So here's something I watched, and now you're going to watch it, after which point you'll probably say, "Wow, I watched that."

Inspired by Gears of War's "Meat Shield," the guys at Epic Meal Time have teamed up with FPS Russia and GameStop to make this video "how-to" guide, detailing… how to make a suit of body-armor out of actual meat.

Ingredients include a few thick slabs of ribs, tray after tray of bacon strips, and some "big-ass pepperonis," which I would imagine are best served alongside some extra big-ass fries.

The meat shield assembled, things get a little bit weird as FPS Russia's Kyle Myers empties a few clips into it, intercut with Epic Mealtime's MusclesGlasses actually eating the whole thing.

So while it doesn't have anything to do with Gears of War specifically, it is an enjoyably goofy orgy of meat-consumption and automatic weaponry.


You can contact Kirk Hamilton, the author of this post, at kirk@kotaku.com. You can also find him on Twitter, Facebook, and lurking around our #tips page.