I wouldn't say I'm the biggest fan to the Pirates of the Caribbean films. I really enjoyed the first one, but I felt the strong fan following that Johnny Depp's Captain Jack Sparrow garnered caused the second film to become more Whacky Jack and Friends than the epic pirate saga I was expecting. The bits when Depp wasn't acting kerazy struck me as rather dull, and such is the case with Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End the videogame for the Xbox 360. It looks and sounds downright spectacular at times, but ultimately you're just going through the motions to get to the Jack bits.

Hit the jump for a more in-depth look at the game, including a couple clips complete with color commentary courtesy of my patented stack of DVD's on the coffee table with a camera on top video capture system.

Prince of Pirates

At World's End wants to be Prince of Persia. I suppose if you are making a game about high adventure in exotic lands it doesn't hurt to borrow from the definitive game on the subject. Like PoP, you'll find yourself running up walls, hanging from ledges, making impossible jumps, and navigating various insidious traps in between combat sequences. It does many of the things Prince of Persia does, but just not nearly as well. Sadder still, the few bits that don't feel like a PoP game just aren't very much fun.

Hack, Slash, Repeat

The combat system is being touted as the most dynamic swordplay ever. I'm not sure how they came to that conclusion, but I'll go ahead and run with that. The most dynamic swordfighting ever consists of hitting the A button three or four times. There's also a punch button, so you can do crazy sword-punch-sword combos. When an enemy is about to attack a red circle shows up under their feet, and if you move the stick towards them you will dodge in various piratey ways, which I suppose is kind of dynamic. Fill up your skill meter and you can even perform a rather poorly animated finishing move, killing your opponent by sticking your sword through (or more often near) them.

Creating the 'most dynamic swordplay' ever only to let players take out most enemies using just two normal sword swipes and a punch is kind of like building a super luxiourious sports car with all sorts of cool engine mods, leather seats, comfort control...everything you'd need to ensure a comfortable ride, and then including a 'Get There' button on the dash that simply teleports you to your destination. Sure, you could just take the time to learn how to drive it, navigate the highways and byways, but hey...'Get There' button!

The obvious solution to this dilemna, of course, is to make some places where the 'Get There' button doesn't work for no real apparent reason. Some enemies require you to use the special finishing moves to defeat them in an obvious effort to make people like me shut up.

Hop, Skip, and Jump

Somewhat more enjoyable that the combat, the platforming elements in At World's End can take a little getting used to.

Aside from the obvious knife in the face issue, what really gets in the way of the fluidity of the platformy bits is, oddly enough, the graphics. In a highly detailed pirate-themed world it is often hard to figure out that the rope in the corner of town is for you to climb on and not simple set dressing. Rope is as important to a pirate as rope with a steel claw on the end is to a ninja.

Too Boring For Video: Boss Fights

Here's where the game ground to a screenching alt for me. Just as I am beginning to squeeze some enjoyment out of the jumping and fighting bits, along comes a boss fight the pits Captain Jack Sparrow against some random pirate lord, and instead of pounding away at my dynamic A button I find myself squaring off on a 2D plane playing a bastardized version of captain combat from Sid Meier's Pirates. Instead of watching a dramatic standoff, I am watching three dots on the side of the screen that tell me how to dodge in order to fill up a meter that allows me to counterattack. Basically your opponent will go high, low, or lunge at you, and you have to move the analog stick to match it. Aside from the odd mid-fight event sequence, the whole thing is dreadfully boring. It was at these times I really felt that I didn't want to play the game any longer.

Now that I think about it, those sequences probably play much better on the Wii. It feels like a wiimote tailored sequence ported to the 360, shades of Raving Rabbids. Odd.

The Look, The Feel, of Pirates

The game certainly doesn't look like a Wii game at least. The environments are so finely detailed and atmospheric that you almost ovelook the repetitive NPCs and enemies you encounter within them. Almost. Hard to ignore a prison run almost exclusively by fat, tattooed bald guys.

The characters, for the most part, look like their real life counterparts. Particular attention was paid to the hair - Jack's dreads flow majestically while Will Turner's ponytail bobs along. They've got Sparrow's animations completely nailed. From the little finger wiggle thing he does to his particular swaggering walk, it's in here. They may even have gone a bit too far - when the character comes to a stop from a run he always pulls up short, as if he were getting ready to run the other way. At first it comes off as a nice little homage to some of the films' best scenes, but eventually it will wear on you until you wind up spending a good hour playing the Jack Sparrow is Scared of Everything game. You had to be there. You would have been there, but I got so wrapped up in it my camera batteries died.

Here's Some Rotten Fruit For Your Pirate Booty

The header above was actually said to me by one of the random NPCs in Port Royale, and will remain atop my list of best video game lines of all time. It needs to be sampled into a techno song as soon as humanly possible.

At World's End sound is very passable indeed, though as a guy who has dabbled in voiceover work the sound-alikes are so obviously soundalikes it makes me wince to hear them talk. The actors do a fine job for not being Depp, Knightley, or Bloom - they're just not Depp, Knightley, or Bloom. Call it the audio equivalent of uncanny valley.

Otherwise the music and sound effects come together nicely to make the locations and combat believable and as exciting as combat like this can get, which is what it's supposed to do. Go sound!

At World's End's End

I stand behind what I said at the beginning. This is pretty much Jack's pirate videogame, and when he is in it doing what he does best, you can almost tolerate the inane combat system, the repetitive enemies, and the overall average gameplay. As with many licensed titles, it all comes down to how big a fan you are. If Pirates of the Caribbean is the world to you, you've already got the game and are busy trying to recruit a friend to try out multiplayer while trying to unlock all the secrets in the game.

If you're like me and the movies are just something to satiate your perfectly natural pirate curiosity, there are better ways to spend your time and money. From what I hear there's some good films opening this weekend. Michael Fahey

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