What, you thought Platinum Games' online multiplayer brawler was just a bunch of super-powered beings battling each other for no reason? No sir, there is some sort of story going on in Anarchy Reigns; it just happens to involve a lot of punching, kicking, and stabbing.

Shit's going down in Altambra, yo, which I'm imagining as a terrifying hybrid of Atlanta and Birmingham, Alabama. That makes it much easier to buy the premise of lawless backwoods cyborgs battling it out in the streets. We're just a robotic limb or two away from making this a reality.

So there's some normal proportioned girl that wants the ridiculously out-of-proportion Jack Cayman to find her father, the pretty boy is some sort of police investigator, and "Max didn't do this". I'm invested already! Can we fight now?