This hits close to home, because home is a shithole (that's what $1500 rents you in Silicon Valley) and I'll soon be paying IKEA plenty to make it look less so, because it's right around the corner in the East P.A. and I can't afford Ethan Allen. And if you want to trick out your Sims pad with BJARNUM or HENSVIK or DIKTAD or whatever fake words the Swedes come up with next, that expansion pack has now dropped (as of Thursday). This is the trailer showing all the shit you'll be throwing in your Sim dumpster in three years.

Clearly, there is very little probative value to this post, I just wanted to write the word DIKTAD (the name of a toy chest they sell). Three years ago my friend Ryan (Flying Squirrel, to those in the know), who now writes for the Sacramento Bee, went to IKEA with me to help me trick out my former shithole (rented for $1095 a month. Housing bubble? What is this you speak of? Rent is a rock solid investment that only appreciates.) We came around the corner and saw DIKTAD and that instantly became our new term of abuse for each other, like "Heat Stick" and "Grandma's Tongue." And now I bequeath it to you. Please call each other that in the comments.

The Sims 2 IKEA Home Stuff Trailer [Simprograms]