Kirk, I'm not upset with you, I'm just a little disappointed. You took a great concept—the Sportsbros, EA Sports' trio of next-gen pitchmen—and you only gave them word balloons? An entire legion of my best Photoshoppers awaits, to make the Sportsbros even funnier than you could possibly imagine, in the Kotaku 'Shop Contest.
So here we are. You don't have to be a sports fan to see the theme here. These aren't gamefaces as much as they are expressions of disappointment or disapproval. But where Kirk thought up some hilarious lines, I need you guys to be less text-heavy. Put them in a situation where their cold gaze makes everything awkwardly hilarious.
Source Image: Lionel Messi on the cover of FIFA 14.
Source Image: Kyrie Irving on the cover of NBA Live 14.
Source Image: Adrian Peterson on the cover of Madden NFL 25.
Go to town. See you back here on Saturday. Also: Lionel, Adrian, Kyrie, if you'd like to judge the entries we'd be glad to run a mini-profile of you, like with did with the South Park cosplayer last Saturday and Joey Chiu yesterday. Just hit me up at email@example.com.
While most of you are smart enough to figure out how to upload images, here are some simple steps to take for those less familiar with the practice.
1. Create your 'Shop and save it to your desktop.
2. Go to the bottom of this post and click "Discuss."
3. This brings up a comment window. Click the icon that looks like a picture.
4. This brings up another window called "Insert Image." Click "Choose file" if you're uploading your 'shop from your desktop
5. Alternatively, you can upload the 'Shop to a free image hosting service. I suggest imgur. Then paste the image's URL into the field that says "Image URL." Note: this must be the URL of the image itself, not the page where it is displayed. That means the URL ends in .jpg, .gif, .png, whatever.
6. Add editorial commentary and hit submit and your image will load. If it doesn't, upload the image to imgur and paste the image URL as a comment. I promise I will look at it.
7. Large-size images may not upload properly, though we have seen some big-ass animated .gifs upwards of 5 MB. If you're still having trouble uploading the image, try to keep its longest dimension (horizontal or vertical) under 1000 pixels, or the whole thing under 2 MB.
Alright! Have at it. Thanks very much for your participation.