A Week In CommentsS

New Pokemons You Can Cuddle
Comment by: Trygle12's posts considered harmful!
Nominated by: ElPenguinoMasFino

Zorua used Snuggle!
The foe is overcome by DAWWWW!

Zorua used Double Team!
It's evasion sharply rose!
The foe is overcome by DAWWWW!

Zorua used "Hyper Voice"!
The foe is rattled by 10 different action phrases!!

The foe is overcome with desire to purchase item!

The foe has purchased Zorua doll!
Wallet blanked out!

Activision Claims World Record in Double Down Speed-Eating
Comment by: bfwings55
Nominated by: cokefan999

Ugh. I am sick and tired of Activision trying to destroy the fast food industry.

First, they acquire fast food restaurants that make one good burger. Then they tell that restaurant to make a new burger to be released every holiday season. Then, Activision sues the two heads of the restaurant saying that they went from fine chefs to greedy french fry hoarders.

And now so many people have quit that restaurant that they barely have enough people to run the grill.

I hope Kotick stops this nonsense, before we are all tired of their sandwiches.

I mean, come on. They already ran the KFC Guitar Hero meal into the ground. Nobody cares about that meal anymore.

You Cannot Club Seals On The iPhone
Comment by: idDobie
Nominated by: Killer Toilet

I'd read the article... get to the PETA sends you candy link... I'd click it... I'd be at the top... I'd read the article... get to the PETA sends you candy link... I'd click it... I'd be at the top... I'd read the article... get to the PETA sends you candy link... I'd click it... I'd be at the top... I'd read the article... get to the PETA sends you candy link... I'd click it... I'd be at the top... I'd read the article... get to the PETA sends you candy link... I'd click it... I'd be at the top... I'd read the article... get to the PETA sends you candy link... I'd click it... I'd be at the top...

Talk Amongst Yourselves
Comment by: VincentGrey
Nominated by: ViewtifulJoe

So I let this girl move into my house with me yesterday. With me and my cat. We'd been seeing each other for some time already and we really both loved each other, so i thought 'might as well.'
Anyways, she goes to the kitchen while I'm taking a nap, and for some reason or other, she forgets to take out whatever she was cooking, so I just wake up and hear screaming. Turns out its her and that the stove is on fire. Apparently, she also doesn't know how to use a fire extinguisher, so I have to do it. as Im standing there trying to extinguish the fire that has already expanded all the way to the microwave and Espresso machine, I ask her to call Emergency. she's just screaming and screaming, I had to tell her like 10 times before she actually went and did it....but then the phone starts ringing, and it also turns out that she can't call someone while the phone is ringing. All she can do is answer it.
So the police came and took my cat after that. No one could take care of her anymore.

Oh, I died. And I was playing the Sims 2.

This Is How You Promote An Adult Video Game
Comment by: hazelnut
Nominated by: AOClaus

The Boobs on the bus go bouncy bouncy,
bouncy bouncy,
bouncy bouncy.
The boobs on the bus go bouncy bouncy,
all through the town.

The kid on the bus says "What is That?
What is That?
What is That?".
The kid on the bus says "What is That?",
all through the town.

The mommy on the bus says "Oh My God;
Oh My God;
Oh My God"
The mommy on the bus says "Oh My God"
all through the town.

Halo: Reach's Extended 'Birth of a Spartan' Is Here
Comment by: affable.gentleman
Nominated by: mr_godot

I still remember the first time I saw my friend playing Halo: Combat Evolved. I was in the Army on a deployment to Afghanistan right after September 11th. I was in a tent in Khandahar and I had just got back from a two week mission in the mountains. Two of my buddies were playing co-op on the second level when you first land on the ring and you have to defend the buildings from the Covenant dropships who keep bringing more Elites.

I grew up playing only Nintendo systems so I'd never seen co-op before. I was speechless. They were coordinating attacks and flanking the groups of baddies. I remember my mouth dropping open when my buddy stuck one of the aliens with a plasma grenade.

I sold my Playstation 2 for $200 to one of the S&T platoon guys and walked up to the PX to see if I could order an Xbox. In some crazy cosmic chain of events, the PX has recieved a shipment of books and video games earlier that day and they had 3 or 4 Xboxes, Halo:CE, and Splinter Cell. It changed my life.

In between missions, we'd link our systems together and have huge battles between squads and platoons. I still remember the huge brawls we'd have over those games. Despite the bloody lips and bruised egos, Halo brought us together. I haven't found another game like it, before or since

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