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If you're bummed that you haven't been able to get your hands on a PS3 (and let's face it, that's nearly all of you), salvation may be at hand. Like, proper, literal salvation. Straight from Jesus to you, comes a PS3-for-free offer that's just too good to refuse.
Have you ever heard of Jesus Christ? Well, He's heard of you! And He wants you to have all the cool toys your parents are too cheap to buy! In fact, the Lord Jesus is very upset with your parents that they won't give you all the latest stuff that every kid in America deserves! And Jesus has got your back, because He is your homeboy! If you've never heard of Jesus, He is an invisible cloud-dwelling deity (infinite lives!) who loves you very much and wants nothing more than to give you a free PlayStation 3!All you need to do to take advantage of this generous offer is tell Jesus that "you'd rather have Him for your Daddy".
Why didn't they tell us this last week. It could have saved a lot of people a lot of trouble. Ah well, the Lord does work in mysterious ways, I guess.
Kids! Accept Jesus Christ as Your Lord and Savior and Get a Free PlayStation 3! [Landover Baptist Church]
PS - Landover Baptist Church aren't real. It's a joke site. I know you know that, just...clearing it up. Just in case. You know how people get about religion.
