I'm not a fit guy, partly because I eat like crap and drink like a carp. But I go to the gym, if only to burn off the bad calories. And January is the worst month for going.
We're on Jan. 21, which means another three weeks, at least of "The Resolutions" monopolizing the cardio equipment before they give up. It's not a bogus trend, the parking lot at mine is absolutely jampacked during the hour I normally go, and that's about 10 a.m.
Folks who've decided to hit the gym as a New Year's promise aren't as likely to go to the free weights. Then again, neither am I. But In December I could go to my gym and have my pick of the equipment. For the past three days I've been using a treadmill in bad need of a belt waxing, with a display programmed in Spanish.
Anyway, talk about your New Year's Resolutions, and those who are keeping you from completing them, while you consider these topics.
- Captain America will be retitled as "The Last Avenger" in Russia and South Korea, to not offend sensibilities there.
- A sports writer tracks down a troll and, naturally, discovers that his tormenter is not such a bad guy after all. I don't think it's because trolls are, deep down, conflicted individuals who want to go out for hamburgers and sing a Fat Albert song when they learn someone cares. I think it's because trolls, when confronted in real life, magically turn into pussies.
- Blanket for sale on eBay, measuring 80 by 67 inches, made of 100 percent genuine hamster fur. Asking $3,999.
- I'm not sure how to explain this, but an expert witness used some stock photos to show how images could be manipulated into depicting child pornography. He's now being sued by the parents of the kids involved.