Kotaku: Rant

A Strong Kick in the Face to People Upset With Online Passes

Mike Fahey — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 11:00:00 EST

In today's profanity and insult-laden Speak Up on Kotaku, commenter Skeletal-Minion tells us exactly what he thinks about people that complain about Online Passes and other used sales-thwarting measures. More »

I Just Ordered SoulCalibur V From Amazon and a Tiny Part of Me Died

Mike Fahey — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 17:00:00 EST

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Though hundreds of thousands of gamers swear by Amazon.com when it comes to ordering new releases or old favorites, I've never once ordered a video game from the popular online marketplace. Despite the allure of free launch day delivery and bonus credit, I've limited my game spending to local retailers. I didn't realize why until I finally caved and purchased SoulCalibur V online. More »

So Another Hall-of-Famer Sued EA Sports. Should Video Gamers Care?

Owen Good — Sat, 08 Oct 2011 16:00:00 EDT

As multiple lawsuits have been brought in multiple venues by multiple former college athletes—some of whom are actually more recognizable as professional stars—I've tried to pull back to the big picture of what really faces video gamers and (principally) EA Sports in the parade of litigation over unauthorized use of likenesses in sports video games. More »

The Social Games Rant You Didn't Hear from GDC

Owen Good — Sun, 06 Mar 2011 15:00:00 EST

By all accounts, "No F@*#king Respect: Social Game Developers Rant Back" was a hit at Game Developers Conference 2011. A standing-room only crowd listened to a panel of eminent designers address the virtues of and double-standards applied to social games. More »

A Role-Playing Game That Makes You Pay For Your Party Members [Update]

Mike Fahey — Fri, 04 Mar 2011 13:40:00 EST

During my play through of role-playing game Hyperdimension Neptunia I am delighted to welcome a new character into my party, but the NIS America-inspired Nisa won't fight with me or gain experience. She just sits there, until I pay. More »

The Gold Card

Owen Good — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 22:30:00 EDT

Today I got a new credit card. It's actually the same credit card I've had for 14 years. But now it's called the "Chase Freedom" card, which sounds like some piece of shit good only at your participating Family Dollar. More »

In Defense of — and a Salute to — The Pro

Owen Good — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 18:20:00 EST

Two jackasses baiting an Xbox Live moderator and getting banned isn't worth much outrage. But when they doctor a video and expect everyone to believe it on the knee-jerk faith that mods are fascists, that just insults your intelligence. More »

Band Hero Track Edits Are Ridiculous

Mike Fahey — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 16:00:00 EST

If you are planning on picking up Band Hero because it contains some of your favorite songs, be warned that some of the tunes have been ~~butchered~~ edited beyond enjoyment. More »

Outgoing IGDA Chief Departs With a Rant

Owen Good — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 14:30:00 EDT

This was said in the context of the GDC's notorious annual rant session, so, it's not a classic burning of bridges in the last day on the job. More »

Getting Paid at GameStop: Not as Simple as it Should Be

Owen Good — Sun, 15 Feb 2009 13:00:00 EST

GameStop employees can't get paper checks. True, most of the civilized world is on direct deposit by now. But for GameStoppers who aren't, the only alternative is a cash card that nickel-and-dimes them. More »

Please, Economic Crisis, Put An End To The Christmas Rush

Luke Plunkett — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 06:00:00 EST

As a part-time gamer, Christmas must be brilliant, because not only do you get some time off work to play games, but you’ll probably receive games for Christmas as well. Double score. More »

Nintendo: "We've Had A New Logo For Two Years"

Luke Plunkett — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 02:00:00 EST

Strange days yesterday, when a press release from Nintendo Europe turned up. It said "stop using the red Nintendo logo". Seemed...odd. People were confused. Today, Nintendo have responded. Speaking to CVG, a Nintendo UK spokesperson has said the news is "two years late", citing the use of white, black and grey logos on Nintendo products and publications in recent years. Well, no shit! We're not blind. We know there have been grey logos on Nintendo stuff for a few years now. Bit hard to miss them. The point was that Nintendo were now specifically telling people not to use the "old" red logo. In other words, we were interested in the death of the red logo, not the inception of the others. And, on a purely symbolic, reading-too-much-into-it level, everything that entailed. For years, no, decades, Nintendo were red. Sega were blue. Seems simple, seems shallow, seems stupid, but that's the way it was. Kids grew up divided along those lines, that growing up made an impression, and people ended up identifying large international companies with a colour scheme. Heck, it's the same today. The Xbox brand is green. In the grand scheme of things, changing that colour isn't important. It's not going to affect game sales, it's not going to affect hardware sales, it's not going to result in angry fan petitions being dropped in a bag of flaming dog crap at Cammie Dunaway's house. But it's still enough to make people a little misty-eyed for a part of their video game upbringing, small as it may be, that is now no more. So rather than blithely dismissing this as "oh, old news", Nintendo, know we couldn't give a shit about your new colour scheme. Or how long you've had it. Just give us a minute to mourn the old one. More »

Shigeru Miyamoto, Broken Record

Brian Ashcraft — Fri, 14 Nov 2008 02:00:00 EST

Shigeru Miyamoto is a great game designer, we all know that. He's an incredibly insightful and intelligent man. Likewise, that we all know. Yet, lately his interview responses sound, we dunno, canned? Take these recent responses regarding Wii Music: More »

Consoles, Who Needs 'em?

Brian Ashcraft — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 03:00:00 EDT

Apparently not John Welch, CEO of casual games company PlayFirst. He says that the console per se is a "niche platform" and that they're just too expensive to make. His argument: More »

China Brings Bullshots To The Olympics

Brian Ashcraft — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 03:00:00 EDT

"Bullshots" are nothing new for gamers. Penny Arcade coined the term a few years to describe game screenshots that looked too good to be true — and are. Photoshopping and CG graphics are nothing new to the game world — hence gamers general suspicion about pretty and shiny things — but are finding use larger than game PR. Issues like governmental state PR. More »

How GameFly is Like Your Psycho Ex

Owen Good — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 20:00:00 EDT

I don't get these notices because, wisely, I didn't opt in for the ~~mailing list~~ spam like this guy at The -Minus World. And he acknowledges that he could just as easily unsubscribe, but it's much more fun to cast GameFly's obsessive spam engine in the role of psychotic stalky ex. Especially when you can send yourself a message that says "You better not be fucking Netflix" and take a screenshot of that to illustrate the point. Oh, not to mention: "We've Received: A Restraining Order." You can see the descent into madness in four well-done screen shots of his inbox. Gamefly Needs To Stop Acting Like A Psycho Ex-Girlfriend [The -Minus World] More »

What's All This "PlayStation Wars" Business?

Luke Plunkett — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 05:30:00 EDT

We were flooded by emails today from readers tipping us off about this piece, which for some reason made it to Yahoo News' front page. The story - based off a report conducted by Toward Freedom - suggests that Sony's humble PlayStation 2 "has fuelled a brutal conflict in the Democratic Republic of Congo". Huh? More »

Things We Don't Ever Want To See At E3 Again. Ever.

Luke Plunkett — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 09:20:00 EDT

E3 was a disappointment. But you knew that already. Yet do you know why it was a disappointment? Sure, there are the easy answers. Few new game announcements. Anything Nintendo said or did. But they're just that. Easy answers. There were a lot more things wrong with the show than just those limelight-grabbers. Things that we never want to see at E3 again. Ever. More »

"Non-Games Are For Non-Gamers"

Brian Ashcraft — Thu, 01 May 2008 05:00:42 EDT

Frustrated with the current gaming climate? Alex Kierkegaard at website Insomnia sure as shit is. He's got a biting (and often nasty) take on the sales situation in Japan. I quite like Kierkegaard and appreciate what he does with Insomnia, which has a very strong focus on Japanese games and developers I love like Cave. Here's a snippet from his rant: More »

Why The Bad Company Win Isn't A Win At All

Luke Plunkett — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 02:00:01 EDT

So EA & DICE have, as you've probably heard, altered their decision to charge users for certain weapons in the upcoming Battlefield: Bad Company. Cue high-fives and slapped backs across the internet. It's a victory! Score one for the little guy! Take that, big business! I'm sure a lot of people feel very proud of themselves! Thing is, how many of you have really sat back and considered what, exactly, just happened? More »

Game "Decorated" Cakes Aren't Game Cakes

Mike Fahey — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:00:00 EDT

This is not a video game cake. Here at Kaketaku, we are constantly getting submissions like this, and quite frankly I am getting sick of it. Any Publix baker can make a plain vanilla sheet cake and paint Mario on top of it with colored frosting. Hell, I could make a sheet cake and paint my ass on top of it but you wouldn't see it being posted on a sex cake website. Effort, people. You have to build a video game cake. Shape it Mold it. Sure, pixel cupcakes are just tiny frosted cakes, but the come together to form something. Effort was put into composition. If you're going to create a square cake and paint something on top of it you might as well just buy some Betty Crocker and stick the DVD case of your favorite game on top of the frosting. Some of our commenters argue that video game cakes started off as simple frosted sheets, and I agree...but unless you are throwing a retro kitsch party than that shit doesn't fly anymore. Just my two cups of powdered sugar. More »

THQ Creative Director Rants On Piracy, Death Of Iron Lore

Michael McWhertor — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 19:20:00 EST

When Iron Lore Entertainment announced it was closing its doors, some readers found it hard to believe. After shipping two quality products, with another promising project underway, how did several unspecified "unrelated events" put Iron Lore out of commission? Michael Fitch, Director of Creative Management at THQ, publisher of both Titan Quest titles, helps to shed some light on part of the reason in a rant posted yesterday to the Quarter To Three forums. More »

Game Publishers Hold Enthusiast Press in Contempt

Brian Ashcraft — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 02:00:45 EST

Still having trouble making sense of this whole Eidos-CNet-Gamespot clusterfuck? Newsweek's N'Gai Croal does a nice job of summing up what it all means. N'Gai writes: More »

Brownback Blog Late To Handheld Dangers Party

Mike Fahey — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 10:40:17 EDT

With their candidate on the brink of no longer being a candidate, the unofficial Sam Brownback blog has found some time to try and generate some anti-gaming hysteria, dredging up two relatively ancient stories in the name of ruining Christmas for children across the country. The main gist of the article is the Nintendo DS as a tool for child molesters. It includes video of the news story I dissected back in February and some extremely entertaining propaganda speech.

Introduced in 2004, the Nintendo DS (for Dual Screen or Devil Screen), this game machine has sold some 700 million or so units. That's an epidemic. It's undeniable that it has been a "success" for its Japanese manufacturer, Nintendo (makers of Donkey Kong aka Monkey Donkey, a game in which a monkey kidnaps a young girl to satisfy his bestial desires). It's also been a tremendous success for pedophiles everywhere.

Why Does Turning on My 360 Make Me Nervous?

Brian Ashcraft — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 05:00:26 EDT

Sunday night, I settle in for some Gears of War single player. Ten minutes in, my Xbox 360 freezes up. I switch it off. Fire the machine back up, and two minutes in, the thing freezes up. Turn off the console. Wash, rinse, repeat. After a few times, I could get the 360 to play through a game without freaking the fuck out. The harder games have the Xbox 360 work, the more likely the console is to die. My 360 is sick, and the rot is setting in. I can hear the death rattle. More »

How Companies Can Avoid Countdowns

Brian Ashcraft — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 02:00:35 EDT

For a generation of marketers raised on TV and print, the internet is a gray nebulous. What works in traditional media? Getting as many eyes on a new product as possible — that creates buzz. But since the internet doesn't have "Prime Time" per se and is powered by a series of sites (not channels or publishers), focusing those eyes all at one time and one place poses a challenge online. More »

Bethesda Counts Down To "Please Stand By"

Brian Ashcraft — Tue, 05 Jun 2007 04:00:15 EDT

Thirty-four days ago, Bethesda began a countdown for its upcoming RPG Fallout 3. And what did this huge build up count down to? A screen that says "Stand By." Why? Probably a gazillion people clicking "refresh" in unison. More »

Nintendo Fans Are Never Happy

Brian Ashcraft — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 02:00:17 EDT

You can please some of the fans sometimes, but none of the Nintendo fans none of the times. Over at Newsweek's Level Up, GoNintendo's Kevin Cassidy (cool sunglasses, dude) takes the mic and challenges how some view all things not truly Nintendo: More »

On Women and Gaming

Brian Crecente — Mon, 12 Mar 2007 18:47:28 EDT

Why aren't there more female gaming bloggers? More »

Jack to Crecente: You Are a Hypocrite, Curious

Brian Crecente — Wed, 25 Oct 2006 14:17:19 EDT

Facing a contempt hearing in a few hours, Jack Thompson sent out a letter to the press explaining how he is the one being bullied over the game Bully. More »

World of Warcraft Needs to Grow-Up

Brian Crecente — Tue, 22 Aug 2006 12:00:19 EDT

I was talking over the weekend with some friends about the World of Warcraft. I'm not a WoW player, but I did play it back when it launched. More »

Opinion: In Defense of Wii

Brian Ashcraft — Fri, 28 Apr 2006 13:20:15 EDT

Okay, so the name sucks. The general consensus is that Nintendo's boffed naming their new console. The moniker is reminiscent of everything from the French word for "yes" to the childish word for "urine." Not exactly the association that Nintendo was looking for, but is that why everyone is freaking out? More »

The Glory of the Shooter

Brian Crecente — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 12:00:15 EDT

Ah, nothing like a bile-clearning rant to kick-start a Monday. Clive Thompson's latest column is all about the pure, simple, violent pleasures of running-and-gunning first-person shooters. Screw plot, screw game mechanics, screw intricacies, screw complexity, sometimes all you really need is to deliver an up-close-and-personal gut shot to a friend with a sawed off. More »

On MSoft's Axing Maruyama

Brian Ashcraft — Fri, 17 Feb 2006 19:22:59 EST

Yoshihiro Maruyama's business card reads "Executive Officer, General Manager, Xbox Division." Rather, it read. The Xbox Japan's boss has been moved into another position within the company due to the company's poor domestic sales. More »

PSP UMD Movies Not Doing So Hot

lsmith — Thu, 16 Feb 2006 13:43:23 EST

Guess what? Just because the PSP can play movies on it, doesn't mean that the majority of people want to run out and watch movies on its screen. Variety reports that Sony's handheld hasn't turned out to be the second coming in movie viewing that Sony hoped it would be. UMD sales aren't blowing anyone away (they for the most part blow) and as a result studios are cutting back the number of UMDs they make. Gee, what could've caused UMD sales to sag? Could it be that the UMD format movies were grossly overpriced? Could it be that watching movies on a handheld doesn't appeal to the "average consumer?" Could it be that not everyone has a public transportation commute where something like watching a movie on a handheld would be a pretty decent way to pass the time? UMD Prices were too high from day one and with studios starting to pull back the titles they were going to issue on UMD the window of opportunity that otherwise may have been there - is closing. More »

Why Companies Should Leak Manuals

Brian Ashcraft — Thu, 09 Feb 2006 12:22:49 EST

It was d j vu. The topics were the carbon copies. The post titles were the identical. Hell, even the file formats were the same. More »

Anti-Copying Malware Leaves PCs Susceptible

lsmith — Mon, 30 Jan 2006 19:20:36 EST

Boing Boing points to a piece of software that self-installs when you install certain PC games, and although it's designed to prevent pirating it actually damages your system. From Boing Boing: "The software causes system instability and crashes." Ouch. There's a list of games that currently employ the Starforce security measures here. Check out your game library, and more importantly, check out the literature over at the official "Boycott Starforce" website. It's like rootkits all over again. More »

Should Game Companies Hire More Lobbyists?

kourosh — Sun, 29 Jan 2006 15:37:19 EST

Check out this article in the Wall Street Journal, which says internet companies like Google are hiring lawyers and lobbyists in Washington big time to defend their interests and fend off rival industries, like telecom. It got me thinking: Video game companies should be hiring lobbyists like crazy, too. More »

Has Microsoft Japan Given Up?

Brian Ashcraft — Thu, 26 Jan 2006 10:22:43 EST

Take a look at Microsoft Japan Release Calendar, and you'll find an empty hole. Two titles are listed. There's the mahjong Toryumon and Kameo. That's all, folks. More »

Cannibalism IS a Threat to America's Youth!

lsmith — Wed, 30 Nov 2005 17:40:42 EST

Seriously, why is garbage like this seeing the light of day? No, not the AP piece itself, but the story of video game critics taking aim at cannibalism in gaming. Apparently gorging on some player-character or NPC's flesh in a game now really chaps the National Institute on Media and Family's ass. Stubbs the Zombie isn't a threat to the youth of America, bad parents and irresponsible adults blaming gaming companies for their shortfalls as people are. More »