I Am Alive's Creator Does Just About Everything He Can to Piss Off PC Gamers in Explaining Why They Don't Get a Version of the Game

Here's a heartwarming tale full of good holiday cheer. In an interview with IncGamers, Stanislas Mettra, the creative director behind Ubisoft's thought-provoking survival tale I Am Alive said chances of a PC port are about zero because a) um, piracy and b) lol, nobody buys PC games anymore.

U mad? Oh, it gets better, Mettra thinks your outrage may be sincere but it's not predicated on any real desire to actually buy the game. He thinks you just want to bitch about it. Let's play the Feud!

"We've heard loud and clear that PC gamers are bitching about there being no version for them," Mettra told IncGamers.

"It's hard because there's so much piracy and so few people are paying for PC games that we have to precisely weigh it up against the cost of making it," he told IncGamers.

As for those who want to debate that, "Are these people just making noise just because there's no version or because it's a game they actually want to play? Would they buy it if we made it?" Mettra says sales of 50,000 copies on the PC wouldn't be enough to justify a dozen guys doing a three-month port job.

Well alrighty! That sounds like a giant fuck-you to me, and par for the course from a publisher already widely despised by the PC gaming crowd. If I were Ubisoft, I'd prepare a sorry-if-you're-offended apology but make sure it's sent only via email. That way PC gamers have to have an Internet connection to read it.

Despite the 'bitching', piracy means I Am Alive is not likely on PC [IncGamers via Shacknews]


You can contact Owen Good, the author of this post, at owen@kotaku.com. You can also find him on Twitter, Facebook, and lurking around our #tips page.