Kotaku
Michael Bay is a powerful man. He's not a fucking retard. So when Uwe Boll called Michael Bay a fucking retard, the Armageddon director thought he should, you know, say something. On his own official message board, Bay wrote:
I find people who rant like that - calling shit about both me, and George Clooney - comes from someone screaming because he is not being heard. He is obviously a sad being. When you ask 'do I care?' Not in the slightest.M
Yah, Michael cares about other things. Important things. Things like blowing shit up. Elsewhere director Eli Roth, who was also slammed by Boll, said the remarks were the "greatest compliment ever." That's what the kids call being facetious.
Being Called A Retard [The Official Michael Bay Forums via bingegamer] [Pic]
Comments
That man sure takes his breakfast seriously.
This is hilarious, two sub-par directors flinging mud at each other. At least one of them made some money.
For the first time in my life I find myself agreeing with Michael Bay. It's a sobering experience.
Mine ears belong only to Uwe
Get these men some swords. Whoever loses, we win :D
Boosh
SUPER HOLLYWOOD DIRECTOR BRAWL
Nintendo, get on it!
hehe....coming from Michael Bay that's a statement. The man couldn't direct traffic.
I just can't tihnk of a good tansfromers joke to go with this article
Oh come ON people, you know that Bay would win in a fight, Boll would go into some stupid boxing stance and Bay would hit a button and Boll would explode. :P
Sounds like the first Bay production I'd actually *ENJOY*
@Hitokiri151: good idea
I prefer Michael Bay over Uwe Bollshit any day
Ahh so good, yet so bad. I want hard proof that these men aren't retarded.
By the way, everyone should click the link and observe the 'tard avatar for M. Bay.
I guess its "cool".
The first of the 2 men, to send me $1000 US, will be declared my winner!
In fact, I will tattoo their name on my arm and I will pay for that tattoo out of the $1000!
So hurry up Michael or Uwe, send me money!
I like Bay's movies. I'm sorry.
Context is everything.
Uwe is pimping his new movie, that is a teen comedy with crude jokes and stuff. Anything that he will say has to be see in that light.
Of course, Uwe is "trolling" (to use the internet word).
He could have chose a different way to pimp his movie, but trolling kind fit a movie about be jerk.
Don't go "Postal" for this.
Michael Bay demands things being AWESOME!
@Scruffylookin13: And/or Kakow!
I wouldn't exactly call Michael Bay a retard, but I'm not a big fan of the way he shakes the camera so much during his action scenes that all you see is fast moving blurs and you can't tell what the hell is going on. South Park did a good bit with him when he was asked by the government to help stop terrorists, but he couldn't tell the difference between original ideas and special effects.
That being said, I do think The Rock is an awesome movie.
Michael Bay may not be a retard, but he's not very skilled in the filmmaking arts (aside from The Rock).
Why does Kotaku have five stories on Uwe Boll every week, who cares/
Every time boll talks, he always causes trouble. Sure I like some bay movies, but either way we lose. I wouldn't stand behind any of these two.
To be fair to Uwe, it is tough to watch a film like Armageddon or The Rock and not think, "Whoever made this is fucking retarded."
@jcsunshine:It's because they are called "Mindless action movies" You switch off higher brain functions and just ENJOY them, one reason so many people seem to have the worst case of butt-hurt from him is because they refuse to do that. These are the same people who act like G1 Transformers (The cartoon) was on par with War and Peace for writing.
Boll's movies can only be enjoyed by complete and total brain death, something you can't just switch on and off with a switch.
I thought Transformers was kinda retarded?
Brekfast iz serius biznes. At least for Michael Bay. But I do admit, hearing him call Uwe Boll a very sad individual made my day a much better one.
If Bay responded similarly they'll be both retards. Im siding with Michael Bay on this.
If Uwe had said that Michael Bay was his greatest hero, it would have made a lot more sense to be honest.
@OGHowie: So the peeing robots and transforming vending machines didn't do it for you either, huh?
Bay's movies cause me pain in my Uwe Bowels.
Even if Bay's movies are slightly 'retarded' and cliched, at least Bay has a good grasping of basic movie staples like pacing of story, character (as cartoon cliche as his characters are at least they're memorable), PRODUCTION VALUES( yeah Boll may be on a tighter budget but Rodriguez struck gold with $10,000 making El Mariachi ) and many more things beside.
I can't believe how infallible Boll is, still insisting that he himself is a 'genius' and people 'don't get it'.
Unless he's trying to write a masterclass in irony I'd have to compare him with Robert Mugabe in terms of self-delusion and elavated sense of self worth. Of course, the ruination of a nation hasn't been attributed to Boll, just yet, but I think the average score of cultural exports of Germany have been downgraded ever since Boll started producing celluloid shit.
I'm sorry but atleast Bay's movies actually make money and that is the point of a movie is it not, specially in Bay's case since we all know they don't really make any statments, come on don't stand there and tell me that Bad Boy's two wasn't a good movie, or that he didn't do a good job with Transformers, or that you were not entertained by The Island. Ok maybe it's just me but I would take Bay over Boll anyday.
Michael Bay's too busy trying to get his $50 bucks from Amazon for that HDDVD player he bought to respond Gamecockily. Besides, everybody knows Uwe Bolls wobble but they don't fall down.
So Michael Bay ISN'T a fat guy?
I've been wrong this whole time... :/
STEP AWAY FROM THE EGG. IT'S GONNA BLOW!!!
@OGHowie:
OMG thank you! I'm glad I'm not the only one!
In all honesty, I would take a Michael Bay movie over any of the garbage Mr Boll makes. Actully i think Michael bays stuff should not that bad, and is a HUGE contrast from Bolls garbage...
Clearly he cares and his pissed it seems because you wouldn't comment on something (on a personal blog even) when your comment wasn't explicitly requested unless you cared. This is dismissive minimalism at its finest :)
honest to god truth, i never watched Uwe boll movie or heard of Uwe Boll BUT I have heard and watched a Bay movie. so in fairness, suck a nut Boll ;(
Being called a fucking retard by Uwe Boll is like being told to sit up straight by the Hunchback of Notre Dame.
Maybe Uwe Boll is right? I have seen enough Michael Bay movies to know the outcome and pretention of just about all his films. Maybe, just maybe Uwe Boll is a fucking retard, and Boll is himself clever enough to realize this.
Please, we need to help fight for Uwe, here is a wonderful petition that is fighting the "right cause". All support is appreciated!!
[www.petitiononline.com]
Bay IS an absolute retard which explains why his movies are so utterly popular. Boll is just a fantastic con man, which explains why all his movies bomb like they fell out of the Enola Gay but he's STILL a very rich man.
Oh great . . . someone go fetch Uwe Boll's boxing gloves . . .
Here we go again.
I like Michael Bay. I guess that means I am not one of the cool kids... :(
Uwe Boll > Michael Bay. Michael Bay movies are montages of retarded characters and events, with a few mind blowing explosions thrown in to appeal to the people who like flashing pretty colors, which is his core demographic.
Uwe Bolls films are deeper, more cerebral, and must be taken and pondered to be fully appreciated. His upcoming film postal is a comic masterpiece.
You guys misunderstand Uwe Boll, please sign this Pro-Uwe Boll petition, believe it or not he has alot of potential to create even greater films in the future,no need to focus on his mis-steps!
[www.petitiononline.com]
Please sign the petition!!
I bet Uwe Boll is doing little hops and saying "Yay, even bay fell for my marketing ploy! Postal is a sure hit now."
While I'm no fan of Michael Bay by any means, an enemy of Uwe Boll is a friend of mine.
@PrivateJ0ker:
Hallo Uwe!
Na? Wie läufts?
Looks like Mr. Bay is enjoying one of the new Power-Thirst flavors with his eggs.
:D
Kill each other.
I beg them.
If one of them must survive...well, at least Uwe is entertaining in an unintentional way.
Michale bay makes a very specific type of movie for a very specific target audience. It may not be everyone's cup of tea, but he does what he does very well, he knows his market.
Uwe Boll is just an incompetent amateur who has found a tax loophole that he can exploit to raise funds for his half assed attmpts at directing.
That's it. Bring back Celebrity Deathmatch: Film Makers Edition. Each stage can be based off of a movie. Props from the movies can be used as weapons. Only give everyone real weapons except for Uwe. That'll teach 'em...
Uwe Boll not being heard?
What are you, a fucking retard?
/LOL
he cared enough to reply....
both of them are talentless people.