Yesterday Nintendo premiered the Cat Mario Show on the eShop in Europe. It's an edutainment show aimed at kids who want to learn facts about Nintendo properties. It's also mildly terrifying for reasons I can't quite explain.
Here are some things I learned from The Cat Mario Show.
1. Cat Mario and Cat Peach are British. No longer does Mario talk like a broad Italian stereotype, but like your brother-in-law Tom from Sussex. I did not see this on the Super Mario wiki, but must assume it is canon.
2. The cat suit also seems to have warped their vocal chords. They speak in a high, reedy, helium-fueled pitch. Nothing can exhaust their energy. They will talk for hours and hours without stopping, blinking or resting. You will tire before they do, because they are cat puppets and they are legion.
3. Cat Puppets love trivia about Mario™ and Kirby™. It's all they know. It is important that children know trivia about Mario™ and Kirby™, otherwise they will never get a job in this rough-and-tumble economy.
Seriously, though — The Cat Mario Show is weird. (Update: Some commenters have brought up that this is a localization of a show called Nyan Nyan Neko Mario Time)