When I wrote about that amazing Mario Kart board game last week and posted the video, a few of you said someone should make a little remote-control race track based on Nintendo's popular game. Damn you!

Not only does such a thing exist, it was shown off at this year's Tokyo Toy Show. And boy is it depressing, packed with flimsy bits of colored paper and painfully-routine slotted cars. Where are the slotted turtle shells? Where is the turbo button?

This is the sort of toy that kills dreams. I hope you're happy Internet!