Would you like to destroy my sweater?

Well, this conference has been uneventful. they didn't announce a single new exciting thing.

You forgot about that girl who was on stage with them.

Girls love purple... so... Bill Gates will be getting the most ass?

Good for him.

They will all pull more groupie ass anyone can imagine.

Hell, Bill could buy all of Slash's groupie's asses! And then breed them in a small country.

And no 360 Ultimate news either. Suddenly some of the guys at Stuff magazine look like Miss Cleo....

It's almost as if Bill Gates hires people to tell him to do these things because they are trendy and will make him look cool.

@Hatchetforce: You mean they are all fat black women with fake Jamaican accents?

@Hatchetforce:

The same "prediction" was done last year as well (not sure it if was Stuff or not) and it turned out to just be the Elite.

And with the current Blu-Ray announcements, it would be wise for MSFT, NOT to have an HD-DVD Xbox.

@PatMan33: there was really nothing about her worth mentioning.

@ceilingfanboy:

Yeah they are. Have you seen those guys? No wonder the women in the photo shoots do not feel threatened. Oh, on a side note their surefire prediction about a 320GB 360 blows. Hard.

Is there any way to make those two look more nerdy? I think not.

It can always be worse.

@Hatchetforce: Maybe Microsoft had the Ultimate 360 all lined up and ready to go, even on a nice little podium and everything, until they heard Warner's news and then Bill Gates ran to it in slow motion and dove at the 360 yelling "noooooooooooo" like Darth Vader as he went to capture the 360 and hide it before anyone saw it when they found out that it was a lost cause.

Ok, that wasn't as funny once I got it typed up as I had pictured it, but it would be a shame for all that typing to go to waste.

On a non related note, I just saw the funniest pregnancy test commercial that said that the pregnancy test was the most advanced technology that you will ever pee on.

@ MCWHERTOR.. I'll fucking rock your 80's!

That was great glam stuff man... GRRRR

Gates then showed Slash how to play Viva Pinata.

@syl1985: Nah, even I have to admit that 80s encore was not good. The covers were not good and the transfers to colors instead of notes seemed to not be as good as we're used to. The game was extremely easy and the game as a whole just seemed like a half hearted effort.

@ceilingfanboy: I actually think that's a fair possibility. HD-DVD must be going through some kind of rethinking process right now, and I doubt they would want to come out cocks waving if it's going to die soon anyway.

@ceilingfanboy:

Really? How fast is this "pee processor"?

I don't know about you guys, but this baby test thing is totally next gen!

@PriorMarcus: I think Microsoft can afford to trash a couple of prototype 360 Ultimates in order to save face and not embarrass themselves so it isn't that unbelievable.

@CitizenInsane27: Up to 5 days earlier detection! ZOMG!

Cashmere Rockah Y(*.*)Y WOOO!

@ceilingfanboy: It's more advanced than the Wii, then?

@ceilingfanboy:

Sorry but I can't buy they would back off. MS isn't one to let a dumb idea go since they would have already spun up so many divisions and sunk money into the venture.

Besides it still goes back to Miss Cleo. She could see the future but couldn't predict the fact the IRS was coming after her. Same thing here.

id tell thousands of people that i know slash. Wouldn't you.

Must have been an interesting backstage party:

*Slash starts walking to his dressing room, girls under each arm

Bill: "Hey Slash, want to hang out with us? We could share this Gatorade..."

*Slash keeps walking
*Slash slams his door shut

Bill: "Ok, I'll save your half for later! We'll be out here looking over these fiscal reports."

@Hatchetforce: I don't think that that is how it actually went down, it just seems believable to me.

bill gates looks like he came from a star trek convention.

Money makes you handsome/beautiful.

@ceilingfanboy: That's what I surmised in the "MS having the Biggest Year" post a little bit ago. Nice to see others thinking along the same lines. I think it would have garnered as much applause as the Halo 3 Edition 360 did back at E3. I know it would have been fantastic Flame-Bait for the BDA-fans and the gaming and electronics community in general after the last few days in the Next Gen DVD Battlefield.

@CFStang: Heh, there special edition systems never seem to go over so well.

Slash FTW.

@EnigmaNemesis: Haha, you put it perfectly.

This looks like it will work about as well as Velvet Revolver....perhaps even on the same level as Axl's pitiful attempts at tossing buckethead and some random flunkies onstage and calling it GNR. I don't blame Slash, the man just plays the hell out of whatever song, its not his fault the writing and vocals suck.

As to this idea that the Ultimate 360 would be canned by the "imminent death" of HD-DVD, I don't know, it seems like that was almost the least of its features. Of course, there is nothing stopping them from reneging on their stated "no HD-DVD games" pledge and going ahead with an HD-DVD 360, claiming that was their game all along. It would be one way they could get more out of the 360 and put off the upgrade that we all know is coming and will feel is too soon regardless of when, the lingering taste of the Xbox1's early demise helping to affirm that feeling.

Pshh... I wish Bill had actually played rather than just stand there while Slash rocked out.

Doesn't Bill Gates actually play Guitar? I'm pretty sure I read that somewhere.

This just shows you, With Money, you can afford Jay Z, Slash, George Clooney, Steven Spielberg, Jon Stewart all in one CES Party...wOw..

@kingme:

Who said anything about money. They must have known that this was the end of Bill at MS and they decided to put whatever they were doing (making money) and give Bill a proper go away. Yup that's what went down and if you disagree you have no soul.

the least they could've done to offset the cringe factor would be a bit of comic relief by dressing Slash in a pastel yellow sweater.

I love it when Bill geeks out and gets out of his comfort zone. It reminds you he's actually just some guy.

I mean, he's some guy who happens to be worth about 11 billion, but he's still some guy, right?

he's actually worth 69.7 BILLION fucking dowas

@ChinezePanda: Holy shit. I stand corrected by like a factor of 6 or something.

He totally needs to throw a couple of hundred my way this month ;)

@splines: I wouldn't doubt it if Gates has relinquished his human status in favor of a robotic brain. We just don't have a way to determine if this is true..

Just looking at the photo makes me shift uncomfortably.

It's really hard for me to picture 70 billion dollars. I mean I would be hard pressed to spend a billion dollars in a week. The most I could spend on a house is a few hundred million. A car would be maybe a million. A hundred thousand dollar super computer to play Crysis on high. Then what? I guess the rest I would buy pot or something.

@DaiMacculate: Maybe the system was about to come out and they canned it because by the time Microsoft stuck a $700 price tag on it, it would make the PS3 look like a real bargain.

to me this looks like bill was about to demo co-op play for guitar hero and WHAM slash jumps on stage and starts wailing.

at least thats how i picture it in my head, in the Land of Awesome.