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TGS06: Dead Or Alive Xtreme Jiggle Impressions

Being a guy is awesome, but when your penis starts thinking for you, it can lead to disaster. Such is the case with Dead or Alive Xtreme 2, as yesterday my manhood told me "Hey, this booth girl is pointing you to DOAX2. We should play it." The gelatinous jiggle fest of bikini filled mini-games from Team Ninja was given plenty of room at TGS and the lines were short, if not nonexistant.

After suffering through the same volleyball game I paid $50 for in 2004 (and losing), we decided to give the other aspects a shot. I was already creeped out by the sloppy boob physics but decided to dig deeper.

The jet skiing portion was passable, but the controls were difficult to get a hang of. My brain was starting to tell my crotch "We really need to get out of here and play something worthwhile." Penis responded "Wait, there's a game where you stand on a raft and bump your bottom against the other girl." We compromised to stay for a few more rounds of playtesting.

The butt bumping mini-game was next. Jerk the analog stick back and forth and knock the other bikini clad fighter into the water. Yeah. But we soldiered on to the tug of war bits. Also mildly entertaining for about 2 minutes. Then, the running game. Lay down in the sand, get a good cleavage shot, then whack on the A button to run faster.

Starting to sound like Track & Field for the NES? You might be on to something.

The game seems as shallow as the first, but with better character models, more to do and one new girl to ogle. Maybe there's more depth here than 10 minutes of play can glean, but I hope my brain wins the purchasing war with this one. Michael McWhertor


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