Stop-motion impressario PES lets loose with food and Frogger in this classic-gaming stop-motion carnival of deeeeelight.

I'm video-whoring today because I'm exhausted from driving to Utah and back this weekend. I was trying to intercept Crecente before he got out of the country, and I knew he had a layover in Salt Lake City. I found him in one of the sleazy airport bars, swilling watery Utah beer and trying to pick up a stewardess who'd been finely aged in recycled cabin air, like fancy cheese in a French cave.

'What is it, Gauger?" he snarled as he caught sight of me. "I'm on vacation, you little twerp."

I told him to untwist his official Day of the Tentacle boxer-briefs and settle down, I wasn't there to steal his frag. "You forgot something," I said, slipping the seemingly empty phials under the lip of the bar to his sweating hand. "You forgot your mission."

He should be well on his way by now. Just between you and me, faithful readers, I'd stock up on surgical masks, Spaghettios and bottled water while there's still time. Eliza Gauger

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