Kotaku
And here I thought the Rock Band bundle couldn't get any better. The picture above is from an eBay auction featuring a new, sealed PlayStation 3 version of Rock Band, two Guitar Hero 3 Gibson SG guitars, and a bleach blond woman dressed up in holiday cheer - and not much else. The highest bidder (U.S. only!) will get the bundle delivered to them on Christmas day personally by model and Suicide Girl wannabe. Fear not, Xbox 360 owners! There is another auction for the 360 version of Rock Band and Halo 3, to be delivered by the slightly less appealing but sure to have a winning personality Zoei. I don't know what it says about me, but the most attractive part of these auctions is that after they give you the game they leave and let you play in peace. Obviously something broken in my head.
UPDATE: Sarah from SuicideGirls.com is a regular Kotaku reader, and wanted to drop us a line explaining that these two women were not, in fact, Suicide Girls at all.
So they do milk things, just not this particular thing. I'm glad a day has passed between the post and the correction, or the milking comments would have exploded. Mmmmmmilking.
First off, any SuicideGirl worth her salt would know better than to risk destroying the game she was selling by wearing dangerously pointy lucite stripper heels and lolling "seductively" (ahem) on the precious equipment.Secondly, Beeporama said "Does anybody still think the Suicide Girls are cool? @Stormrider900 got it right, this is a missed opportunity to do something charitable and cool instead of continuing to milk a dying, increasingly reviled brand for profit." While he's absolutely right, I DO enjoy spending my days milking things for profit (wheee!
Sweet, milky profit!), at least get the ways I am choosing to milk correct. Since apparently our brand is now uncool and reviled, I have very little left to get me through my long, lonely days. Except the milking, of course. And we are not milking anything on, near, or around that auction.
ROCK BAND PS3 GUITAR HERO 3 BUNDLE SANTA'S HELPER [eBay via Polygamia]
Brown, sweet and eatable. Master Chief never tasted so good!
Comments
"bitch, get off mah box before you damage it!"
yeah, we're all broken.
get out mah house! i got gaming to do!
For some reason, this made me think of:
One, cut a hole in a box
Two, put your junk in that box
Three, make her open the box
@GUY_JIN: @dorylomorphs:
What is this, redneck hour? Show some respect to the lady.
And no, I am not joking.
What? Nothing from the Suicide Girl Dani from Californication? I'll pass.
Well we do need someone to play bass.
*prefers brunettes/multidye hair/black hair and GHIII*
I just saw the xbox 360 version of the auction, I think the ps3 one got the better model.
rockbands in this picture? where?
This would be cool if it were for charity or something.
@SkutSkut: agreed, minus GH3. I will say that the chick in the 360 auction has NOTHING on the blond.
@Deadeyereborn: Seriously, dude, thought the same thing. I think we're the only two guys so far in here that have their priorities straight.
"delivered by the slightly less appealing but sure to have a winning personality Zoei."
I'm terrible for laughing at the personality comment
@MasterOfPastures: Because, you know, obviously the lady respects herself and stuff.
So you're paying for this woman's plane ticket too? That sucks.
@MasterOfPastures: Yeah, she looks like she demands respect. Seriously, you CAN NOT respect a stripper/hooker. Not possible.
That poor box.
Does anybody still think the Suicide Girls are cool? @Stormrider900 got it right, this is a missed opportunity to do something charitable and cool instead of continuing to milk a dying, increasingly reviled brand for profit.
God I hope I win that auction. I don't even have a PS3...yet! It is cold here and you know what that means.
@goddessakasha: Damn, stole my thunder as I was typing.
Actully my first reaction was if shes sitting on the box its going to be all smooshed and broken my previous post was standard internet humor.
No, I'm all over that.
I think it would be more funny if they made the girl play the game with you when she delivered it. Someone should tape that awkward moment and put it on youtube.
yummy
@COLDBLOODED BMC: Sorry for the double post but what? Why can't I respect a stripper/hooker? I would argue there are respectable ways to do both. O yeah I forgot, country's puritan roots screw with people's priorities.
@goddessakasha: Totally agree. It's like someone asking for respect for a cam-whore. Not that I'm suggesting that's what she is. I would never do that because that would be all shades of wrong.
omg she's bending the box, that lowers its value. take it back and get me a box in pristine condition, the guitars are already fragile as it is
@MasterOfPastures: Now, if you just bend over a little, I'll grab hold of the stick and pull it out. I don't know how long it's gonna take, it's pretty fall up there, but we'll get through it little buddy.
I've got a package she can unwrap along with some milk for her cookie.
At least I'll have something to do when my strat breaks....gives a new meaning to the word strum bar....ohhhhhhhhh
@zeezee: This thread has reached a new low. and as gandalf I must proclaim YOU SHALL NOT PASS... this level of base humor
@Pegleg Joe: I actually wrote a lengthy rebuttal, then realized YOU can respect a hooker/stripper all you want. I am not puritanical in any way, I enjoy the fact that strippers/hookers (referred to singularly as whores from now on) exist, and are there if I need them, but respect them? Please.
I'll bid on both if I'm allowed to smack each of them in the face with a sledgehammer. It's not like it would make much of a difference for their "careers".
@GUY_JIN: My thoughts exactly. Shes ruining the hardware, get her off it!
Well..you don't look at the mantel when your poking the fire place.
Bring on the holiday cheer!
She better have her nails painted when she gets to my apartment. lol
foot fettish?
"...to be delivered by the slightly less appealing but sure to have a winning personality Zoei..."
"...the most attractive part of these auctions is that after they give you the game they leave and let you play in peace."
I haven't laughed that hard in a while, Fahey. That hurt.
@MasterOfPastures:
You know, if I were taking photos, scantly clad, as a means of advertising a gaming bundle, the first thing I would expect people to think is "wow, what an intelligent and respectable woman. I would like to hold a conversation with her or invite her to share a meaningful. Perhaps she shares interests with me, and we would be willing to discuss commitment and future, politics, economics, and morality!"
I certainly wouldn't ever support disrespecting women, nor would I suggest that her taking photos like this inherently makes her not worth talking to, but this is definitely not one of those issues. Let it go.
Some of you guys really creep me out, you know?
@Heliophage:
*A meaningful lunch, though I suppose you could stick whatever noun your imagination can conjure in its place and the message is still the same.
Good lord, I haven't seen so much foundation on something since I last saw Extreme Engineering.
Plus, clear heels.
Merry Christmas, indeed!
@Heliophage: so, you want your scantily clad gaming related adverts with a beaver shot? sophisticated consumers ftw.
"Obviously something broken in my head" ... Mike... I think you and Flynn need to sit down and have a little talk, if you know what I mean ;)
I'll pass... is that all we get for however much we pay? I eman if you are going to travel half way across the US then you might as well stay a while... PS. i only have a PS3
hmmmmm makes me want to get Rockband....kind of like when Jade tricked me into buying Assassins Creed. Very very shhneaky
How dare she defile the hallowed, pristine halls of gaming with her ... oh, wait -- nevermind. Carry on.
Why would you want that? She's bending the box.
Can I just bid on the girl... pleeeease.
Sophisticated or not, it appeals generally to men's base desires.
Quit being so full of yourselves and if you enjoy it, good for you; and if not, don't worry about it. She gets paid to be sexy, she chose her career and I'm sure she'll be the first to tell you she doesn't feel any less empowered.
And she'd better watch out, those stilettos might scratch something.
@SirUrza: You sure can. And it will cost considerably less than $169, I can assure you.
It's all fun and games until a filthy stileto punches through a tom!
This could be a way for your "fake" rock band to get "real" herpes, just like in Spinal Tap.
"I don't know what it says about me, but the most attractive part of these auctions is that after they give you the game they leave and let you play in peace. Obviously something broken in my head."
Hahaha I'd say. I still love you though, Fahey. Your posts never let me down. :-P
I almost feel bad for the sad, pathetic, lonely gamer loser who's going to pay an exorbitant amount of money to repurchase these games.
What? You know if they're in that category of gamer, they had these preordered and picked up at launch.
@InsomniaBob:
That was the second thing I noticed about the picture, once I stopped eye-raping.
@JayPea:
...what the hell are you talking about?
I was making the argument that she knows what she's doing by taking those pictures, and doesn't need people to defend her when people don't ignore that she's half-naked.
The things people pull out of their asses these days...
@COLDBLOODED BMC: +10. level up!
@Heliophage: And here ...ugh... is a StormTrooper leg!
I hear when reach 200,000 fans you have to play on HARD...ohhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
@PeonCulture: I'm not sure I get the point of this seemingly misogynistic comment.
This is all pretty sick.
she can play wiggle my whammy bar any day
OH YEAH
Haha, I'm always out of town visiting my parents on Christmas. I'd almost want to win this to see the look on their faces when the um, model delivers my present.
@Heliophage: to coin a phrase you might hear in the gum clinic "thanks for clearing that up"
I [i]still[/i] say a girl drumming next to you is hot.
Do you think she's down with a little DP action?
Drum Pedal! What were you thinking, you sick bastards?
I am so glad it's not a Monday!
@zeezee:
Actually I think it's 260,000. ;)