Kotaku 'Shop Contest: Hipster Sixty-Fourrr

On NeoGAF late last night, someone discovered that the awful warehouse of pretension Urban Outfitters was selling cloned Nintendo 64 controllers. This can only mean one thing: Hipsters have discovered that console generation and will now commence to telling everyone they enjoyed it before you did, but now they don't anymore because everyone notices that they enjoy it, even though they actually do want you to notice.

Because I have no 'Shop skills (which is secretly why I administer this contest) I thought, "What I wouldn't give for a shot of Nintendo Sixty-Fourrr Kid in a trilby, with a van dyke and a turtleneck cradling a copy of the Utne Reader." Hence, our current photoshop challenge.

Brandon and Rachel Kuzma were 9 and 6, respectively, on Christmas Day in 1998. That means they're 23 and 20 today, right in the wheelhouse of Urban Outfitters target demographic, or at least the ages most of their shoppers pretend to be.

So for this challenge, setting is going to be important, because slapping a bunch of hipster crap on Brandon and Rachel is only going to go so far, especially given the low-res quality of the exploitable. Café and farmer's market settings are good, so is anything mudane but Instagrammed all to shit to make it look profound.

If you need the original video to pull a screengrab, it's here, 16 million views and all.

Here are the rest of the guidelines for entering.

1. Create your 'Shop and save it to your desktop.
2. Go to the comments beneath this post and click "reply."
3. Click "Add Image" in the comment window.
4. Click "Upload an Image Instead." Then click the "Choose File" button. Browse your desktop, find the image, and click "open."
5. If you prefer, you can upload the 'Shop to a free image hosting service. I suggest imgur. Then click "Add image" in the upper right above the comment window. Paste the image URL into the field that says "Image URL."
6. Add editorial commentary (you can't post an image without some kind of text in the comment field), then just hit submit and your image will load. If it doesn't, upload the image to imgur and paste the image URL as a comment. I promise I will look at it.
7. This is important: Keep your image size under 1 MB. If you're still having trouble uploading the image, try to keep its longest dimension (horizontal or vertical) under 1000 pixels.

All set? Great. Now, Gentlemen, start your 'shopping!