Unlikely Fan Fiction Crossover Battle: Link Encounters ResistanceColorful. Bright. Cartoonish. These are all adjectives used to describe the light-hearted and airy adventures found in Insomniac's Resistance series. What happens when Nintendo's dark anti-hero Link comes on the scene? Glorious chaos.

In the realm of video game crossover fan fiction there are plenty of pairings that make perfect sense. Mega Man and Street Fighter, for instance, share a publisher, so the mind doesn't have to stretch too far. Dead or Alive and Rumble Roses both feature well-endowed women beating each other up, so that would work as well, although it would likely end up in the "mature" section.

The Legend of Zelda and Resistance: Fall of Man is not one of those natural combinations. With wildly different themes, atmospheres, and exclusive consoles, it would take a masterful fan fiction author to marry these two worlds in a way that makes any sense whatsoever.

He tried to say "Why?" but it turned into a scream as the monstrous claws went through the poor man's abdomen. Then, the claws separated vertically, ripping the man in half horizontally. Blood fell out of the body like a waterfall, and intestines went flying everywhere. I threw my sword at where the ripping began and it stabbed the monster, which then became visible.

We have found that master.

That's an excerpt from daedalus the architect's "Legend of Zelda: Fall of Man". See, the title takes part of The Legend of Zelda and combines it with part of Resistance: Fall of Man. In literary circles this is known as denouement (editor's note: no it isn't).

Daedalus's tale picks up at the end of The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask. Right off the bat the author completely spoils the game's ending.

"Holy Din," I said gasping for breath. Even in my Fierce Diety form, that was hard."that was quite a fight." Talt hovering over my shoulder, I saw Majora's Wrath dancing its death cry.

"Well Link, let's get out of here!" Talt said. I nodded in response. I was about ready to leave when Majora's Wrath snapped one of its whips at me, wrapping me up. "LINK!" cried Talt, rushing to my aid. It seemed that the monster was going to commit suicide and take me out with it. So I braced for death; then everything went white.

You'll notice right away that the story is written in first-person, perhaps a nod to Resistance, which is a first-person shooter. Or the author just wanted to pretend he was Link. I'll believe the former, while secretly suspecting the latter.

As the Nintendo 64 epic comes to a close, Talt and the Great Fairy practice the magical art of foreshadowing.

We later arrived at the Great Fairy's fountain. Talt whispered to her about something. She nodded her head in approval, turned to me, and said, "For services rendered to this land and to my siblings, I grant you the power of regeneration. With this ability, you can heal the physical wounds of others and yourself using magic. You will also heal yourself at a very slow, but constant rate without the use of magic.

I know what you're thinking: "Why didn't he receive that powerful ability during his previous adventure? It's okay, Link's thinking it too.

I just stood there thinking: Nayru, why didn't I get this during my journey? I smiled and said, "Thanks, I'll use it well" I turned to Talt and said, "Thanks for everything, Talt. Now I'll leave this world. Goodbye." After getting supplies, I went to the base of the clock tower, and Epona and I entered the Lost Woods.

Ah, the Lost Woods, the perfect setting for a mystical portal to another place and time. Link and his beloved equine companion soon find themselves in a very different set of woods, facing a very different sort of man.

Epona and I were trotting along in this forest when I came across a man covered from head to toe in black, unusual clothing. The man also carried a device, clutching it like I would my bow, so I assumed it was his weapon. I brought out my sword, pointed it at him, and commanded, "Who are you?"

That's not a very nice way to greet a new friend, Link. I suppose it doesn't matter, because before the man can explain himself the opening quote from this story happened, showering Link and Epona with gore. Ew.

It was about 7-and-a-half feet tall, with four claws on the end of each of its thick arms. It had greenish reptilian skin, stained red where my sword struck, with ripping muscles under some thin armor. The head was sort of hunched over, the size of the head was a bit small for its body. The face was horrible, the mouth looked liked it had its lips sliced clean off, revealing huge, razor sharp teeth. The eyes, all six of them, were pure gold in color. It also had some sort of device infused to its back, which stuck out like spines. The armor and device was made of an alloy that I can't identify. I don't know what it is, but I know it's dangerous.

This is where the author takes certain liberties with the character. Link, as has been established, is an expert at identifying alloys. He quickly reins the story in as the battle begins, Link reacting with the lightning reflexes of a seasoned warrior.

I got off my horse and strapped her to a tree. I went to the monster and pulled my sword out. Damn, now I'll have to clean this later.

At this point in the story I was totally engrossed in this strange and wonderful adventure. Then daedalus has to go and do this:

When I was walking to my horse, she started getting out of control, pulling on her restraints like she was trying to get away from something. I got out my Lens of Truth and activated it, just in time to see one of those monsters tear my poor horse to pieces with those claws.

He. Killed. Epona.

What happens next? Who cares? Link's best friend and boon companion was just torn to bloody pieces. If I were Link I would have just lay down and died right there. What's the point of living?

Thankfully I am not Link in this story; daedalus is, and daedalus Link has better uses for his rage and sorrow. He dispatches the strange creature with an Ice Arrow to the back, after which the armed soldier that was apparently watching the whole horse dismemberment thing finally decides to show himself.

The man ran up to me and said, "Hey kid, why aren't you in a protection camp? You know we're in a world war, right?"

I said, "War? Against those monsters with the huge claws? The man commented on how he saw a horse carcass back a bit with the name Epona on a name tag around its neck. I told him that was my horse-I'll destroy them for killing my horse.

Awww, he even gave the horse a collar. That... makes sense.

As much sense as what happens next. The soldier, confronted with a young elf boy in the woods, reacts as any real-world soldier would in a similar situation: He recruits him and teaches him about guns.

"A firearm is any weapon that uses a certain amount of explosive to make enough pressure to propel a projectile a certain distance." We started walking a bit when he said, "The chimera are a species of celestial origin. Their technology is hundreds of years ahead of ours and they reproduce using a virus to transform other living creatures into them, so there are multiple um.. strains of chimera. Variations of those monsters." I would have asked what a virus was but he "shush"ed me. I listened and I heared cooing sounds, similar to a bird. "Sounds like a pigeon." he murmured.

I said, "Yes, I hear a pigeon. I also hear growling sounds, like a predator ready to pounce." I told him I would like a shooting lesson now. He rejected the idea, saying this strain of chimera is invisible. I said, "I have an artifact that my people crafted that can see through illusions. These creatures-chimera you call them-are no different." He told me to use it and gave me his big firearm.

It's Link's Carbine Training!

After a brief shooting lesson in which Link takes down a Chimera in three shots—something I can barely do in the game—he finally asks the man his name. It is, of course, Nathan Hale, hero of Resistance and Resistance 2. The pair instantly form a tight bond, which is sure to come in handy as the story progresses.

Nathan was ready to advance when I held him back and whispered, "Chameleons, get your small gun on the ready." He did and commented on the fact that for further reference, it's an HE .44 Magnum with glycerin rounds. I was lost so I said, "Whatever." I got out and activated my Lens of Truth, got my gun at the ready, and scanned the tree-stumped field for chameleons. I found five of them and said to Nathan, "We got 2 chameleons at 11o'clock, one at 12o'clock, and 2 at 1o'clock."

And that's why they call him the Hero of Time.

Craving more? Of course you are. I won't steal daedalus the architect's thunder any longer. Hit up the link to read all ten chapters.

Legend of Zelda: Fall of Man [FanFiction.net]