Kotaku Originals: I Said Turn Off That Machine Now!S

This week Crecente ported some game classics to a more analog platform - the back yard. Reminds me of the time Mom kicked me and Fletch out of the house and we played Atari's "Adventure."

This was also in the middle of summer vacation and Mom was at the end of her rope. Fletch and I had already created a scandal by stealing scrap wood from Dr. Perry's lumber pile to make (and attempt to set fire to) the Phoenix from Battle of the Planets. Inside we were fighting over the Atari, so Mom unplugged it, stuffed it in a cabinet and threw us out in the yard.

I forget what the rules were, but since I was the younger brother, I didn't make them up. I think I was the cube and Fletch was the green dragon, and when he ate me (no, not that way) and refused to let me "reincarnate" I bitched about it so relentlessly, Mom got on the phone to Dad demanding country justice. "They're whining and moaning about dragons and Yorgle and some goddamn thing ..."

So remember, it all looks fun when Dick and Jane are wearing bags on their heads playing tag; but as soon as they start arguing about sprite collision IRL, you can kiss the ass of that idyllic summer goodbye.

We had a load of other copy this week, too. Check out the list below:

Kotaku at Comic-Con 09

Summer of Gaming
Have We Reached Exercise Game Saturation?
Backyard Adaptations Of Video Game Classics

Previews, Reviews, Hands-On and Impressions
Bit Boy Micro-Review: Stuck In The Past
Dead Space Extraction Preview: What The Wii Can Do
IL-2 Sturmovik: Birds of Prey Preview: If You Think Planes Are Beautiful
The Secret Of Monkey Island SE Micro-Review: Still Fights Like A Cow
The Beatles: Rock Band Preview: Get Back In Harmony
Champions Online Combat Preview: Challenge Accepted
Wizard of Oz Preview: Partying Up With The Tin Man

News
Resident Evil Series Unsure On Direction, Developers
Call of Duty: World at War Map Pack 3 Screens
Castlevania Icon Koji Igarashi Still At Konami, Working On New Project
Ex-Visceral Execs Making Game Based On Existing Activision Franchise, Leading New Studio
BioShock Action Figures Ready To Set Bees Upon Comic-Con
New Beatles: Rock Band Trailer Confirms Eight More Tracks
Microsoft Patents Drop-In Co-Op In Shooters
Greenpeace Turns PS3, Wii, 360 Into Spokesmen Against Toxicity in Consoles
Which Game Character Would Star in the Game of Your Life?
Daigo Wins 2009 Evo Champs
33 Months Of Motion Control, The Wii's Hidden Struggle
Microsoft Seeks a Few Good Store Managers
Gold Cartridge Buyer Recreating Nintendo Championships Today

Xbox Live
Hands On With Xbox 360's New Dashboard
Netflix Party Play in Action
Xbox 360 Avatar Marketplace: Giant Cotton Swabs to Steampunk Goggles
How Much Xbox 360 Avatar Clothes And Toys Cost
Making Xbox Live Safe, While Keeping It Fun
Frak to Cleveland Steamer: Xbox Live's Big Book of Forbidden Words
New Dashboard Commercials Bring Ad Breaks To Your 360
The Rising Price Of XBLA Games
August Xbox 360 Update Bears Good News About Save Files

Band Hero DS
Band Hero DS Braces For The Skeptics, Offers A Lot
The Band Hero DS Drum Peripheral Revealed

Wii Sports Resort
Getting Barefoot With Nintendo
How Wii Sports Resort Took Over Times Square

Mobile/Handheld
Gangstar Preview: Very Much Like GTA On An iPhone
Lots of People Bought iPhones
New Shin Megami Tensei Game Coming To DS
Dev: DSi Is "A More Powerful Platform" Than DS Lite

Mobile Ads
ESA Sues For Rights To Advertise Games On Chicago Buses
CTA Defends Anti-video Game Ad Ordinance

Bigtime Spoiler Alert
A Gears Of War Screenplay: Our Thoughts [Update]