Sexy. Screwed up. Strange. Outrageous. We here at Kotaku deal with topics befitting all those words. We dealt with them this year, too. So grab your laptops and find a dark corner, folks, 'cause we're dealing with some of the naughtiest and nastiest stuff 2013 had to offer.
Enjoy our selection of this year's NSFW pickings, but for the love of God and all that is holy, don't do it around other people (unless they're into this sort of thing).
Jiggle physics are serious business, so much so that the Japanese Rocket News went ahead and investigated the relationship between game boobs and real boobs using... experiments.
Probably one of the most disgusting things I've ever seen. Still, I'd imagine it must be tasty. It looks like it's filled with strawberry jam. Yum!
She's one of the oldest female video game icons out there, so it's natural that a glitch like this would be extremely popular. Even if it looks as weird as it does.
Not very sexy at all. More uncomfortably funny than anything, really.
A thoughtful study of the relationship between sexual sado-masochism and the torture-yourself-with-roguelikes-and-NES-platformers kind of sado-masochism. They've got more in common than you'd think!
The legendary journeys of the Wingjing Streaker. Shine on, you crazy bastard.
It's virtual reality. Erotic video games are a given. That's just how humans work.
Yep, this is a thing. Can you guess who came up with it?
Japan discovers iOS 7's blurry tiles. What follows, of course, is a veritable storm of fake porn.
Best of both worlds? Best of both worlds.
Censorship can be annoying as hell, but in this case it's actually quite hilarious.
From penis-shaped Spore creatures to massive dick mods in Skyrim, the gaming scene is positively inundated with male genitalia. We attempt to find out why.
It's called The Ureshino Sightseeing House of Hidden Treasures. Even the name is funny.
New moderation means a whole slew of new ASCII schlongs.
The protagonist of Saints Row IV is one smooth operator.
Just think of all the possibilities for virtual voyeurism. Typing that out makes me feel intense shame. I apologize.
Japan really likes their fake porn.
Beyond: Two Souls has a shower scene. Really, this is pretty much the most logical thing that could've happened.
"May not be cosplayable," said Hideo Kojima about Quiet, the scantily-clad sniper of MGSV. Obviously, he was wrong.
Saving the worst for the last.
Well, that's all folks. Here's to another Kotaku fish-filled year.
Questions? Comments? Contact the author of this post at andras-AT-kotaku-DOT-com.