Kotaku
If you're not familiar with Gamebryo, it's the middleware solution from Emergent Game Technologies. Right. The only thing you, the reader, really needs to know is that it's pioneering self-shadowed boobs. Subtly swaying, inhumanly massive boobs. This is the kind of stuff GDC attendees are most excited about—a pair of perfectly rendered double Ds struggling to be free of a metal bra while having realistic shadows cast upon them. It's also part of the reason GDC is 90% dudes.
Yes, GameTrailers has extended cuts and high definition versions. Just don't watch at work.
Comments
Can't wait to see the comments on this article.
Heh heh.
This almost ties the strangeness of... regenerating trees.
The dramatic zoom-in to the moneyshot was full of win.
Best rendered pair of ka dunk-a dunks.
Ain't no party like a sex appeal to show game technology paaaarty!
Such an epic pair of sweater muffins...
Could the music have been any worse?
Hahaha can't wait to see the ear shadowing technology. O.O
Virtual boobies just don't do it for me, I much prefer the real ones.
Realistic shadows however? That's enough to get my blood flowin'.
I wish that music played when my girl friend took off her shirt. I mean it plays it my head, but I wish it played on the stereo.
I wish that music played when my girl friend took off her shirt.
I mean it plays in my head, but I wish it played on the tv or stereo.
Truly, the future is now.
How is this any different to other self-shadowing?
@Crosswayboy: Reminded me a bit of Earth: Final Conflict
Has this not been done before or something?
If the demo wasn't funny enough alone, the music topped it off. I couldn't help but laugh out loud!
I don't know why everyone's so hung up on boobs anyway. Anyone with it knows that the future is self-shadowing balls. You heard me.
epic musi...
EPIC BOOBS!!!
@Barob, who needs a new picture already.:
Ditto
I'm glad this conference gives independent developers the recognition they need,
and the gamers what they want.
OMG best video ever!! :D
*fap fap fap fap*
Realistic Man-Bulge technology to be shown next.
@UltimatePancakeSensation: Too long have we lived in the shadow of Custer's Revenge quality scrotum. The future is now!
@Erwin:
AMEN
Next up, realistic badonkadonk movement while walking and running.
And here, ladies and gentlemen, is why gaming is never taken seriously. Deliver more lifelike AI routines? Try to recreate real world simulations in game form, such as weather patterns, food chains, or social/development routines amongst similar creatures?
Fuck that, let's shade us up some boobies.
Better than Epic's meat-cube for sure!
How do I invest in this company?
Finally! Virtual jubblies have a more realistic depth to them!
Also, the slow motion zoom on the newly-shadowed boobs had me cracking up too.
Gamebryo needs to license their engine to Capcom on the Street Fighter IV...
need those realistic shadows on those huge manginas on Ken and Ryu....
Not sure if I should laugh, shake my head in disgust, or be mildly aroused?
All three perhaps?
@Part-Time-Viking: I know what comment i'm nominating.
@Ampillion lives a life much like No More Heroes.: Well said.
I... guess... at least they aren't attempting to hide their objectification of women?
They posted the "today's most popular stories" just a bit too soon.
Man. I was going to make a post about how I feel bad for liking this, but FUCK THAT SHIT! I am a warm blooded heterosexual male and nothing pleases my eyes better than a nice pair of breasts. I found this fairly entertaining. All boob jokes aside, this technology does seem interesting.
first of all, a woman's pair of boobs are never identical, there is always one that is a bit different in shape and size. So I hope gd can take that into account when, simulating boobs.
@Ampillion lives a life much like No More Heroes.: I disagree. Boobies are serious business in real life too. More money is spent annually on breast augmentation surgery than the entire video game industry combined.
Hehe, you'd expect some epic pans of a warrior in deep thought with that music. SURPRISE!
Bewbies!
... Bewbies that are frozen solid!
I'm incredibly bothered by this video. It's the opposite extreme from DOA Beach Volleyball - those boobs are just... cast in iron or something. That's just NOT RIGHT.
Boobs are silly.
They made this video so epic.
What about those breasts was perfectly rendered? Unless the attempt was to render the worst plastic surgery imaginable, anyway.
A dramatic look at a brave new genre: 3rd person boobwatcher.
Boobs...serious business.
@rawg: That's the real world man. Virtual boobs do nothing for me. They don't enhance my gameplay or my daily life. Adding 'realistic shadowing technology' to something I won't bother looking at (unless there's some sort of boob ogling mini-game involved, in which I'd question the game itself for.) sounds like a huge waste of resources to me, unless this was created by one really bored guy, and is intended to help with shading on not just boobs, but entire character and creature models.
My gripe is more that, we could be moving forward other things in gaming, I thought simulated tits were fairly well covered by many developers.
Good luck with the competition, Gamebryo. Your boobs will serve you well into the future.
And somehow, Itagaki will still find a way to top this.
If master chief had boobs it would have been game over for the gaming industry.
It's too bad that after the intensive AI and graphics computation required to render those beauties, theres bugger all CPU-time left to add any enemy combatants.
@Majorasblaze likes to dance dance dance yeah: Compare this to the truly horrendous self shadowing in Mass Effect.
@Ampillion lives a life much like No More Heroes.: Apparently Gamebryo does more than just boob shadowing. They're one of the engines used in Oblivion, Fallout 3, Dark Age of Camelot, and Playboy: The Mansion. [en.wikipedia.org]
@TrustyBadger: Now why would you want to be fighting when you have quality one on one time with those milk mounds?
Boob Shadows Make Home Really, Really Cool!
BREAKING: Tecmo buys out Numerical Design Limited in hostile take-over.
they look stiff and unnatural
You obviously have been misinformed. You would need the new Aegis incorporated GPU or the renderer will seriously hamper your FPS.
@Dave Silva: Yeah, I was expecting so much more. Virtual bewbies have their place, but those were bad virtual bewbies.