Cinco de Mayo? You mean, another excuse to drinko? Ok, bad joke. I may have started the festivities without you.
In celebration of today's revolutionary accomplishments, we drink. We drink while wearing sombreros and eating guacamole. I'm still waiting to try Kirk's apparently unmatched recipe. Although, it's hard to go wrong when there's avocado involved.
Tying in our two favorite pastimes—namely, drinking and gaming—here are some suggestions for you to get the party going. (But, of course, always drink responsibly and please don't take all of these suggestions too seriously.)
Fruit Ninja Kinect
Fruit Ninja Kinect is a great game to play while drunk, so you can continue the enjoyment while getting drunk off of it. Either tally up the score to save the drinking until after each round, or have the observers drink for the players' mistakes. One method gets you drunker than the other. Rules are to take a shot every time: 1) A bomb is hit, 2) Someone accidentally slices the opponent's fruit in versus mode, and 3) One player hits the other person's hand. But what about all that beer you have laying around? Chug that when: 1) Any of the special banana modes are activated, and 2) For as long as someone is slicing up a pomegranate.
There will be so much to laugh at when playing Trials Evolution. Take a shot whenever someone is juuuuuust about to flip off of their bike, but manages to make it back on the track to continue on their merry motorcycling ways.
Oh, Portal 2. How I love you. And the co-op is just as splendid. Best part about co-op, though? You don't always have to play by the actual rules of the game to have fun. I've often found myself chasing friends around and trying to kill them. Lasers, crushing platforms, taking the floor out from under them; I've discovered diverse ways of keeping entertained in co-op. It's brawler-Portal, and it needs alcohol. So every time your friend manages to kill you, take a shot.
Rayman Origins is another great game to take shots whenever you beat your friend up, or when you leave them to die while you scoop up all coins ahead. You selfish bastard, you. This game needs drunken attention.
Left 4 Dead 2
Left 4 Dead 2 is a particular favorite of mine. I always play it when friends come over. The options for a drinking game with this zombie first-person shooter are endless. Take a shot when you disturb a Witch. Take a shot when you hear a Hunter growl. Chug beer for as long as you're getting strangled by a Smoker and no one comes to your rescue. Take a shot when you, as a Charger, miss your victim by the smallest fraction of an inch (don't you hate when that happens?). The possibilities are limitless.
Just drink. It gets funnier and funner as you play. Take a shot after you lose a round if you need rules.
Pick any Mario Party game. Go ahead. Just traveling across the game's board will get you drunk, but there are lots of fun rules to play by.
Splinter Cell: Conviction
Play Splinter Cell: Conviction. Drink every time you hear "Fisher." You're going to get pretty drunk pretty soon.
Take a shot every time you die. HAHAHA just kidding, don't do that, you'll die.
Dance Central is another great game to not just get drunk from. It's also great to play while drunk. Take a shot any time your friend looks stupid. On second thought, maybe every other time. Alcohol poisoning seems like it's not that fun.
This game had its flaws, but I still enjoyed the hell out of it. Take a shot any time you get caught off guard by a zombie. Take another shot when your weapon breaks. Take a celebratory shot when you kill a special zombie, like the Thug or Ram. I hate those guys.
Super Meat Boy
Oh, boy. This will only get worse the drunker you get. Take a shot when you get so frustrated that your buddies have to wrangle the controller out of your hands before you break it. If you're me, you might be taking a lot of shots playing this one.
The sequel will be coming out in September, but there's no need to neglect the awesome first FPS/RPG hybrid from developer Gearbox. When there's a fight for the loot stash and someone steals that shiny new weapon right from under your nose, you know what to do.
Grand Theft Auto IV
There are lots of fun things you can do that involve drinking and Grand Theft Auto. Drink when you attract the cops. Drink when you hit other cars while (in-game) driving. Just keep drinking and blowing stuff up.
Game of Thrones
So, this one obviously isn't a game, but it's the Game of Thrones! Who wouldn't want to drink to that. Plus, we already have a fantastic drinking game built for the show, so let's do it up.
These are just a few of my imaginations. You can take the suggestions you like, drink in disgust at the ones you don't, and invent nonsensical ones as you get drunker. Just as long as you celebrate Cinco de Mayo in the way it was meant to be celebrated: plastered with a sombrero covering your face in shame. Happy fiesta-ing, Kotaku.