekkid!
I feel your pain Rook (the name of that cat). #speakup
First off -- THIS IS NOT A SEXIST POST. I'm relaying an event I went through less than 30 minutes ago on PSN. I was playing poker in Playstation Home and made the "mistake" of saying my girlfriend had ran from the house because the "CD" (Carbon Dioxide) alarm was going off. The most pretentious person I've ever met in my life -- online or off -- gave me so much shit, saying I must mean "CM" (Carbon Monoxide). She went on with a ton of "lololololol, this guy is a fucking RETARD and I hope he chokes to death and his girlfriend deserves to die, just to save her from him!" Even after I said that, yes, I meant Carbon MONOXIDE. Not DIOXIDE. Even after that, she kept going. On and on and on and on.
This woman, whose name I won't name, despite her saying she will do "all in her power," to "remove" me from PSN for "being stupid." And her saying she's removed "a bunch of stupid men" and that "removing stupid fucking men when you're an intelligent woman gamer is 'the easiest thing ever.'" She said she was "mega-intelligent." She said she was currently a nurse, who has saved the lives of "thousands." After that, she demanded I compare my college degrees with hers (I didn't, but my college degree is far more impressive).
She DID NOT FUCKING STOP ATTACKING ME FOR OVER AN HOUR, UNTIL I FINALLY LEFT THE GAME (and why should I have been forced out of this game?). Every time I had a bad hand, she typed, "LOL - RETARD MAN FAILS AGAIN!" It was ridiculous. I finally asked the other players to "quiz" us to show if she's smarter. This was AFTER I just gave in and said she was "way" smarter than me. After I said she was a "genius" and I was just "another dork with a penis." It happened way after I said I didn't care if she was smarter and admitted she probably was (although she wasn't, but these are the things we do).
After being attacked for over an hour and after her saying my girlfriend must have "snailtracks and shit-trails" in her "panties" because, "no one would date a freak like you if they could wipe their own assholes" I left the game. Prior to that, I asked if she'd like to play a quiz-show type game like "Buzz" to test our "intelligence." She said something like, "I can't believe how desperate males are to get laid -- even by females who despise them!" I said it had nothing to do with sex and she said that ANY man wanting to talk to or play with a woman wants to "stick his dick" up that woman's "pussy."
This is what I just dealt with. I had NO FUCKING INTEREST in this woman. I don't even know, for sure, if "she" WAS a woman. All I know is that more than just females can feel violated while gaming online. And Kotaku can buy this article from me and give two sides, because I don't feel like we've been shown both sides. All we know, thus far, is that women are raped 77,778 times each before the age of 30 and it's all the fault of the male gamer.
I have NEVER been violent toward a female. I have been nothing but respectful toward female gamers. I don't doubt female gamers have it worse than male gamers, but to pretend that NOTHING ever goes wrong with men gaming with women is BULLSHIT. And I hope this site, and ALL gaming sites, acknowledge that.
I sent Kirk a detailed message trying to get them to run at least one article that looked at gender from a different perspective, and they basically ignored it. Sorry to hear about your incident. Sounds infuriating. And you're like one of the most laid back commenters on Kotaku. #speakup(Edit comment)
Wow damn dude I'm sorry to hear what you had to go through. I'm normally a laid back kind of guy and nothing ever gets to me online. But that girl would have had me clawing at her throat if she were real. It's really sad that people, anyone, would say things like that to anyone else? Is it so hard to respect someone else? I'm not huge into any belief but I tend to like the idea of karma. Let's just say right now I'm really hoping she'll come to understand and reflect on what she did to you and undoubtedly what she's done to others as well.
Don't let her get to you too much though. For every bad person there's 2000 good people. #speakup
Oh, was she EVER real. I kept asking her why she was attacking my girlfriend, who she didn't know (she didn't know me, either). Her answers got worse and worse. First it was the "snail-tracks in panties" thing. That then turned into, "because anyone who would date you is a fucking cunt!" It was really stressful and, guess what? Online it doesn't matter if you have a penis or a vagina -- being attacked is being attacked and I am getting sick and tired of certain sites acting like only one sex can be attacked online. #speakup(Edit comment)
sorry I meant to say if I saw her in person. I believe you that she was real. I would've especially gone ballistic if she were insulting my girlfriend. I can take personal insults fine, but no one ever makes fun of her.
I agree about how sites for some reason never report on men being attacked only eve on women. Would help bring a fair balance to the situation if they did that I think. #speakup
That person definitely got to you. Sorry you had to put up with an asshole.
Next time, if someone is being -that- irrational and abrasive, just walk away. She was clearly trolling you in every possible way, and the only way to win a game like that is to not play. I know that sucks, as you shouldn't have to get up and leave, but for your sake, it's best to just walk away and find somewhere else to play.
As far as the suggestion that anyone has said that only women get harassed online, that's silly. I don't think anyone who has written an article on the disproportionately poorer treatment of women in gaming would honestly state that no men are ever harassed by women. The point is the disproportionality, not a black and white either/or. Of course men get harassed. They get harassed by other men plenty of the time. They certainly get harassed by women sometimes, too. That's because, regardless of gender, people are still just people. Regardless of what sex organs you have, you're still just as likely to be an asshole as anyone else.
Again, it sucks that you felt like that; though, your displeasure with this jerk has little to do with the larger issue of how women are often treated in the gaming environment. Men can have it rough, too, and that doesn't take away from the rough time that many women are having. In general, there's a problem of dickishness amongst many gamers(and just average human beings), and in gaming, that simply manifests with a lot of mistreatment of women that is disproportionate with the mistreatment of men. Neither should be mistreated; we should work to improve both. Though, when you look at what is the bigger, more common issue, it's that mistreatment of women. We can work on that and encourage a more level playing field or we can just work on discouraging idiocy and cruelty in general. Both are viable options.
Articles may focus on one option, but it doesn't mean they're denying people's ability to choose another way. They're just representing what they personally believe is the best way to tackle the mistreatment of others. Maybe that doesn't line up perfectly with our preferred method or feelings on the subject, but then, we can go about doing our own work to change things. They don't have to be one or the other. If we just argue over what the right focus is, we'll miss out on actually doing what we set out to do. As long as we're all working toward treating others better in our own ways, things can actually improve. Let's just focus on that, speak our peace, and live to improve ourselves and all of those around us as best that we can with the limited time we have. #speakup
Ouch, I can't imagine how I'd react with such an experience. Luckily I never made an even remotely comparable experience.
That she isn't the brightest light is beyond question, but I wonder how the rest reacted to her? I hope at least you filed a complain against her. #speakup
I'll point it out then. The charge port is about the same exact position where the PS3 one is and I think uses the same cable. The led light which indicates the controller position is also on the Wii U controller, but is on the bottom instead of the top. And the lights are also in blue. Same idea and concept though. The added power button is also somewhat the same as the PS button, even if it has more buttons in the middle than a PS3 controller. #speakup(Edit comment)
Also, of course, like the PS3, it has symmetrical analog sticks, and unlike the Xbox 360 controller, the D-pad isn't totally worthless. I personally am not a fan of the 360 controller myself, so I'm not really digging this, but eh. To each his own.
But ki_881 is right. It is a melding of both of the controllers...there's just no way to know if it works until people get their hands on it. Well, I guess we'll find out on Tuesday.
So I watched that broadcast of the Wii U talking about all its features, this isn't about the Wii U though.(But I must admit, I think Nintendo is on to something) No, not about the Wii U at all actually. Its about that video "demonstration" that was played in the middle, as I watched with what I could only describe as feeling of PURE FUCKING RAGE!!!
First off, its starts with this douche-bag screaming his head off about killing zombies. I have a big fucking problem with this already, because A) I have heard his voice and it irritates the shit out of me and B) I'm only 3 seconds in. Next is where the real problem comes in, I see him. Him, with that dry parted hair, that poor ass excuse for a 5 o'clock shadow, those dopy looking hipster glasses, and that unbutton flannel shirt. 5 seconds in and I already want to commit murder. I'm in too deep already, nothing can take my eyes away from the the thing that is building my fury to highest of levels with every second that passes.
The ham is upped to extreme levels of saltiness with the ever so popular spazzing out on the controller, where it looks like the person has lost all control of their bodies, and are on the verge of a epileptic seizure. There's the "trash talking", which is nothing more then what a 3 year old can pull out of its ass trying to do the same thing. He crack his knuckles, as do I because I'm about ready to punch my screen. I'M ONLY 10 FUCKING SECONDS IN!!!
At this point my blood starts to rush as my adrenalin is kicking in. Veins are popping out of my neck, hands are shaking, beads of sweat are forming on my forehead. Either I'm about to have a heart attack, or shooting rampage, I have no idea because all I'm thinking in my head is "DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE!" as the guy says the same thing......its like hes mocking me. Then as if to add insult to injury, he starts to lose and begins to whine about it. Great, as if his voice wasn't bad enough already, now its raised a few octaves higher to nails on chalkboard levels of annoyance. I begin to see red.
That's when the self awareness of the video kicks in. The guy proclaims if he doesn't beat the boss he's going to start talking to himself like a crazy person, to which he turns to an action figure of a Mexican wrestler with bat wings holding Conan the Barbarians sword to get reassurance. The video already knows its ridiculously stupid at this point, so why not just make even less sense, and bitch slap its viewers in the face. Keep in point, that the video hasn't even made it to the features of the Wii U yet, this is all just the set up.
Then the Wii U controller asks him about is mood. He says complete despair, I say 'so angry that I could kick kittens and punch babies.' So, he asks for help. Every word that is said, every gesture that is made, every action that is preformed by this guy is just fuels the rage even more. I want it to end, but I can't stop it. Even the posts that he reads make them sound more pathetic then what they actually are. He finds out that other people are having the same problem and states that he's not alone after all. No, you are alone, very alone.
Now, I'm already in pure fucking hell at this point, but the video doesn't think I have had enough. The video miraculously pulls in another annoying character out of thin air, although slightly less then what has already been on the screen. Oh, by the way, the douchschnozzle that I have been going on about does have a name, its....ugh, Todd. Anyway, this new character, who's name is Warren, is a stalker because apparently he has nothing better to do then to sip coffee, while picking up chicks and spy on his "friend" over the internet.
He sees Todd is in trouble and jumps on the opportunity to call him up, insult him, invite himself over to play Wii U, beat his games, and has no remorse about it either. Oddly enough, I am fine with this. I think Todd deserves this kind of shabby treatment all the time, then again that's probably why Todd is the way he is anyway. Just the trials of life beating Todd with a dick to the face every chance it gets and not giving a damn when a little bit of spooge gets in his eye. Todd just sits there and takes it because Todd is a little fucking nancy boy. FUCK YOU TODD!!!
Obviously Todd has no time for Warren and rejects all his shit. What the fuck Todd? Not only are you annoying but an asshole too, Todd. Your best friend is going to help you with those nasty zombies but you decide to take the advice of someone else and tell Warren to fuck off, Todd. You made Warren cry, Todd! Again, FUCK YOU TODD!
Here's where the video gets a little weird, it tries to take a stab at some comedy relief. It doesn't cut back to Todd immediately after he hangs up on Warren, but stays on Warren for a few more seconds as he watches a mildly attractive female sits at the table across from him. He tries to initiate conversation with her by stating that they are both drinking coffee and that coffee drinkers have a lot in common, she rejects his shit too. Damn, nobody likes Warren today. Whats troubling about this is that it has no place in a Wii U demonstration video, at all. Its another one of those self awareness moments that the video does and it wasn't funny either.
The rage did subside for a moment while all that was going on, but then it cuts back to Todd, and the rage returned as quickly as it did the first time. Todd takes this advice from OctoG123 about some shit for pockets of puss and goes on playing the game again. Todd must have not played the tutorial because he has no idea what OctoG is talking about and fails again. Note to self, never partner up with Todd if the zombie apocalypse happens. In fact, do Todd a favor and just shoot him. Todd being the hapless dumbass that he is still needs help, so he wants to talk to OctoG face to face.
Now for the first time in the whole video, there is a non annoying character talking to Todd, and he's too good for him. OctoG is a 80 year old man, he rides a rascal, insults Todd, and plays video games. All of this is introduced within the first few seconds of OctoG being on the screen. I especially like the parts where he insults Todd and he does it a lot. I am overwhelmed with joy. Good on OctoG, he must hate Todd as much as I do. OctoG instructs Todd to call him Grandpa, Todd being the little bitch that he is doesn't want to. Fuck, Ill call him Grandpa, because this man just oozes alpha male status compared to Todd. Grandpa fucks Todd's mom and tells him about it, probably even makes Todd watch it over the Wii U. That's just how awesome Grandpa is.
Anyway, Grandpa doesn't take any shit from Todd. He tells Todd what to do, being all snarky, and insulting. Making Todd call him his best friend in front of his action figure who is apparently Todd's real best friend. No wonder everyone insults Todd, he puts an action figure above real people. Todd is embarrassed and cuts Grandpa as quick as possible, good thing Grandpa got one final insult in before Todd could be a asshole again. So ends the best 30 seconds of the video, character wise anyway.
Now were just back to Todd and his stupid fucking action figure. Todd obeys Grandpa like he should, because Grandpa is fucking awesome and Todd knows it. So Todd goes back to spazzing out on the controller, and dry humps it for some reason too. At this point, I'm just at a loss for words and/or feelings. Then the unthinkable happens, Todd wins the game, or maybe its just wins that one part of the game, I don't know. What I do know though is that Todd is one unstable, albeit annoying motherfucker. He talks to an action figure like a real person, he treats real people like shit, and he likes to dry hump inanimate objects. Todd is fucked in the head and the end of the video shows it too. Its the final self awareness moment, and its the worst. Look I'm all for celebrating when I get past a very difficult part of a game, but not like Todd does. Its the final moment of anger I experience before the video ends and I can only think of one thing.....
WHO THE FUCK ACTS LIKE THIS!?!?!?
In closing, the video did do a good job with showing off features of the Wii U but this whole Todd thing was unnecessary. Whatever happen to just showing off the technology without a story ark? Why do companies need to have people acting like spazzes when playing a game? I have notice this trend becoming more popular and it makes me ashamed to know that I am somehow indirectly responsible for this sort of shit happening. I mean, are these people PAID to act like this? I don't know anyone that acts like this in real life, what makes these companies decide to have people act like this? I understand that they want to have the video be family friendly, but this is just ridiculous. #speakup
I understand that, and it does a great job at showing what the Wii U can do. The execution is just horrid though and completely unnecessary. #speakup(Edit comment)
So Nintnedo's FB posted a pic of Iwata and his employees monitoring the pre-E3 thing they have going on Nintendo Direct page. I enhanced the image and I am not sure if the employees are doing their job... #speakup(Edit comment)
It's like the clock strikes midnight and I get a load of those stupid "Something went wrong" error messages for ever single one of my comments, making me have copy my comment to reload the page, and paste it again.
This is the craziest thing. I post a ton of times every day, but this is the one error I have not been getting. How utterly strange. I usually see all of the errors... #speakup(Edit comment)
So I watched my first episode of Deadman Wonderland on the new Toonami (this was actually the second episode of the show, since I missed the first). It was .... interesting. Very, very strange. Not a bad take on the whole "make death row into a survival sport" concept, if an even more disturbing concept than I would have expected from the premise.
If you think it's twisted now, wait until later. I'm not sure how brutal the anime will be in comparison to the manga, but it's pretty crazy. #speakup(Edit comment)
Bahahaha! Watching this makes me want to see a God of War game where Medic!Kratos has two long defibrillator paddles on chains and runs around electrocuting everyone.
Yes, I know real defibrillators are designed against this sort of abuse. I recommend that we all become CPR-trained (the hospital I spent most of 2011 volunteering in held a class recently). Still funny, though.
Fallout New Vegas Ultimate Edition $19.96 until 9/7 at [Frys.com] in store and online also other deals like Skyrim for 39.96 and Fallout 3/ Oblivion $19.96 among others.
Sooo uhh, Alan Wake sequel likely at E3?
[twitter.com]
#speakup
(Edit comment)#tips
So bright.....
#speakup
(Edit comment)Note: This is a personal rant post, you can skip it if you want to.
Living in a tropical country with high level of humidity means I have this dependency on using Air Conditioner system a little bit too much. I know it's not good for my skin in long term but either I sleep with AC on or I sleep nekkid!
I feel your pain Rook (the name of that cat). #speakup
(Edit comment)First off -- THIS IS NOT A SEXIST POST. I'm relaying an event I went through less than 30 minutes ago on PSN. I was playing poker in Playstation Home and made the "mistake" of saying my girlfriend had ran from the house because the "CD" (Carbon Dioxide) alarm was going off. The most pretentious person I've ever met in my life -- online or off -- gave me so much shit, saying I must mean "CM" (Carbon Monoxide). She went on with a ton of "lololololol, this guy is a fucking RETARD and I hope he chokes to death and his girlfriend deserves to die, just to save her from him!" Even after I said that, yes, I meant Carbon MONOXIDE. Not DIOXIDE. Even after that, she kept going. On and on and on and on.
This woman, whose name I won't name, despite her saying she will do "all in her power," to "remove" me from PSN for "being stupid." And her saying she's removed "a bunch of stupid men" and that "removing stupid fucking men when you're an intelligent woman gamer is 'the easiest thing ever.'" She said she was "mega-intelligent." She said she was currently a nurse, who has saved the lives of "thousands." After that, she demanded I compare my college degrees with hers (I didn't, but my college degree is far more impressive).
She DID NOT FUCKING STOP ATTACKING ME FOR OVER AN HOUR, UNTIL I FINALLY LEFT THE GAME (and why should I have been forced out of this game?). Every time I had a bad hand, she typed, "LOL - RETARD MAN FAILS AGAIN!" It was ridiculous. I finally asked the other players to "quiz" us to show if she's smarter. This was AFTER I just gave in and said she was "way" smarter than me. After I said she was a "genius" and I was just "another dork with a penis." It happened way after I said I didn't care if she was smarter and admitted she probably was (although she wasn't, but these are the things we do).
After being attacked for over an hour and after her saying my girlfriend must have "snailtracks and shit-trails" in her "panties" because, "no one would date a freak like you if they could wipe their own assholes" I left the game. Prior to that, I asked if she'd like to play a quiz-show type game like "Buzz" to test our "intelligence." She said something like, "I can't believe how desperate males are to get laid -- even by females who despise them!" I said it had nothing to do with sex and she said that ANY man wanting to talk to or play with a woman wants to "stick his dick" up that woman's "pussy."
This is what I just dealt with. I had NO FUCKING INTEREST in this woman. I don't even know, for sure, if "she" WAS a woman. All I know is that more than just females can feel violated while gaming online. And Kotaku can buy this article from me and give two sides, because I don't feel like we've been shown both sides. All we know, thus far, is that women are raped 77,778 times each before the age of 30 and it's all the fault of the male gamer.
I have NEVER been violent toward a female. I have been nothing but respectful toward female gamers. I don't doubt female gamers have it worse than male gamers, but to pretend that NOTHING ever goes wrong with men gaming with women is BULLSHIT. And I hope this site, and ALL gaming sites, acknowledge that.
'Nuff said.
#SpeakUp
#Cornfield
(Edit comment)Wow damn dude I'm sorry to hear what you had to go through. I'm normally a laid back kind of guy and nothing ever gets to me online. But that girl would have had me clawing at her throat if she were real. It's really sad that people, anyone, would say things like that to anyone else? Is it so hard to respect someone else? I'm not huge into any belief but I tend to like the idea of karma. Let's just say right now I'm really hoping she'll come to understand and reflect on what she did to you and undoubtedly what she's done to others as well.
Don't let her get to you too much though. For every bad person there's 2000 good people. #speakup
(Edit comment)sorry I meant to say if I saw her in person. I believe you that she was real. I would've especially gone ballistic if she were insulting my girlfriend. I can take personal insults fine, but no one ever makes fun of her.
I agree about how sites for some reason never report on men being attacked only eve on women. Would help bring a fair balance to the situation if they did that I think. #speakup
(Edit comment)That person definitely got to you. Sorry you had to put up with an asshole.
Next time, if someone is being -that- irrational and abrasive, just walk away. She was clearly trolling you in every possible way, and the only way to win a game like that is to not play. I know that sucks, as you shouldn't have to get up and leave, but for your sake, it's best to just walk away and find somewhere else to play.
As far as the suggestion that anyone has said that only women get harassed online, that's silly. I don't think anyone who has written an article on the disproportionately poorer treatment of women in gaming would honestly state that no men are ever harassed by women. The point is the disproportionality, not a black and white either/or. Of course men get harassed. They get harassed by other men plenty of the time. They certainly get harassed by women sometimes, too. That's because, regardless of gender, people are still just people. Regardless of what sex organs you have, you're still just as likely to be an asshole as anyone else.
Again, it sucks that you felt like that; though, your displeasure with this jerk has little to do with the larger issue of how women are often treated in the gaming environment. Men can have it rough, too, and that doesn't take away from the rough time that many women are having. In general, there's a problem of dickishness amongst many gamers(and just average human beings), and in gaming, that simply manifests with a lot of mistreatment of women that is disproportionate with the mistreatment of men. Neither should be mistreated; we should work to improve both. Though, when you look at what is the bigger, more common issue, it's that mistreatment of women. We can work on that and encourage a more level playing field or we can just work on discouraging idiocy and cruelty in general. Both are viable options.
Articles may focus on one option, but it doesn't mean they're denying people's ability to choose another way. They're just representing what they personally believe is the best way to tackle the mistreatment of others. Maybe that doesn't line up perfectly with our preferred method or feelings on the subject, but then, we can go about doing our own work to change things. They don't have to be one or the other. If we just argue over what the right focus is, we'll miss out on actually doing what we set out to do. As long as we're all working toward treating others better in our own ways, things can actually improve. Let's just focus on that, speak our peace, and live to improve ourselves and all of those around us as best that we can with the limited time we have. #speakup
(Edit comment)Dang man,that sucks bad,Wish I had been on to at least back you up or something =\
I really do hope kotaku post this. #speakup
(Edit comment)Ouch, I can't imagine how I'd react with such an experience. Luckily I never made an even remotely comparable experience.
That she isn't the brightest light is beyond question, but I wonder how the rest reacted to her? I hope at least you filed a complain against her. #speakup
(Edit comment)The Wii U Classic Pro Controller is the baby of both an Xbox 360 and PS3 controller.
#speakup
(Edit comment)Also, of course, like the PS3, it has symmetrical analog sticks, and unlike the Xbox 360 controller, the D-pad isn't totally worthless. I personally am not a fan of the 360 controller myself, so I'm not really digging this, but eh. To each his own.
But ki_881 is right. It is a melding of both of the controllers...there's just no way to know if it works until people get their hands on it. Well, I guess we'll find out on Tuesday.
(Edit comment)So I watched that broadcast of the Wii U talking about all its features, this isn't about the Wii U though.(But I must admit, I think Nintendo is on to something) No, not about the Wii U at all actually. Its about that video "demonstration" that was played in the middle, as I watched with what I could only describe as feeling of PURE FUCKING RAGE!!!
First off, its starts with this douche-bag screaming his head off about killing zombies. I have a big fucking problem with this already, because A) I have heard his voice and it irritates the shit out of me and B) I'm only 3 seconds in. Next is where the real problem comes in, I see him. Him, with that dry parted hair, that poor ass excuse for a 5 o'clock shadow, those dopy looking hipster glasses, and that unbutton flannel shirt. 5 seconds in and I already want to commit murder. I'm in too deep already, nothing can take my eyes away from the the thing that is building my fury to highest of levels with every second that passes.
The ham is upped to extreme levels of saltiness with the ever so popular spazzing out on the controller, where it looks like the person has lost all control of their bodies, and are on the verge of a epileptic seizure. There's the "trash talking", which is nothing more then what a 3 year old can pull out of its ass trying to do the same thing. He crack his knuckles, as do I because I'm about ready to punch my screen. I'M ONLY 10 FUCKING SECONDS IN!!!
At this point my blood starts to rush as my adrenalin is kicking in. Veins are popping out of my neck, hands are shaking, beads of sweat are forming on my forehead. Either I'm about to have a heart attack, or shooting rampage, I have no idea because all I'm thinking in my head is "DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE!" as the guy says the same thing......its like hes mocking me. Then as if to add insult to injury, he starts to lose and begins to whine about it. Great, as if his voice wasn't bad enough already, now its raised a few octaves higher to nails on chalkboard levels of annoyance. I begin to see red.
That's when the self awareness of the video kicks in. The guy proclaims if he doesn't beat the boss he's going to start talking to himself like a crazy person, to which he turns to an action figure of a Mexican wrestler with bat wings holding Conan the Barbarians sword to get reassurance. The video already knows its ridiculously stupid at this point, so why not just make even less sense, and bitch slap its viewers in the face. Keep in point, that the video hasn't even made it to the features of the Wii U yet, this is all just the set up.
Then the Wii U controller asks him about is mood. He says complete despair, I say 'so angry that I could kick kittens and punch babies.' So, he asks for help. Every word that is said, every gesture that is made, every action that is preformed by this guy is just fuels the rage even more. I want it to end, but I can't stop it. Even the posts that he reads make them sound more pathetic then what they actually are. He finds out that other people are having the same problem and states that he's not alone after all. No, you are alone, very alone.
Now, I'm already in pure fucking hell at this point, but the video doesn't think I have had enough. The video miraculously pulls in another annoying character out of thin air, although slightly less then what has already been on the screen. Oh, by the way, the douchschnozzle that I have been going on about does have a name, its....ugh, Todd. Anyway, this new character, who's name is Warren, is a stalker because apparently he has nothing better to do then to sip coffee, while picking up chicks and spy on his "friend" over the internet.
He sees Todd is in trouble and jumps on the opportunity to call him up, insult him, invite himself over to play Wii U, beat his games, and has no remorse about it either. Oddly enough, I am fine with this. I think Todd deserves this kind of shabby treatment all the time, then again that's probably why Todd is the way he is anyway. Just the trials of life beating Todd with a dick to the face every chance it gets and not giving a damn when a little bit of spooge gets in his eye. Todd just sits there and takes it because Todd is a little fucking nancy boy. FUCK YOU TODD!!!
Obviously Todd has no time for Warren and rejects all his shit. What the fuck Todd? Not only are you annoying but an asshole too, Todd. Your best friend is going to help you with those nasty zombies but you decide to take the advice of someone else and tell Warren to fuck off, Todd. You made Warren cry, Todd! Again, FUCK YOU TODD!
Here's where the video gets a little weird, it tries to take a stab at some comedy relief. It doesn't cut back to Todd immediately after he hangs up on Warren, but stays on Warren for a few more seconds as he watches a mildly attractive female sits at the table across from him. He tries to initiate conversation with her by stating that they are both drinking coffee and that coffee drinkers have a lot in common, she rejects his shit too. Damn, nobody likes Warren today. Whats troubling about this is that it has no place in a Wii U demonstration video, at all. Its another one of those self awareness moments that the video does and it wasn't funny either.
The rage did subside for a moment while all that was going on, but then it cuts back to Todd, and the rage returned as quickly as it did the first time. Todd takes this advice from OctoG123 about some shit for pockets of puss and goes on playing the game again. Todd must have not played the tutorial because he has no idea what OctoG is talking about and fails again. Note to self, never partner up with Todd if the zombie apocalypse happens. In fact, do Todd a favor and just shoot him. Todd being the hapless dumbass that he is still needs help, so he wants to talk to OctoG face to face.
Now for the first time in the whole video, there is a non annoying character talking to Todd, and he's too good for him. OctoG is a 80 year old man, he rides a rascal, insults Todd, and plays video games. All of this is introduced within the first few seconds of OctoG being on the screen. I especially like the parts where he insults Todd and he does it a lot. I am overwhelmed with joy. Good on OctoG, he must hate Todd as much as I do. OctoG instructs Todd to call him Grandpa, Todd being the little bitch that he is doesn't want to. Fuck, Ill call him Grandpa, because this man just oozes alpha male status compared to Todd. Grandpa fucks Todd's mom and tells him about it, probably even makes Todd watch it over the Wii U. That's just how awesome Grandpa is.
Anyway, Grandpa doesn't take any shit from Todd. He tells Todd what to do, being all snarky, and insulting. Making Todd call him his best friend in front of his action figure who is apparently Todd's real best friend. No wonder everyone insults Todd, he puts an action figure above real people. Todd is embarrassed and cuts Grandpa as quick as possible, good thing Grandpa got one final insult in before Todd could be a asshole again. So ends the best 30 seconds of the video, character wise anyway.
Now were just back to Todd and his stupid fucking action figure. Todd obeys Grandpa like he should, because Grandpa is fucking awesome and Todd knows it. So Todd goes back to spazzing out on the controller, and dry humps it for some reason too. At this point, I'm just at a loss for words and/or feelings. Then the unthinkable happens, Todd wins the game, or maybe its just wins that one part of the game, I don't know. What I do know though is that Todd is one unstable, albeit annoying motherfucker. He talks to an action figure like a real person, he treats real people like shit, and he likes to dry hump inanimate objects. Todd is fucked in the head and the end of the video shows it too. Its the final self awareness moment, and its the worst. Look I'm all for celebrating when I get past a very difficult part of a game, but not like Todd does. Its the final moment of anger I experience before the video ends and I can only think of one thing.....
WHO THE FUCK ACTS LIKE THIS!?!?!?
In closing, the video did do a good job with showing off features of the Wii U but this whole Todd thing was unnecessary. Whatever happen to just showing off the technology without a story ark? Why do companies need to have people acting like spazzes when playing a game? I have notice this trend becoming more popular and it makes me ashamed to know that I am somehow indirectly responsible for this sort of shit happening. I mean, are these people PAID to act like this? I don't know anyone that acts like this in real life, what makes these companies decide to have people act like this? I understand that they want to have the video be family friendly, but this is just ridiculous. #speakup
(Edit comment)It's gonna be okay. #speakup (Edit comment)
Dragon's Dogma loading screen message: "Why should travelers stick to the roads? They are are free and relatively safe of monsters."
Hmmm, proof reading could help you some Capcom! #speakup
(Edit comment)I helped make a little nostalgic Nintendo conference countdown timer with a friend of mine and thought I'd share it here
[iruntheinternet.com]
(Edit comment)#speakup
Alan Wake 2 teasing? YES PLEASE!
[www.ign.com]
#speakup
(Edit comment)#tips
So Nintnedo's FB posted a pic of Iwata and his employees monitoring the pre-E3 thing they have going on Nintendo Direct page. I enhanced the image and I am not sure if the employees are doing their job... #speakup (Edit comment)
DAMMIT KOTAKU!
It's like the clock strikes midnight and I get a load of those stupid "Something went wrong" error messages for ever single one of my comments, making me have copy my comment to reload the page, and paste it again.
ANNOYING.
EDIT: HA, HAPPENED WHILE POSTING THIS, TOO!
#speakup
(Edit comment)#kotakueditorialboard
"The Pyramids were built by the Wayans Brothers." Evil stare.
Bill Hader as Charlie Sheen.
#speakup
(Edit comment)#SNL
You went and saw that abomination pretending to be Snow white?!
Seriously why keep the name!!! #speakup
(Edit comment)Snow White and the The Mighty Avenger?
#sorry
(Edit comment)#chrishemsworth
#speakup
So I watched my first episode of Deadman Wonderland on the new Toonami (this was actually the second episode of the show, since I missed the first). It was .... interesting. Very, very strange. Not a bad take on the whole "make death row into a survival sport" concept, if an even more disturbing concept than I would have expected from the premise.
Casshern Sins hopefully tomorrow.
#speakup
(Edit comment)#deadmanwonderland
#toonami
Holy crap I lost ten more pounds....Guess that's why my work pants felt like they were falling off today.
I guess my car dying has an ongoing silver lining. #speakup
(Edit comment)BEEF CAKE! #speakup (Edit comment)
My planned snack food/E3 binge with sprinkles of Diablo 3 and reading tomorrow laughs in the face of the concept of keeping it off.
But I'll certainly try, and with no real possibility to get another car for....a very long time, makes me hopeful I can shed a few more. #speakup
(Edit comment)Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle YEAH!
Yes...That just happened. #speakup
(Edit comment)"Are you tired of being a 90lb weakling?!"
"I only weigh 90lbs..." #speakup
(Edit comment)I weigh 245 pounds.
But I'm also around 6'8" tall. :p #speakup
(Edit comment)I was 230 when I had a car.
210! Hooray! I'm slightly less of a fatass!
(Edit comment)#speakup
"That is disgustingly ____"
Erotic.
Come on folks, fill in the blanks on what is in Kellogg's head. #speakup
(Edit comment)"That is disgustingly _____"
Delicious. #speakup #WhatWaffleSaid
(Edit comment)""That is disgustingly ____"
Beautiful #speakup #WhatWaffleSaid
(Edit comment)Bahahaha! Watching this makes me want to see a God of War game where Medic!Kratos has two long defibrillator paddles on chains and runs around electrocuting everyone.
Yes, I know real defibrillators are designed against this sort of abuse. I recommend that we all become CPR-trained (the hospital I spent most of 2011 volunteering in held a class recently). Still funny, though.
#speakup
(Edit comment)#defibrillators
Fallout New Vegas Ultimate Edition $19.96 until 9/7 at [Frys.com] in store and online
also other deals like Skyrim for 39.96 and Fallout 3/ Oblivion $19.96 among others.
[www.frys.com]
[www.frys.com]:TOP_BANNER:Spot1
(Edit comment)#tips
#speakup
I think this is a fantastic Minecraft animation, you should too.
Oddly enough makes me want a Lego Avatar game. #speakup #tips
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