That's right, four score and seven years ago today at Valley Forge, John F. Kennedy and the Lone Ranger chopped down the cherry tree that Squanto ate at the first Thanksgiving, and Paul Revere hung a light in the Alamo to alert Teddy Roosevelt's Rough Riders: "N00B, red team has taken teh control point, FAIL." Then Batman crossed the Atlantic in an X-Wing Fighter to accept the Heisman Trophy from Winston Churchill, and Martin Luther King Jr. said "God bless us, every one of us."
Oh wait, today's July 5th. Shit.
Well, for those in the USophile-speaking world, this is a three day weekend and you should still be burning large amounts of animal flesh on a grill for the next two days, or else you hate freedom. And for that reason, Kotaku's U.S. staff is on an abbreviated schedule today and tomorrow. Our updates will come every two hours today and tomorrow, then it's back to full-strength when Luke Plunkett and the freedom-hating Australians take up the cause late Sunday evening. Until then, I regret that I have but these stories (more after the jump) to give to my country:
Battlefield: Bad Company Review: Going For The Gold
Once a Labor of Love, Sales of Football Rosters Now Inflame Passions
Former CEO Of Struggling Atari Got One Hell Of A Golden Parachute
Is Chrono Trigger DS Coming To America?
Xbox 360 Getting a 3D Dashboard Make-Over?
Too Human Hands-On: Six Hours In And Half-Way Home
The Man Behind Diablo III Talks Plot, Lore and Battle.Net